A day at the ranch, part 1. (Artist: NotSp00ks)

“God dammit!” Craig shouted as he found out one of his horses had managed to get out of his pen and find all the spare hay. “How do you guys keep doing this!” Craig said to the brown stallion that had gotten into the spare hay. “If I didn’t love you guys so much I would’ve sold you off to the Canadians and let them eat you!” Craig liked to joke with his horses as if they understood him.

The brown stallion was taken back to his pen and given breakfast along with the other horses; a white and black stallion named Oreo, and a black horse with a question mark made of white fur on its forehead named Query. Craig loved all his horses and raised them from birth.

After feeding the horses, Craig decided to make himself breakfast, sit down, and watch some TV. Craig made some scrambled eggs with cheese, bacon, and a cup of coffee. Craig often thought how lucky he was to have his own eggs from his own chickens. After making breakfast, Craig sat on his couch and turned on the TV. Not to his surprise all the news talked about was Coronavirus. A few local news stations reported that fluffies were becoming less common in the streets, but they traced it back to coronavirus. Many people had asked Craig what he thought about fluffies. Craig didn’t really have an opinion on fluffies though. He was raised around horses and other livestock. The only time Craig ever saw a fluffy was when one tried to break into his farm. Luckily one of his dogs scared it away and he never saw any ever again.

Finally, Craig settled on a show, South Park, old reliable. Craig loved South Park ever since he was a kid. The episode on was some episode about the boys finding a fluffy and deciding what to do with it. Cartman of course wanted to screw with it and torture it. Kyle and stan just wanted to leave it be. Kenny on the other hand, thought about bringing it home to eat for his family. Cartman pulled his classic poor person joke on Kenny. Craig laughed, he always loved South Park and always found it funny.

A commercial break popped up, this of course made Craig mad. Craig has been trying to buy ad free-Hulu but we never could afford it. Most of the commercials were for products pertaining to fluffies and toys. Craig got up and decided to get something else to drink besides coffee. Craig suddenly heard the horses freaking out about something. Craig ran as fast as he could to the horse pens. He made it to the horse pens and heard something he hadn’t ever expected to hear; “Hewow nice mistuh!” It was a screeching choir of fluffies! “WHAT THE FUCK!” Craig shouted as the smell of shit and peeps of fluffy overwhelmed him. Hewd am find nummies and nyu howsies!” “Fank ou nice mistuh!” Craig wasn’t gonna let them steal his pens and hay. He decided to just walk away and decide what to do with the fluffies.

After a little bit of internet research, Craig found out the best way to get rid of fluffies was to abuse them. Craig however didn’t want to hurt any animal. He had no idea how he would get rid of them.

Since Craig had such a soft spot for animals, he decided to leave them there and let they stay for a while, but he would give them a few rules.

“SCREEEE SCAWY BIG FWUFFY MUNSTAH!!!” It seemed one of the horses had decided he had enough and started stomping on the ground. “WUN WAY SCREEEEEEE!” The fluffy suddenly shat all over the horse. That rancid smell of shit overwhelmed Craig and the horse seemed to hate it too. Craig had red that fluffies would shit while being abused but he didn’t know they could shit while being scared.

“Hewwo nice mistuh!” “Fwuffy am so happy dat nice mistuh give us new howsies!” The fluffies said. “Now who said I gave you permission to sleep here?” Said Craig. “Smawty fwend tew us dat ou say dis am new housies for hewd.” Said a neon green fluffy. “Well I never said you could live here okay? But I’ll le-“ Craig was almost instantly interrupted by a fluffy with a single horn on is head like a unicorn. “Dis am smawties house nao! Gib sketties and drinkies or ou get wowstest sowwie poopies!” The fluffy yelled. “Well, this isn’t your hou-“ Craig was suddenly interrupted by a stream of shit being sprayed on his leg by the fluffy. Naturally, Craig kicked his leg and hit the fluffy right in the ass sending it flying a few feet. “SCREEEEE MUNSTAH MISTUH HUWT SPECIAW FWEND!!” “BABBEHS NO WOOK!!!”

Craig left the pens, shut and locked the doors to male sure none of the fluffies could leave, and went to his bathroom. “Jesus Christ! This smells awful! Why the hell did this thing shit all over me!” Craig threw his pants into the washer and took a shower. “That fucking little shit! He thought he was entitled to my House!” It seemed Craig had a sudden change in heart about fluffies.

After the shower, Craig decided he already had enough and started forming a plan. It seemed those fluffies wouldn’t be welcome anymore.

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Apply a thread treatment to them and you’ll get easily rid of them

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