Bu-ba-ba-ba-gummies Cwisis by Motowhed

“…this has to be the silliest idea you’ve ever had.”

“It is NOT, remember when I got my hands on an entrenching tool at the beach? By sundown I was ready to declare my own nation and secede.”

“Don’t remind me. And this thing looks like you built it out of a couple kitbashed plastic models.”

“Oh come on! How can you not like it! Its super cool!”

“But why you gotta use my fluffy?”

“She’s a Kitsune! She’s Japanese! Its fits!”

“If she gets hurt or you fuck with her tails…”

“Daddeh? Wiwy am weady nao.”

The two humans looked down around the edge of the table they had been standing over at the fluffy sitting patiently. Her fluff was a bright red that darkened into a deep plum with red and yellow speckles all through it. Her eartips, a patch on her chest, and the tips of all 5 of her tails were yellow. Her name was “Lilliana Susan” after the Forever Susan breed of asiatic lilies, but everyone, including her owner Stanley “Spike” Pikowski, just called her Lily.

Spike had re ieved her as a birthday gift from his grandmother last year. Apparently she had adopted the fluffy for $5 from a shelter when her fluff had been off yellow and red and her tails hadn’t come in. Spike had taken it upon himself that summer to train and raise her while he prepared for college. As her colors and tails grew in, Spike, always a closet weeb, had also introduced her to concepts like cosplay and the odd bit of anime. She enjoyed going out in public and doing photoshoots in costume and had become a bit of an internet celebrity when he had created her own Fluffagram, Flufftube, and linked Flicktok (the logo was a flicking tail, don’t ask, out of touch college startup bronies). Spikes best buddy, Joshua, was a self proclaimed inventor. Mostly however he bought high end prosthetics and 3D printed parts so he could build weapons and accessories from anime and video games. And now…

"Daddeh? Ish time fo’ a-ben-cha?"Lily asked, head cocked to the side. Josh had filled her head that morning with promises of adventure, excitement, and a big ol’ bowl of skettis if she was a good girl. The reality was…

A plastic full body cast on motorized wheels painted and with little doodads attached to look like Priss’ armored suit from BubbleGum Crisis. Spike had no idea how Lily was supposed to move other than her head. He also didn’t like the idea of the wheels. Generally fluffies were somehow subconsciously suicidal at all times and seemed to defy basic principles of physics in their pursuit of a typically ridiculous and violent demise.

Spike breathed “okay Lily but…” Josh laughed and opened the contraption. “Be careful!” Spike said.
Josh snatched Lily up with glee and stuffed her legs into the costume, closing the upper halves over her back and slipping the helmet over her head. Lilly squeaked, farted, and swished her tails as the fed out a hole in the rear of the costume. He grabbed a remote control and stepped out into the backyard.

Dotting the grass in the yard were various small cardboard boxes with pictures of the series villains on taped to them. Spike heard Lilly staring to yell about weggies no working and why bright time was almost dark time due to the tinted visor of nthe helmet. Josh set her down in the grass and flicked a switch on the remote. With the press of a trigger and the turn of a wheel, Lily took off.

At barely faster than a fluffy gallop. Which as most of you know is about the same as a toddler who’s just gotten their sea legs and is pattering around the house at top, unbalanced speed. Spike couldn’t hear Lily over the whine of the little R/C electric motors and with her head muffled in the little cosplay helmet, but he was pretty damn sure she was screaming. He raised a hand to his kouth in horror. “What have I done?” he thought. Josh steered her first into one box, then another and another, Lily sending them flying with a “thump”. Her tails thrashed as she careened around, the garish plum, red, yellow display like a trailing bunch of balloons behind the blue and grey little costume. Josh launched her off a little carboard ramp, barely a 2 inch rise, and the little suit, landed softly before drifting around to thump another box. After a couple laps Josh brought the “hardsuit” back around and parked it in front of Spike. He was practically hopping with joy.

“That was awesome.” Josh crowed and set about righting the boxes and setting up his camera phone.

Spike walked over, seeing Lily’s tails swishing in different directions all at once. He steeled himself for a screaming, “Wan die” looped fluffy. This was a bad idea, his baby, his little sidekick! Oh god…

Lifting the helmet, Spike called gently “Lily? You okay?” What greeted him was worse than “Wan die”. Lilly had the biggest most excited grin on her face Spike had ever seen, she was making a soft “Eeeeeee” sound and she looked so overjoyed she was nearly derped.

Lily inhaled and “Daddeh joo see wah’ Wiwy did wit da vwoom vwoom fingy dat goo “eeeeEEEEeee” gu su fasht n sowwy hoovsie da munstas on da boxie n Wiwy fot dat i’ be owwies bu’ i’ nu owies n Wiwy gu su fast n di’ daddeh see Wiwy? Wiwy wanna gu gain, can Wiwy gu gain, su fastie-fas-fas-fas! Wiwy gu boops! N’ bumpies da munsta boxie!”

“What?”
“Wha’?”

Spike was silent for a moment. Great. His fastidiously clean, precocious, constanly posing, tails-swishing, typically somewhat timid little fluffy was now a box killing speed freak.

“Wiwy wanna gu gain”

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Super cute! I love Lily’s enthusiasm against Spike’s caution, nice flip of the usual.

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