"Rising Sun" Part 8 by NobodyAtAll

Part 7

As Dehak and Umbra struggle to process what’s just happened, I get back up, my regeneration kicking in, seeing my allies entering via slimy green portals, and the Helios and Pierre’s car landing.

The cavalry has arrived.

Scott lands, the Dark Demon wearing a dampening collar and wrapped in heavenly chains.

“You may not be a demon anymore, but your power of darkness is still vulnerable to the power of light.”

Deedee’s just glowering, clearly having nothing to laugh about.

I think we’ve missed a lot, Cal.

Eh, the readers still got to see a lot of cool stuff.

Blueberry’s Blaukörper lands.

“Da Manee wan away again. Fukkin bitch. Aww dem souws, but nu speciaw wumps.”

Sonia portals in with the rest of the Monster Party.

“Varney’s flown away. So, did you only wish for one Sun Pearl, or were you not banking on those clouds going away?”

Hunter nods.

“Yuh, aww dem dawkie munstahs went foweba sweepies wen da cwowds went away, an aww da vam-piyahs wan away scweem-in.”

Gizmo proudly gestures at his girlfriend.

“Well, the ones Sonia here didn’t already kill.”

Sonia blushes.

“Don’t sell yourself short, Gizmo, you were actually doing better than me this time.”

Edward lands his Star Chariot, climbing off with Mr. Dragon-Soul, and Chrysus lands, in human form, but with wings.

“FYI, Erebus is toast. But maybe you already saw? Yeah, you’re looking at the dude who did it. We’re gonna need a bigger coffin.”

See, dear readers? You saw Eddy slay Erebus, right? Are you really gonna complain that you didn’t get to see Round Three of Scott versus Deedee?

Is slaying a dragon not awesome enough for you?

Pierre lands his flying car, getting out with Deston, François and Audrey landing next to them.

“The Rider seems to have fled, and he took his bike with him.”

The Helios lands, Victor and Scarface disembarking, helping Nadia, Aurelia, Lorik, Edgar, Dharin, Peter, Alex, Panthera and Nocturne out, Nocturne still in panther form.

Victor’s grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

“We’ve got Shaun tied up in this beauty, and he’s not going anywhere, because he’s not waking up until Des says so.”

pop

Marley, back in fluffy form, teleports in with Nivlac, who is holding the Lamp.

Dehak immediately lunges for it, but I’m faster.

WHAP

I backhand him away.

“Yeah, we undid that wish too. Be grateful you aren’t already trapped inside your staff again. Al, keep an eye on him for me!”

Alpha obliges, walking over with Beta and Gamma, all three of them golden, and I turn to Nivlac.

“The Lamp, please.”

“But I was about to wish for a three-foot–”

Niv.

“I just wanted a hoagie, Cal…”

“I will have Vic make you a hoagie later, Niv! Ya don’t need magic to grant that wish!”

“I know, I was only playin’. Here.”

He tosses the Lamp to me, and I deftly catch it, dropping it in my bag.

“Thanks. And now, Dehak you’ll get the Lamp, as my Dutch pals over there would say, at sint-juttemis, which means never. You can, I believe the saying is, write it on your stomach. Right?”

Sonia and Niek both nod happily.

“You’re really getting the hang of Dutch, Cal!”

Je hebt helemaal gelijk, broer!

“Caw knu mowe Nay-duw-wands den Spacecake knu, an Spacecake wib in da Neffuw-wands.”

“Hey, you’re getting there too, Spacecake!”

Dank-yuh-vew, daddeh.”

TFN has dubs for pretty much every language on Earth, and a few extraterrestrial languages. There’s even a show specifically about teaching fluffies about foreign languages and cultures, in ways they can understand.

Pierre knows how hard it can be to teach a different language to fluffies, but he thinks it’s always worth the effort.

His fluffies are almost at the point that he can hold a conversation in French with them.

But they have an unfair advantage.

Dave and Slayer land, the former taking his phone out, the latter immediately leering at Umbra, licking his lips.

“Boo-way-noh…”

Victor points at Dave.

“Jar! You owe the meme jar two dollars on Slayer’s behalf, Dave!”

“Wait, why TWO dollars–”

“For this offence, and the one he committed earlier!

“Victow sed dat Dave wuz gunna heaw abowt dat.”

Umbra, having managed to extricate himself from his now oversized clothes, sees Slayer leering, and freezes up, his pure red eyes wide.

“No, not you…

Slayer flies at Umbra, who immediately turns tail and flees, running as fast as a fluffy with no Omega power can.

“WET SWAYEW CWAP DOZE CHEEKSIES!!!”

“GET AWAY FROM ME!!!”

Umbra runs towards Seth, who grins, holding his new guitar, Power Gloves on his hands.

Grasping the neck in one hand, Seth pushes a button on the body of the guitar with the other.

SHING

And razor-sharp adamantium axe blades pop out of the guitar.

Seth lifts the guitar-axe up.

“So how’s this for an axe?”

THUNK

He swings the guitar-axe down, embedding one blade in the ground, Umbra screeching to a halt before he slams into it.

Unfortunately for Umbra, that’s when Slayer catches him, and our horny half-demon fluffy pal doesn’t waste any time.

“ENF! ENF! ENF! YUS! FINE-AWWY! ENF! ENF! ENF!”

As Slayer drives it in up to the hilt, Umbra’s eyes widen again.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! CALL HIM OFF!!! MAKE HIM STOP!!!”

I walk over with Dave, trying not to obstruct Dave’s view as he films this.

“Look at you, Umby. It’s like you’re back in the Rape Chamber. So tell me, what’s worse: being in Hell, being inside the Devourer, or this?

“ENF! ENF! ENF!”

“WHY IS HE GOING SO SLOW?!?”

“He likes to take his time. Slayer, you mind reverting to normal form before you finish?”

“ENF! ENF! ENF! Caw nu wan Umbwa tu haf buwnie gud feews? ENF! ENF! ENF!”

“I can’t say he doesn’t deserve that, but we need to keep him alive until we figure out what to do with him.”

Slayer obliges me, reverting to normal.

“ENF! ENF! ENF!”

“ARE YOU SERIOUS, KORKEA?!? YOU’RE NOT JUST GOING TO KILL ME AGAIN?!?”

I shake my head, a big grin on my face.

“Nope. Because if we do that, you’ll either go back to Hell, or back to the Devourer, and we all know how that ends. So this time, I’m completely defying the pattern. I’m bringing you in alive, so we can keep a close eye on you, like Vic meant me to do the first time. Des?”

Deston walks over, a fluffy-sized gold bracelet in his hand.

“Slayer, please hold still for a moment?”

Slayer obliges again, and Deston swiftly places the bracelet on Umbra, casting Varyas around Dave, Slayer and Umbra so the latter can’t run away.

“Thank you. Continue.”

“ENF! ENF! ENF!”

WHYYYYYYYYYY?!?

“ENF! ENF! ENF! YU KNU WAI! ENF! ENF! ENF!”

With Deston keeping an eye on Umbra, and, reluctantly, Slayer, I walk back over to Dehak, and our golden robot pals.

“I’ve got one of those for you too, Dehak.”

Edward, Lorik and Nadia step up, their weapons at the ready, Lorik’s crown back on his head, exactly as I knew it would be.

Because that’s where I told Marley to wish it.

I also told him to wish for it to be cleaned, because Dehak’s kinda grody.

The rightful king glares at the usurper.

“Dehak, you are hereby under arrest for crimes against Drakonia! Unlike you, I strive to be a fair and righteous ruler, so I will see to it that you get a fair trial, no matter how hard it may be to find a lawyer willing to defend you!”

Nadia glares the bastard.

“You devastated my kingdom, killed my subjects, and made me a damsel in distress, and I will never forget that. I’ll be right there when they pass judgement on you, Dehak.”

Panthera steps up with Nocturne.

“And I will be cooperating with Deston, to ensure that you are securely contained.”

“I like my food fresher than this, but I won’t mind taking a bite out of you.”

Dharin steps up with Edgar, using his good arm to draw his sword.

“And if you try to escape, we can still contain you as a severed head!”

“I humbly suggest that you cooperate while you still have all of your body parts.”

Mr. Dragon-Soul steps up, holding some kind of black gem.

“You know what this is, Dehak? This is from my world, but this world has something like these too, I’ve heard. So this should work here. Ah, the look on my face tells me that you know what this does. I could use your soul to enchant a new weapon… or just put it on a shelf. You wouldn’t be lonely. You’d be right next to the bitter farmer who abused his daughters, and the miserable old woman who terrorised the kids in her orphanage.”

Edward grins in a vengeful manner.

“Unless you prefer sharing a tub of maggots with Necrosis? Obviously, the death penalty won’t accomplish anything in the long run, so I think you’re looking at an unlife sentence. Forever is a very long time to be in prison, and that’s your fault. As someone on Earth once said: you do it to yourself, you do, and that’s what really hurts.”

Nadia raises an eyebrow, her crossbows pointed at Dehak.

Who said that, Eddy?”

“Radiohead.”

As Dehak’s eyes dart back and forth, I give him a warning look.

“Don’t think of running away, Dehak. I’ve got the Lamp! I can just wish you back here! Again, be grateful that I don’t just wish your phylactery destroyed! Be grateful that you are still unalive, and learn to fold!”

Dehak sneers at me.

“And why don’t you just wish me gone, boy? Are you scared? Scared of the power that Lamp holds? Scared it might corrupt you? That’s the difference between you and me, boy: I was never scared of the power.”

“And look what that got you.”

Marley waddles over, Nivlac following him.

“Dewe am mowe diff-wens-ess den dat.”

“Here’s another one: you never stopped to think that maybe you AREN’T entitled to use that power however you please.”

“Yeah, it’s just as I told you, we’ve met plenty of people like you. People who believed that might makes right, power is meant to be used, blah blah blah. Heard it a million times.”

François chuckles as he walks over, reverting to human form.

“I can’t lie, I was one of those people.”

Dehak glares at his brother.

“Auldryn! You’ve always been a fraud! I know that robe isn’t real gold, how could you cast spells in it if it was?

I reach into my bag.

“Speaking of…”

“What?”

Before Dehak can react, I slap a gold bracelet on his right wrist.

“And now you don’t even have that option. Boy, this sure is turning out a lot like last time! You thought that you had won, that your reign over Drakonia would go unchallenged, and oh, look what happened, I walked in and dismantled your regime in a day. So does it feel worse the second time?”

François chuckles again, obviously basking in Dehak’s suffering.

“You know, there’s worse fates than killing you or imprisoning you. Perhaps we could simply wish to restore you to life. No more Lord Dehak the Almighty, only Dehstuonn the Ambitious again.”

Then it’s Dehak’s turn to chuckle.

“But have you considered the possibility that I would still be loyal to the Devourer? That I would seek lichdom once more? You could restore me to life. But you still wouldn’t get your brother back. No matter what you do, Auldryn, you will never have your brother back! GET IT IN YOUR HEAD ALREADY!!! DEHSTUONN IS GONE!!!

François is stricken silent, so I speak up next, pretending that I didn’t notice the tear trickling down his cheek.

“Dehak, again, you should be grateful. We don’t usually show mercy to villains like you, and this is mercy, what we’re offering you. You don’t see the value of mercy, but maybe experiencing it first-hand will show you what all the fuss is about. That’s the problem with people like you. You don’t think that maybe the strong shouldn’t brutalize the weak, and you just take it for granted that you’ll always be the former. But now, here you are, no Lamp, no allies, no magic, surrounded by enemies, and what’s the one thing keeping you unalive right now? Can you guess, Dehak?”

The undead bastard stares daggers at me.

“WEAKNESS!!! You’re weak, boy! Too weak to do what you know must be done!”

You’re the weak one. I’m trying to give you a chance, Dehak. I always try to give bad guys a chance to stop being bad. But if you waste it… you’re gonna die.

Then he starts laughing.

“Heh heh heh… ahahahaha… AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”

“What’s so funny, Dehak?”

“You’ve all forgotten something important! I may not have the Lamp anymore, I may be deprived of my magic… but I still have other powers!”

He points a finger up at the clear blue sky.

PEW

His finger blasts a black sphere of energy into the sky, black smoke trailing behind it.

POOF

It explodes into a mass of dark clouds, spreading above us.

Slayer keeps doing his thing to Umbra, both of them disregarding this entirely for similar reasons.

As we watch the clouds spread, Dehak grabs me by the throat with both hands, grinning maliciously down at me as he throttles me.

“I regret to inform you that my previous offer is now off the table. You and all of your friends will die, boy, whether or not you return my Lamp to me. If I cannot rule this land as God-King Dehak, then I will crush it beneath my heel as Lord Dehak the Almighty! If you will not kneel before a king, THEN YOU WILL COWER BEFORE A NECROMANCER!!!”

I smirk up at him, choking out a single word.

Harder.

Everyone gasps.

“Woah!”

“Bro!”

“Nigga, the fuck you just say?!?”

Jesus, hun!”

Dehak’s so surprised he lets go of my neck.

“That’s disgusting, boy–”

WHAM

And then I take advantage of the opening to deck him in the gut so hard he doubles over.

“YOU FELL FOR IT, YOU STUPID SCHMUCK!!!”

Everyone starts laughing, except Slayer, who is too busy enfing to pay attention, and Umbra, who is too busy being enfed.

Dehak gets back up, clutching his gut, staring daggers at me, wheezing in pain.

“Very funny, boy… very funny indeed… but just for that… I’ll give this entire worthless kingdom a slow death.

“And then what? Did you not listen to me earlier? What will you do when Drakonia is destroyed? Will you be happy? Will you feel fulfilled?

He laughs humorlessly.

“I’ll do what I should have done in the beginning! Turn this land into a kingdom of the unliving dead! The living never want to submit to the undead, do you? You think you’re better than us! But it’s so easy to change your minds, and show you the beauty in the morose. And the undead are so much easier to command. You’ll learn to like it, boy. Living as undead, it isn’t so bad. Not if you look up toward the light. From deep within your home under the ground… you’ll find that everything is alright.”

Reggae storms over with Mortis, in full “pissed off zombie rasta” mode.

“Dat easy fa yuh to say, yuh eediat bumbaclot lich! Yuh mek di choice tuh becum undead! Buh wi neva get ah choice!”

“We am zum-bees cuz we wuz in da wong pwace at da wong time!”

“Yeh, o de dat fair? Nuh yuh miss a bi alive? Nuh yuh miss di likkle tings, lakka listening tuh yuh heartbeat eena bed?”

Dehak raises a stringy eyebrow.

“I only understood a few words of that.”

Henry strolls up with Camilla.

“He’s saying that we didn’t get a choice, pal. You chose undeath, but we didn’t. Reggae and Mortis didn’t choose to become zombies, and Carmilla and I didn’t choose to become vampires. We were forced into it.”

“Cawmiwwa had a fyu fings tu say tu Vaw-nee abowt dat.”

“Okay, it’s my fault that you’re a vampire, Carm, so–”

“It am otay, Cawmiwwa nu howd it agains Henwy. It wuz Sah-vee-nee fauwt dat Henwy am a vam-piyah, an it am Vaw-nee fauwt dat dewe am vam-piyahs.”

“Bastard’s probably turning more people as we speak. You know, Dehak, you can extol the virtues of undeath all you want, but, uh, here’s a thought: how about you ask people before you turn them into undead?”

Dehak glares at the two vampires.

“You didn’t ask your shite-rodent, did you? So get off your high horse. Ingrates, all of you. You, bloodsucker, would be dead by now if you weren’t a vampire. You were turned a century ago, yes?”

“I never saw my family again, asshole! I couldn’t show up on the doorstep looking like this! I had to let them think I died in that trench! The grief tore my family apart!”

“You could have just turned them, idiot! Then you’d still have your family!”

“What if they didn’t want to be vampires?!? Didn’t your buddy Varney ever consider that when he started turning people?!?”

“Didn’t you consider that when you turned your shite-rodent? You hypocrite!”

“I did it to save her life–”

“So did Varney! He wanted to grant all of mankind the gifts of unearthly power and eternal life, to save everyone–

“BITCH, WE HAVE WEAKNESSES OUT THE ASS!!! I MISS GARLIC, GODDAMNIT!!! I HAD TO GET A MIRROR WITH ABSOLUTELY ZERO SILVER IN IT JUST SO I CAN SHAVE IN THE MORNING!!! DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD SHAVING IS WHEN YOU CAN’T SEE YOUR REFLECTION?!? AND IF I WASN’T WEARING A SUN PEARL, I WOULD BE ASH RIGHT NOW!!! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH I MISSED GOING TO THE BEACH?!? THE BEACH SUCKS AT NIGHT!!! OH, AND SPEAKING OF THINGS THAT SUCK, THEN THERE’S THE WHOLE HAVING TO DRINK BLOOD TO STAY UNALIVE THING!!! AND IT TOOK A THOUSAND YEARS BEFORE VAMPIRES HAD ANOTHER WAY!!! THE LIVING MAY NOT LIVE AS LONG AS US, BUT AT LEAST THEY DIDN’T HAVE TO COMMIT A FELONY WITH EVERY MEAL!!! IT’S REALLY HARD TO STAY UNALIVE WHEN YOU HAVE TO PISS OFF THE PEOPLE WHO KNOW ALL OF YOUR WEAKNESSES TO FEED YOURSELF!!!”

“Only if you’re weak. The vampires could overwhelm the Association with sheer numbers, if you wanted it. Varney has heard of the Morris Clan, you know, and he thinks you’re a disgrace to his kind.”

“So did Ianos, and look what fuckin’ happened to him.”

“Bah! Be silent, little shadow.”

“Um, I thought little shadow was MY nickname–”

Dehak whips around, pointing at Nivlac.

“You are all little shadows! You, dark boy, the vampires, the draaks, the Klyntar, you are all little shadows! Pale reflections of the Ur-Darkness, the first and worst foe of humans and shite-rodents alike! The dark in the cave, the shadow in the trees, the progenitor of all things that go bump in the night! Have you ever heard of the primal scream? That was at my master! Their power flows through all beings whom dwell in darkness, including you! And including ME!!! The greatest servant the Devourer will ever have!”

“Eh, the bar’s not really set that high–”

Still thy tongue, dark boy. Your turn to talk is over.

Then Dehak turns back to me, smiling.

“So what’s it going to be, boy? I’m afraid that there is no longer any path leading to victory for you. There are only several paths leading to defeat. Whether or not I get my precious Lamp back doesn’t really matter anymore. You will all still die.”

“We outnumber you, stupid.”

Marley cracks a grin.

“Yuh, Umbwa nu can hewp yu!”

I quickly glance over at Slayer and Umbra.

“ENF! ENF! ENF!”

“STOOOOO-HOOOOO-HOOOOOP!!!”

Then I turn back to Dehak.

“And you need an arcane circle to summon more Darklings, right? I don’t see one around here. So you’ve got nobody backing you up now.”

Dehak clenches his right fist, thrusting it into the air.

DARK LIGHTNING!!! STRIKE AT ME NOW!!!

KRA-KA-KOOM

A black lightning bolt strikes Dehak, sending everyone close to him flying.


As we get back up, we see Dehak, floating off the ground, his body crackling with black electricity, the fragments of the golden bracelet on the ground.

He grins wildly at me as he sweeps his arms around him, flexing his fingers.

“I didn’t want to do this, boy. The toll will be heavy. But if I can get my Lamp back, the toll can be paid with ease!”

Black lines appear on the ground below him, rapidly forming into a gigantic arcane circle, like big invisible pens are drawing them.

A big version of the circles spotted across the kingdom.

“There’s a reason I usually make my arcane circles the slow way. But desperate times call for desperate measures! DARK WINDOW!!!

KRRRK

And a massive black portal opens, hordes of Darklings crawling out.

Dehak laughs, spreading his arms wide.

“My Darklings! Here are your orders!”

He points at me.

“KILL THE BOY!!! RETRIEVE THE LAMP IF YOU CAN!!!”

Then he points at Nivlac.

“KILL HIS OBNOXIOUS DARK SIDE!!!”

Then he points at Marley.

“KILL THE SHITE-RODENT!!!”

Then he points at Judy.

“KILL THE WITCH WHO THINKS SHE’S A WIZARD!!!”

Then he gestures around at everyone else.

“AND KILL ANYONE WHO GETS IN YOUR WAY!!!”

The Darklings obey, and as they rush us, we immediately move to fight back, sounding out the battle cry.

“ONE FOR ALL!!!”

“AN AWW FOW WUN!!!”

Part 9

1 Like