The Smarty Collar(tm)! - by anon63414782

Is your beloved fluffy suddenly acting up?

“Dummeh daddeh, nu wan’ dummeh kibbew! Wan’ sketties!”

Are conventional disclipinary tools such as sorry sticks and boxes proving ineffective?

“My fluffy, Bluebell, began exhibiting symptoms associated with smarty syndrome and I just didn’t know what to do. If I hit him with the sorry stick, or put him in a sorry box it would improve behavior for maybe a day at best before he began acting up again!”

It is a sad, but true fact that hundreds of thousands of pet fluffies are afflicted with smarty syndrome each year. Commonly, people are told that there is no viable cure, and putting your beloved pet fluffy down is the only option.

NOT ANYMORE

Introducing the Smarty Collar™!

The Smarty Collar™ is a revolutionary new device, which not only remedies, but also prevents smarty behavior in your beloved pets!

How does it work? It’s easy!

Simply attach the collar to your fluffy, and sync it up to your smartphone or other handheld device!

Inbuilt microphones listen in on what your fluffy is saying, and if it recognizes a bad word being said…

ZAP!

The device delivers a painful, but harmless(*) electric shock to your fluffy, immediately curbing negative behaviour before it can be carried out! Using the companion app, you can even modify the voltage according to your preferences!

The device comes with a set of pre-registered “bad words” which will trigger the shock, such as:

“Dummeh”
“Wan’ sketties!”
“Sowwy poopies!”
And more!

In addition, you can configure the list according to your preferences using the companion app installed on your synced device! So even if your fluffy is merely acting up, and not a smarty, it can still function as a disciplinary device!

Here’s some testimonial from just one of our many satisfied customers!

“At first I thought the Smarty Collar™ was just some new gimmick, but I’ve been using it for a year now and my fluffy couldn’t be more well behaved! Isn’t that right, Sunshine?”

“Yus, daddeh! Nu wan’ be smawty no mowe!”

The device can even be used on new or expectant mothers exhibiting signs of Bitch Mare Syndrome! Either purchase the Bitch Mare Collar™, or configure your already existing Smarty Collar™ according to your needs!

So what are you waiting for? You can order a brand new Smarty Collar™ online, or by visting one of our many BetterFluff stores located all over the country!

*Electric shocks have been known to cause side effects such as: impaired cognitive function, nervous system damage, cardiovascular damage, sudden death, spontaneous combustion, and incontinence. Please consult a veterinarian before use.

23 Likes

Forgot your name in the title

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Nice

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Very well put together

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The collar would work well in a story where a fluffy owner uses it on a misbehaving fluffy. Behavior improves but the owner doesn’t read up on side effects so the fluffy will continue to suffer.

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Very nice. A story of a fluffy subjected to this would be a great follow-up.

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Ooh this I enjoyed this.

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Spontaneous combustion :joy:

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