A quick personal foreword
Hello everyone, it’s been quite a while. I cannot express how glad I am to see that the community is well and alive. I had to take a break due to my university course load and too much abuse leading to violent intrusive thoughts regarding my cat (who I love very much and would never harm but still). I think I developed a sort of addiction to violent abuse and that led me to specific thinking patterns. Anyways I’m better now and well on my road to recovery from my main addiction. I hope to be able to contribute to the community and entertain you with interesting stories just like how you all do. Thank you for reading this and for the religious among you; god bless.
The fluffy craze spread quickly and virulently throughout the first world. Children of all walks of life fell in love with the talking, thinking “animals” Hasbio had developed. And who could blame them? They were like the mix between a pet and a child, and that made them popular not only with children but with young adults especially, those who wanted children but couldn’t afford them or did not have their own house yet.
Regardless of the reasons fluffies were everywhere and it was only a matter of time until they found their way into earth’s many ecosystems whether by escape, most often cause by baby fever or willingly abandoned by their owners. Soon there were fluffies everywhere outside.
Everywhere? No! One province of inveterate Canadians still and forever resisted to the biotoy invaders. And life was not easy for the fluffy herds outside it’s borders.
You see Alberta had a longstanding and proud history of being the only place in the world that was rat-free. Task forces of trained dogs patrolled it’s borders and strict health and safety guidelines made it so that any population could not thrive. And with the fluffy craze, the province was determined to make itself fluffy free as well.
At first a ban on all fertile fluffies was proposed, then one forcing all males to be castrated, however with the fluffy lobby of both fluffy rights advocates and breeders the province relented and came to a compromise: A fluffy registry where all fluffies needed to be catalogued and accounted for. Anyone caught underreporting the number of foals in a litter or freeing fluffies into the environment whether it be willingly or not, would face a heavy fine. For this reason GPS collars were particularly popular causing fluffmarts around the province to have an entire row of shelves dedicated to them.
This all leads us to the protagonist of our story: Jeremy, a 3rd year university student living alone in a small bungalow named Jeremy. Being a student meant he had little time for friends or family and he didn’t feel like a pet would give him the connection he needed to get out of his lonely hole. So he decided he would get a fluffy.
Jeremy walked to the train station and boarded a train to downtown to go to the biggest fluffmart in the city, one that existed on a former supermarket. As he entered the fluffmart he was assaulted by the chatter of hundreds of fluffies all staying in elevated glass pens that weren’t too disimilar to the ones you would find for hamsters in a pet store.
“May I help you?” A short brunette with a pony tail approached him as soon as he set foot into the store
“Um, yes. I am looking to adopt a fluffy” He replied somewhat timidly
“Great! Is this your first fluffy or are you an experienced owner?” She asked
“No I’m completely new to fluffies. I want one I can converse with and raise but one that’s not too high maitenance either as I am a student and I work” Jeremy answered.
“Sure thing! Now I would recomend either a unicorn or an earthy as alicorns are more on the expensive side and pegasi are very energetic and need more attention than others. Do you have a preference on color?” The employee asked
Jeremy hesitated for a moment, he did have his favorite color: blue but he wasn’t getting a fluffy for aesthetic purposes. “No not really, I just want one that intelligent and affectionate.” He replied
“Hmm, give me a moment to look at our charts and i’ll see if I can find a few that fit those criteria. Feel free to take a look around the pens in the meanwhile” The woman with the pony tail said before setting off to the employee only area of the store.
Jeremy decided to approach one of the pens while waiting. Inside there was a purple pegasus adult sleeping with 7 foals running and playing about in the pen. There was a red earthie playing with blocks, two yellow foals, one pegasus and one unicorn playing tag with each other, a black unicorn trying to climb up the wall, a blue pegasus passing a ball to a green earthie, and finally a brown pegasus who was huddled up in a tunnel.
Jeremy approached his hand to the tunnel and the foal immediately withdrew with a loud EEP! and a loud fart as it shat itself. That woke the purple pegasus up.
“Babeh! Wha am wong?” the adult pegasus asked as she ran up to the tunnel
The brown foal hid it’s face under it’s hooves and weakly pointed towards Jeremy while shivering
“Meanie mistah! Wha am du to bwown babeh?” The purple pegasus walked up to Jeremy and began stomping it’s hooves in anger
“I didn’t do anything I just placed my hand in front of it that’s all!” Jeremy replied indignantly
“Ou scawed babeh! Take sowwy poopies!” The pegasus turned around and lowered its front legs to give itself the angle to shit on Jeremy, lucky for him the glass enclosure’s walls were two feet tall and the poop only landed on the glass.
“Celestia!” The lady with the ponytail exclaimed. “What are you doing?” She said as she rushed over to the enclosure.
“Miws Lwisa! Dat meanie hooman scawe baby!” The fluffy replied trying to defend itself
“I just placed my hand in front of the tunnel to see how that brown one was doing, I didn’t mean to scare it. Honest!” Jeremy said now trying to defend himself
The woman sighed and shrugged. “I’ll clean it up later. You should know better than to suddenly approach a sensitive foal.” She picked up the purple pegasus and did her best not to get any shit on her clothes. “And you Celestia, you should know better than to give sorry poopies, especially to a nice mister who might want to adopt one of your foals! Now come on i’ll clean you up.” She left with the fluffy in hand leaving Jeremy alone in front of the pen, feeling somewhat responsible for the ordeal.
All the foals had stopped playing and were now staring at him.
“Ou meanie hooman, you make mummah go away! Take sowwy poopies” One of the yellow foals turned around to try and shit on Jeremy but was bonked on the head by the red foal.
“Dummeh! Nu am fawlt poopie babeh get scawdies, poopie babeh am weak. Nice mistah am stwong. Dat natuwe!”
HMP! The yellow foal pouted as it rubbed its head with its hoof, whispering “Dummeh bwudda” before trotting off sneering at him.
“Sowwy fo dummeh sissies and poopie babeh nice mistah. Deh nu undewstand. Am ou hewe to be nyu daddeh?” The red foal said, now sitting with it’s tail wagging
“Well yes I am, I’m looking for a fluffy to take home.”
“Yay! Pwease pick fwuffy! Fwuffy wan go to nyu housie an get skettis an be biggest bestest fwuffy fo nice mistah” the red earthie said excitedly standing on its hind legs
“You’re not gonna poop on me are ya?” Jeremy asked as he reached in to pick up the foal, still unsure of whether it was safe to do so concerning his current experience with fluffies
“Nu. Fwuffy nevah gib sowwy poopies, dat am bad, dat am wha weak fwuffy do when nu can gib stompies ow bitsies”
Jeremy picked up the foal and brought it to eye level, he rubbed the earthies stomach with his index
Hehehe! “Dat am tiwkles!” The foal said which put Jeremy much more at ease
“Whats your name little guy?”
“Fwuffy nu hab namesies. Nyu daddeh gib namesies if take fwuffy home”
“Well you’re cute and you seem to have a good head on your shoulders. I think i’ll call you… Nietzsche”
“Yay! Fwuffy wub nyu namesies. Am gonna be bestest stwongest fwuffy fo nyu daddeh!”
Jeremy spent the next few minutes playing with Nietzsche, helping him stack blocks and playing passing the ball to him. All the while the other foals were huddled up where the purple pegasus was sleeping, trying to make the most of the warmth that remained there.
“Dummeh bwudda aways meanies to bwown babeh and gib sowwy hoofsies, an he get to hab nyu daddeh. Nu faiw!” The bonked yellow pegasus said.
“Bwudda am nee leawn lesson!” The black unicorn said
“Yus gib sowwy poopies and sowwy hoofsies!” The blue pegasus added
The lady came back from the backroom of the fluffmart with a couple charts and talked to Jeremy: “So I went through the profiles of all our foals and I found a few that could be a good match for you”
“I don’t think that will be necessary I think I found one I like right here” He said presenting Nietzsche proudly.
“I see…well if you’ve made up your mind I can help you get all the acessories and toys you will need. You can leave him in the pen so he can say goodbye to his siblings and I’ll put a little ribbon around his neck to make sure no-one else takes him.” The ponytailed lady said “If you’ll follow me we can pick up all the essentials”
Jeremy nodded and put Nietzsche back in the pen. “I’ll be back for you in a minute buddy, say goodbye to your siblings and ill be right back”. He turned to the employee “What about his mom?”
“Oh! Right she’s still in the bath, i’ll dry her off quickly and bring her back.” She handed Jeremy a piece of paper. “Here’s a list of all the essentials, you can pick them out while I go dry Celestia” she said before rushing back to the employee only area.
Jeremy felt really happy and began to pick out the much needed essentials, however back at the pen things were not so happy.