John Doe is walking down the street. He’s just an average guy. An ordinary dude. He’s usually even-tempered on most days, but today he’s in a peculiar sort of mood. Something must be about to happen. He can feel it.
Suddenly, something does happen. A fluffy mummah’s voice cries out from an alleyway-
“Nuu! Poopeh babbeh!”
John Doe hears those words. Poopie baby. Holy shit. His dick grows three more inches at the thought of the righteous violence he’s about to inflict on this fucking cunt of a fluffy mare he’s stumbled upon. He picks up his pace as he approaches the alleyway. A splatter of color against gray concrete is just up ahead.
At first, as he gets closer, all he sees is the round, dirty backside of a stray fluffy mare. She’s bubblegum pink with a powder blue mane and tail. It drags behind her on the concrete, tangled and matted.
The mare is of course surrounded by a litter of brightly colored foals. They’re all making grossed-out faces, blowing little angry raspberries in the same direction their mummah is facing.
John Doe can now also see the tiny brown backside of another foal. And what a surprise! The foal’s face is planted in a pile of fluffy shit. Mummah fluffy is stamping a padded hoof on the concrete as she stands over it. The mare’s voice is angry, and now John is angry too. He decides he’s going to do some ‘stamping’ of his own.
First things first: it’s time for the Bad Uppies!
The mare screeches and flails around as John picks her up roughly by the mane. Her brightly colored litter starts frantically chirping and peeping in fear, scrambling and scuttling around John’s feet like he just turned on the light in a basement full of cockroaches. A small red colt gets crushed underfoot by accident, but John forgives himself for the error. Would have probably grown up into one of those ‘smarty’ stallions he’d heard about anyway.
“You dumb bitch! Stop screaming!” John shakes the mare around, making her dizzy.
“P-pwease!” The mare begs, tears streaming down her face. She’s trying not to choke as the world shakes violently around her.
“Nu hu hu-huwt gud mu-mmah’s babbehs! Dey-huh- am on-nwy! Wuh-widd-we b-bab-!”
“I said shut up!” John screams in her tiny, terrified face. The mare pisses herself. The frantic peeping of her brood underneath them only makes her struggle more, and she continues to flail about, flinging piss droplets everywhere. It rains down on the chirpies below and their crying only gets louder.
“Pwease!” The mare is screaming again.
John tosses her to the ground, and she lands right on top of another foal. A powder blue unicorn wheezes as the air is crushed out of its teeny tiny lungs, one little leg waggling uselessly out from underneath its now dazed mother.
John feels no sympathy for this foal either. It wasn’t face deep in shit like its sibling, was it? Who cared if it died?
The mummah mare had finally stopped begging. Instead she merely sobbed as the remnants of her brood tried desperately to hide underneath her fluff. All except for the ‘poopie babbeh’, who was still face deep in the pile of shit. John noted that it was still breathing, so he returned to his attention to the mare. He raised his foot over her, ready to bring brutal justice down.
“This is for your ‘poopie babbeh’, bitch.”
The mare realized forever sleepies were headed her way, and she wailed up at the sky.
“Hu hu huuu! Why poopeh babbeh no dwink miwkies?! Why do dis to gud mummah?! Why get owwies? Huhuu, onwy wan aww pwetty babbehs to dwink miwkies and gwow up big an’ stwomg!”
John rolled his eyes. Did this little bitch seriously think she could still talk her way out of this? What a joke. He knew fluffies were fucking dumb, but man.
But… something still made him pause. He looked back at the poopie baby once more.
It was still in the diminishing shit pile, munching away. It was munching fast. It was munching the shit… excitedly?
Suddenly, John felt ill. He realized that the little foal’s tail was wagging. Its face finally came up, and its muzzle was covered in a literal shit-eating grin.
“Wub poopies! Poopies am bes’es nummies!” the foal told John, somehow oblivious to his sobbing mother and crushed siblings piled on the ground right beside him. He immediately shoved his face back in the pile of shit, snorting and slurping away at it.
“What the fuck?” John gagged. Instead of stomping in the mummah’s skull as planned, he kicked the still-wailing mare out from underneath his feet. The fluffy rolled tits-over-head down the pavement, landing in a trash-filled corner. Her remaining foals hurriedly ran after her, begging her not to leave them behind with the munstah hoomin! All of them except for the oblivious shit-eater.
John brought his foot up again, this time bringing it down hard on the brown foal, crushing it flat. Feces and blood immediately splattered out from under the sole of his shoe.
“Fuck! Disgusting shitrats.” he muttered under his breath. He heard a gasp from behind him, making him jerk around. An elderly woman was standing there with a horrified expression, taking in the whole shitshow in front of her.
John awkwardly cleared his throat.
“Uh. It was an accident. I uh, didn’t see it. In the shit.” he said, lamely.
The horrified expression didn’t leave the woman’s face. She didn’t say anything, just stared at him. John slowly backed out of the alley before he bolted away, leaving bloody, shitty footprints behind him.
