Braden waddled down Front Street. He was on the hunt for open doors.
“Wub tu wawk aww wound housie pwaces, haftu fin nyu howsie fow pway in!” The rotund orange unicorn trotted along, his bright purple mane trailing behind him as he approached a home with a dog door.
The flap was hidden, but the homeowner got too creative and tried to disguise it as part of a kids toychest. This simply drew the curious little fluff in. “Toysies? Hooway! Bwaden wub tu pway!” As the fluffy opened the toychest, however, he saw that it was empty, and the front flopped open when weight was put on the floor. It formed a sort of Dog Garage.
To celebrate solving this Myst-like puzzle, Braden shit a stream that was about 80% liquid with just enough sold matter to gum up the door mechanism the homeowner had spent so much time and money rigging. “Gud poopies! Bwaden feew much betta nao!” Happily, he waddled in through the dog flap.
Normally, a fluffy would know to be afraid of dogs. Some might even recognize a dog door. Not Braden. He came across the slumbering old hound immediately upon entering the house. “Hewwo? Nyu fwend? Bawky munstah wan pway?” The dog roused from slumber for a moment before deciding the fluffy wasn’t a threat and going back to sleep. At 19 years old, his days of shredding fluffies are long past.
Braden, disappointed at his new friend’s unwillingness to join in, waddled further into the house. As he passed through the laundry room where the dog slept, he found himself in a kitchen. “Nummies pwace?” He cried, astounded. “Bwaden wub nummies awmost as much as pway! Nummies time!” The excited little scamp started tearing open drawers and cabinets, finding all kinds of candies and sweets. The homeowners were old, and kept a lot of pre-prepared food around for when the arthritis flared up. This meant a minimum of yucky ingredients for good Braden.
He tore through an entire box of Oreos before tearing open all the cereal bags to see the “pwetty cowows” and roll around in them. He made sorry poopies all over the front of the front of the fridge when it made a noise, but upon opening it he found even more nummies!
“Sowwy fow poopies nummy fwend! Nu knu bout aww dese nummies!” He had to discard some gross nummies in meanie pokey needles that said “MUST REFRIGERATE” but behind them was ketchup so he just ate that. “Puddin? Dewe chokwit puddin! Yay!”
Satisfied he’d eaten all the pudding, Braden proceeded to the living room. The fireplace was off, and resting before it was a triangle with pretty colors! Red and white stripes and even a blue part with some white stars! “Suuu pweeeeety!” Braden tried to play with the pretty cloth, but he couldn’t. There was a picture of a young hoomin daddeh in a siwwy hat on it, but there was glass in the way too!
Naturally, Braden gave the triangle wowstesy hoofie stompies until it broke. He carefully avoided the sharp owwie glass and drug the pretty cloth out with his teefies.
He then ran around the living room and hallways, streaming the pretty blankie behind him. He even made excited poopies everywhere! What a good day.