Be Elvira
you are watching the magic portrait
the fool and his great beast have managed to escape the monstrosity by dressing in strange garments
and preforming a series of ritual actions
though you like the part where they decapitate their foes and turn them into humans
you still like this part best
then you here a noise
could it be?
it is…
the gods have returned!
Matt, though he did not seem happy to see you
not mad
just sort of neutral
you are below his concern
but also below his hate
it is an odd feeling
you are safe yet to this mighty being you are absolutely nothing
then the door opens, Mother and Father enter the room
they have come bearing gifts
a bag of kibble and one of the wonder spheres known simply as ball
you rush up to the barrier that keeps you in your home as they slowly approach you
they stroke your head and tell you that you have not sinned in their eyes
you have defecated in the box of foulness
and braved it’s horrid stench
you ask that you may receive upsies to affirm their covenant with you
that as long as you obey they shall provide for you
you nuzzle into your father’s chest as his hands activate what you assume must be tantric pressure points with his impossibly dexterous appendages
truly this is good
Mother says you have a surprise
She says that you will have a friend
but that you must be cordial and kind to her.
another of your time?
it has been an eternity and even then it was fleeting!
They took you upon their great chariot to a land where others of your kind frolicked in a field as the most heavenly music played.
you hear chirping as mother lowers her hand
they have brought you a child
you praise and thank them
for by their mystic doings they have made you a mother without the pain of biggest poopies!
she puts the baby down and you freeze
what you see before you is an abomination
a creature whose small size belies the unnatural terror it stokes in your breast
though it’s form resembles yours with it’s rotund body and wings there is something wrong
it takes you a bit as your nervous system has become aware before your nous
it is a horn…
you stare at the creature in utter shock
you could flee
but where
and did not your masters appreciate your bravery
no running was not an answer
you must stand your ground
your first instinct is to kill
rip it’s head off like the great hero of the orange ascott
crush the thing while it is small so it may not be a blight upon fluffykind
no the masters have decreed you must not harm it
maybe it is a test
so that you may stamp out evil no matter what
yet why, matt is the giver of tests
the cosmic jester who treats and torments you
they have not once lied to you
and you would rather die than disobey them
you look at the creature once more as it feebly crawls towards you peeping
it’s name is Marmalade
your fear melts as it continues to peep at you expectantly
though it is a monster it has not committed any crimes
it is still innocent
and should be given a chance at life?
would it not be the heroic thing to do to teach it right from wrong
so that it could use it’s immense power to fight the wicked and defend the innocent
for is it not the greatest triumph over the forces of darkness to take it’s soldiers and bring them to light when there was still a chance
this thing may be a monster
but now it is your monster
and for some reason you do not wish to part with it as you pull the creature closer to you
no for though it is hideous it is kind and good
it did not ask to be what it is
and you shall die to defend it
Be Louis
you are watching your fluffy Elvirahug the Alicorn foal you found on the street
she was a little apprehensive at first and you were worried she’d reject it
but they already seem inseparable
hell she’s singing the mummah song already
she can’t provide much milk now but there’s supplements
god those two are cute
sometimes you wish you were that carefree
