||||||| The prequel to Repentance Room no one was asking for |||||||
Jim was excited; Fluffy TV was here to film the fluffies in his street. Though it was only a minor documentary it could be his first step towards stardom. Eventually the presenter Bill Billson came to his house.
“I understand you also have some fluffies.”
“That’s right Bill,” Jim said gesturing to the fenced area attached to the table behind him, “here you can see Daisy and his 3 foals.”
“And how are you raising them?”
“Well Daisy used to belong to a family that had a mare and 5 foals however due to a traffic accident the mare and 2 foals were run over. So I use a small wheel and shouting to cause him to freak out and cry uncontrollably.”
“Can you demonstrate this?”
“Of course.”
Jim then picked up a wheel the size of Daisy and started rolling it around the table.
“Danger, danger! The wheel is going to get you!” screamed Jim.
“Ah ah ah,” shouted the panicking Daisy who then started running away from the wheel with the 3 foals all running in different directions; pissing and shitting as they ran. Jim then chased after Daisy with the wheel and the only reason the fluffies didn’t run off the table was due to the fence being securely nailed to it.
When Jim felt that the camera has recorded enough of Daisy running into the fence he put the wheel back on the ground. After Daisy realise the wheel was gone he collapsed into a heap and started crying.
“Spewial fwend, wan spewial fwend back.”
The 3 foals then moved towards their father and tried to comfort him with ‘huggies’ and ‘wuv’.
“I’m surprised he ran so much without you hitting him with the wheel.”
“It’s all due to my training. Initially I had to hit him with the wheel to make him run but now just seeing it makes run until he collapses.”
“Is that why they’re all so thin?”
“No it’s because I only feed them after they complete a 100-piece jigsaw puzzle.”
“And what do you need them?”
“My special recipe; hog shit and syringes.”
“Fascinating. I hope you fluffies at home are listening carefully to this. A life of starvation and abuse will be your punishment if you run away from home.”
“I challenge anyone to find fluffies who have suffered more,” said Jim.
“Feeding fluffies orally is so passé. The true abuser only feeds them anally.”
Bill and Jim turned to see Jim’s next door neighbour Steve. Jim hated the stupid way Steve randomly emphasised words.
“Take Fraud for example,” he said gesturing to the bloated pink mare waddling around. “Using my patented butt plug I can constantly give her faecal enemas while ensuring that not a single drop leaks out.”
“How long have you been doing this?”
“One month. Though I suppose I could demonstrate my technique for you.”
“That would be great. You can never have enough acts of abuse to teach fluffies why they should never leave home.”
“Well as the owner of the most miserable fluffies I try to do my part.”
“I’ve seen worse,” said Jim, annoyed once again Steve and his wretched inventions had stolen the spotlight from him.
“I doubt it. These are fluffies who cannot be cheered up,” replied Steve.
While Steve was preparing the enema Jim stormed back inside his house. He’s show Steve exactly how to make those fluffies happy.
When Jim returned Bill Billson has already moved to another house.
“Hey Steve you said these fluffies can’t become happy.”
“Of course they can’t.”
“Then I guess you won’t mind me giving them this huge bowl of sketties.”
Jim held the spaghetti in the cheap plastic bowl over the fence. Fraud waddled towards them.
“Wan sketti, but poopie place so full, but wan sketti.”
“You can’t give her food orally. I need her stomach to atrophy so there’s more room to expand her intestines.”
Steve grabbed the bowl, and he and Jim wrestled with it until the contents flew out of the bowl and down the street.
“And who is this?” asked Bill.
“This is Woeful Waffle,” replied Janice. “He spent over a year in the pet store waiting to be adopted and when I chose him he thought he was going to be put to sleep. He simply couldn’t understand that he’s been chosen over another fluffy.”
“I bet that made him happy.”
“Unfortunately adopting a fluffy with bad colours can cause them to feel joy. The trick is to buy a tank and have the clerk half fill it with water. Then you put the fluffy inside and they remain miserable until you can get them home.”
“And what did you do when you got him home?”
“I used a combination of unstackable blocks, itchy carpets, tasteless food, and replacing all the grass with green Velcro to ensure he never enjoyed a single day. Now look at him. He’s incapable of even smiling.”
Bill and Janice then turned towards Waffle. Janice gasped.
“He’s not sad at all. He’s got a huge pile of sketties,” said Bill.
“No! He’s experiencing happiness!” screamed Janice as she picked up the spaghetti, then dropped it because it was so hot.
“We can’t show a fluffy eating a good meal while smiling, it will give the wrong impression to all the fluffies watching the show.”
“Who gave my fluffy sketties!?” shouted Janice.
Having been following the flying food both Jim and Steve were starting nearby Janice. Jim then used all his talent at blaming others for his poor life choices.
“He did it,” Jim said pointing at Steve.
Janice than ran at Steve swinging her hand bag and shouting “You ruined my fluffy”, while he fled down the street.
A clear victory thought Jim as he walked back to his house. On the way he looked into Steve’s garden and saw Fraud licking the sauce from that plastic bowl. Jim then decided that now was a good time to get back at Steve even more. He picked up Fraud and headed back to where Daisy was still on the table.
“For being such good fluffies you’re going to get a special meal.”
“Is meaw sketties?” asked Daisy hopefully.
“It’s shit without syringes.”
With that Jim removed the buttplug and slapped Fraud on her belly. He then learned the important life lesson that enemas are a liquid not a solid. He first realised his mistake when Fraud’s torrent of diarrhoea hit the table, then bounced of it, and went over everything else.
“Ah, ah,” said Jim has he tried to point the anus of this fluffy away from the table. Unfortunately the next target was his fence, which just caused the torrent of shit to become a cone that spread over an even larger area. Finally being able to aim the fluffy so this shit went into Steve’s garden. Jim held Fraud like this until he was sure that she wasn’t going to poop any more.
Though he could feel a heartbeat, meaning the mare was somehow still alive Jim didn’t want to deal with it any longer, so he threw her into a bush in Steve’s garden.
“Babbehs wewe are Babbehs,” said Daisy frantically searching the piles of poop for his foals.
Jim however didn’t care about this. Wet and smelling awful he decided to go back into his house to shower and change his clothes.
||||||| This story was based on a Viz comic about a guy and his Suffering Snakes. It also featured Worms of Woe and possibly Miserable Maggots owned by 2 other people. |||||||