The fallen leaves tell a story.
The great Elden Ring shattered.
In our home, across the fog, the Lands Between.
What tha fwuff am daddeh doin’?
Dunno, daddeh bein’ weiwd 'gain.
Now, Queen Marika the Eternal is nowhere to be found, and in the Night of the the Black Knives,
Godwyn the Golden was the first to perish.
Wai Mawika get nyu namesies?
Mawenia nu kno, jus daddeh bein’ weiwd pwobabwy.
Soon, Marika’s offspring, demigods all, claimed the shards of the Elden Ring.
Mawika hab babbehs?
Nu Wadan, daddeh bein’ weiwd.
AHEM, can i continue?
Yesh daddeh
Mawenia am su tiwed ob dese poopies.
ignore.jpeg
ANYWAY, where was i?
Sumfin abou’ mawika babbehs habin Ewden Wing fingies
oh yeah, ahem
The mad taint of their newfound strength triggered the Shattering.
A war from which no lord arose.
A war leading to abandonment by the Greater Will.
What am gweater wiww?
Nu tawk Wadan, ow daddeh am gonna want again
Oh, arise now, ye Tarnished.
Ye dead, who let live.
Nu wike foweba sweepies tawnish!
Wadan if ou’ keep tawkin’ Mewania wiww take ou’ stuffy fwen.
Nu take Weonawd fwen!
The call of long-lost grace speaks to us all.
Hoarah Loux, chieftain of the badlands.
The ever-brilliant Goldmask.
Fia, the Deathbed companion.
The loathsome Dung Eater.
Eww, poopie nummew.
Wadan mewania sweaw to sky daddeh one mowe wowd an’ Mewania take Weonawd and put Weonawd in wittabawks.
And Sir Gideon Ofnir, the All-Knowing.
…and one other. Whom grace would again bless.
A Tarnished of no renown.
Cross the fog, to the Lands Between, to stand before the Elden Ring.
And become the Elden Lord
FWUFFIN’ FINAWWY!
Huuhuu meanie Mewania no put Weonawd in wittabawks, nu am poopies!
You guys just don’t care, do you?
Nu, nawt weally, Mewania am onwy hewe cuz she nee’ be hewe.
sniff Nu weally, wan Weonawd.