Marigold and the Good Fluffy Ride
>As a kid, you remember going to Disney World with your parents.
>It was just about the best thing of ever.
>Rides, shops, parades, pretty much everything was magical, awesome, and unforgettable.
>And now it’s your turn to be the parent.
>You’re taking Marigold, your green and yellow pegasus fluffy, to Spaghetti Land.
>It’s been advertised as the ultimate land of fluffy enchantment and entertainment.
>Marigold was raring to go as soon as she saw the commercial.
>”Daddy! Daddy! Wan go Sketti Wand!”
>She was practically vibrating in your lap, where she would usually lay still and let you pet her as you both watched TV.
>MLP, obviously. Shit be dank, season 6 is the best one so far.
>And not just because Rarity, your waifu, is all over the place.
>You explained to her that it wasn’t going to open for a few months. She didn’t know how long that was, nor could she count that high.
>But she knew what a day was, so you counted off how many days it would be off of her hooves.
>She giggled each time you booped one of her soft little hooves.
>After more than a few boop rotations, she got the message that Spaghetti Land was a ways off.
>”Can Mawigowd go when Sketti Wand open?”
>Well, why not. You have some vacation time, and Marigold is such a sweet little girl. Still…
>”Well, I don’t know…”
>You never got anything that easy as a kid, why should she?
>”Pweaaaaaaaaaase, daddy? Mawigowd be good fwuffy! Wuv daddeh!”
>She’s desperately hugging your chest and looking up at you with those big fluffy eyes.
>Not fair, that cuteness could be weaponized.
>”I tell you what, if you’re a good little girl from now on, I’ll take you.”
>Marigold’s eyes light up like a Christmas tree. She opens her mouth to squeal in delight.
>You hold up a finger. She shuts her mouth. Holding up a finger is your signal that you want her to be quiet.
>”But you have to be a good little fluffy, OK? No making poopies outside the box, no leaving your toys around the house, no complaining about your food, no staying up past your bedtime. Alright?”
>She nods vigorously, then pounces on you to hug you some more. “Wuv daddeh! Best daddeh!”
>Three months later, you and Marigold are taking your first steps into Spaghetti Land.
>Marigold kept her promise to be good. In fact, she was absolutely perfect. She’d always put her toys away back in her play box after she was done. She never said anything about the food you gave her, even when it was stuff she hated (like cucumber). And every night at bedtime she’d be tucked in to her bed, snoozing right on time.
>You’re amazed a fluffy could display such self control, so you decided she earned the best weekend of her life.
>Deluxe package. All rides, all you can eat ticket, discounts at the shops, etc.
>Expensive as hell, but worth it.
>After all, she is your precious little thing.
>Marigold looks like she’s about to burst with sheer excitement.
>As you step past the entrance onto Fluffy Street, you and Marigold’s eyes are immediately drawn to the massive pile of spaghetti plopped down right in the middle of the park.
>Spaghetti Tower. You could see it from your hotel room.
>It’s like the fluffy version of the Magic Kingdom Castle.
>”Waaaaaah, wook, Daddeh! Dat biggest sketti eva!”
>”I think you’re right, Marigold.”
>”No fink Mawigowd can eat aw dat sketti!”
>”Don’t worry, honey, I’m sure all the other fluffies here will help you.”
>Everywhere around you are fluffies and their owners.
>Some fluffies are being carried.
>Others are on leashes.
>Some are just roaming free. Not a good idea. Fluffies are slow and clumsy, but in this crowd, they’ll disappear if you so much as blink. If you’re lucky, you’ll be able to find them again at the lost and found.
>If you’re not lucky, well, they have a new fluffy shop right over there.
>Well, that’s their owner’s problem.
>On your left you can see a shop for fluffy paraphernalia.
>Perfect, you’re definitely going to want to put some ID on Marigold before she gets herself lost.
>You let Marigold pick out a very pretty white collar, and you get a tag with her name and your phone number attached to it.
>You also get a leash for her, one that can clip to your belt loop. That way, you’re both able to walk freely, and she can’t scamper off too far.
>Marigold is overjoyed with her new leash, even though she can’t see it when it’s on.
>The tag jingles softly as she waddles around.
>Leaving the shop, you see a place to get fluffies registered and tagged across the street.
>Maybe later. She’s not going to like getting chipped, so you’ll save it for after she’s enjoyed a few rides.
>Speaking of which…
>You see further down the street is a building labeled “GOOD FLUFFY RIDE”
>The line’s not too long, either.
>Well, hot diggidy, what are we waiting for?
>”Come on, Marigold! Want to go on the good fluffy ride?”
>Marigold trots alongside you, attached to her leash.
>”Mawigowd good fwuffy! Wan go on good fwuffy wide!”
>You wait in line for about ten minutes.
>Marigold spends that time gazing in awe at all the stuff the park has to offer.
>She’s probably making a mental list of all the stuff she wants to go see next.
>You’re guessing it’s everything.
>Well, you have the whole weekend and Monday, so no rush.
>You reach the front of the line, and an attendant instructs you.
>“Here are your 3D glasses. Put them on, then please step into the booth to manually evacuate your fluffy into the bin before entering into the Good Fluffy Lesson. Be sure to select your training intensity and say your fluffy’s name into the microphone for the ride,” says the human.
>Oh, it’s a training thing. Must be for all those spoiled brats who cry if they don’t get spaghetti.
>Your Marigold doesn’t really need this, but oh well, you’re already at the front, and she’s excited.
>You step into the building and you see a booth with a raised grate. Hanging on the booth wall is what looks like the top part of a stethoscope that attaches to the wall.
>A plaque underneath it explains.
>”For those owners who are unwilling or unable to apply enough pressure to forcibly empty their fluffy’s bowels, please use the sonic emitters provided.”
>What the?
>You put Marigold on the grate and tell her to make poopies.
>She shifts around uncomfortably. “Whewe wittabox?”
>”This is a litterbox, honey. It’s alright.”
>Marigold nods, reassured, and strains as hard as she can.
>Not much comes out.
>Time to try out the sonic emitters.
>Taking the emitter off of its wall hook, you put a bud in each ear.
>Marigold’s eyes go wide, and then suddenly she starts pooping. A lot.
>After a few seconds, nothing more comes out.
>Huh. That’s pretty effective. Must be emitting a fluffy brown note.
>You take the emitters off and put them back.
>”Make good poopies?”
>”Yes, very good poopies, now let’s go.”
>You and Marigold exit the booth and go further into the building to find a console with a few buttons and a microphone.
>The inscription says, “Please select your preferred level of fluffy training and clearly state their name.”
>The difficulties range from easy to extreme.
>No need to start a good fluffy like Marigold off with extreme training. You press easy and say her name into the microphone.
>Down a few steps is a cart with a seat for people and a grate with a glass cover that’s obviously meant for a fluffy.
>An attendant helps to sit Marigold properly on her seat, and puts on her 3D glasses.
>”Daddeh! Evwyfing wook funny!”
>You sit down in your own chair and put on your 3D glasses, and the cart starts moving through a dark hallway.
>You see lots of CG fluffies lighting up the darkness, singing.
>“Be gud fow you mummies an daddehs!”
>“Dey keep you saf an wam!”
>“Aways wisten to you mummies an daddehs!”
>“Ow you wish you nevah be bown!”
>Oh, so it’s kinda like the Muppets Show ride from Disney World.
>Bitchin’.
>The room goes dark again, then lights up as you see an owner and her fluffy in a house.
>That is a seriously cute looking fluffy.
>The owner ain’t half bad herself.
>“Now, now, fluffy, be sure not to break things!. Don’t make not pretties on the rug,” says the owner. “You make not pretties on the rug, you’ll get the sorry box!”
>Marigold is completely absorbed into the performance.
>You gotta admit, this is really good 3D.
>“Isn’t that right… MARIGOLD?”
>So that’s why they had you say her name earlier.
>Not a very good mix. They did some audio effect to make sound at least somewhat like the lady, but now she sounds kinda like Dr. Girlfriend from Venture Bros. whenever she says Marigold’s name.
>Marigold falls for it.
>”Waaaah, how know fwuffy name, nice wady?”
>The owner ignores her and looks at her fluffy.
>“I nawt bweak tings!” says pretty fluffy. “I nawt haf bad poopies!”
>“Now I’m going to go out, fluffy. You behave with your good friend… MARIGOLD… okay? Don’t go outside, or the monsters will get you.”
>The screen fluffy walks closer to the cart, where Marigold is watching with rapt attention.
>The fluffy smiles at Marigold. “Wan pway game?”
>Marigold laughs. “Wuv pway! Wan pway game!”
>She tries to reach out and hug the 3D fluffy, but her hooves just thump against the glass.
>The owner walks off screen, and you hear the sound of a door close.
>The fluffy runs over to a table and kicks it until a vase falls off the side and shatters to pieces on the ground.
>Marigold is horrified. “Why new fwend do dat? Nice wady say no bweak tings!”
>“Cause momeh nawt no noffin!” says pretty fluffy. “Watch dis!”
>Now the 3D fluffy is shitting on the carpet. It’s a pretty big deuce, too. She probably just lost a pound.
>“No wisten to mommies!” she says. “Why wisten to mommies? Wets go outside!”
>The fluffy runs towards the back door, and the ride follows her as she pushes the door open and runs outside.
>Marigold starts getting scared.
>”No, fwend! Nice wady say no go outside, no make bad poopies! No wan pway game no mo!”
>But she can’t stop the ride as it rolls her outside, where the 3D fluffy is now rolling around in the grass laughing.
>“Mummah say nawt go outside but mummeh dumb!” says pretty fluffy. “Why wisten to mummah?”
>Marigold turns to you.
>”Daddy, pwease make new fwend be good fwuffy!”
>You just shake your head. “She’s not my fluffy, I can’t tell her what to do.”
>Marigold turns back to her new virtual friend.
>Suddenly the sky starts turning dark. The 3D fluffy and Marigold share the same worried expression.
>”Wan go back in house.” The 3D fluffy decides.
>The ride follows as she tries to head for the house, but when she turns around, the house isn’t there.
>She’s alone on a wide hill, with no signs of life as far as the eye can see.
>The 3D fluffy starts panicking.
>”Whewe house? Whewe Momma? Fwuffy scawed, no wan pway outside!”
>She runs around, looking for anything that isn’t grass or blackened sky.
>Lightning flashes, and both Marigold and the 3D fluffy flinch in terror.
>”Fwuffy sowwy! Fwuffy shoudn’t bweak Momma tings! No make bad poopies! Fwuffy should haf wistened to Momma!”
>The 3D fluffy is crying her eyes out, running down the hill in search of shelter from the scary storm.
>Lightning flashes and thunder booms, and each time, Marigold lets out a squeak of fear.
>”Fwuffy should haf wistened to Momma! Fwuffy sowwy! Now fwuffy wost, neba fin’ home again!”
>The fluffy stops for a moment and turns to Marigold.
>”You good fwuffy?”
>Marigold nervously nods her head.
>”Wha’ good fwuffies do, MARIGOLD?”
>”Good f-f-fwuffies w-wisten to Mommas and D-Daddehs…”
>”Awways wisten to Mommas and Daddehs, good fwuffy!”
>The 3D fluffy turns around and starts running again, calling out for her owner. The ride doesn’t follow her, and the room slowly fades to black.
>The ride rolls through a curtain to the exiting area.
>The glass walls lift, and Marigold runs to your arms, hugging you as tight as her little body can.
>”Mawigowd wuv Daddeh! Do wa Daddeh say!”
>She’s crying a little. You cuddle her in your arms and assure you that you love her and that she’s safe.
>The attendant at the end takes the 3D glasses from the two of you.
>”Those are some impressive effects, especially the CG fluffy. So why do you guys have this ride right at the front of the park?”
>”It helps gets the fluffies in an obedient mood. It’s especially helpful for the bratty fluffies. Scares them straight so they’re not as much of a pain.”
>You nod. Makes sense.
>”So if that was the nice setting, what’s it like on extreme?”
>The attendant takes a good look at you gently holding your fluffy like a baby as Marigold sniffles and nuzzles your shoulder, mumbling “Wuv Daddeh…”
>”Man, you’re a good owner with a good fluffy. You really don’t want to know.”
>He’s probably right.
>You ask him for recommendations and he throws out a few rides that sound promising.
>You slip the guy five bucks for the info and walk through the exit.
>There’s a small sitting area that leads back out into the park. You sit down and let Marigold compose herself.
>”Honey, you okay?”
>Marigold looks up at you with sad eyes.
>Ah, more weaponized cuteness.
>She’s a war crime waiting to happen. An adorable little war crime.
>”Wha happen to nawty fwuffy?”
>You think up a lie.
>”She found her home, and her owner was very angry. The fluffy got the sorry stick and no dinner.”
>Marigold calms down a bit after hearing the fluffy was safe. “Daddeh, can we go back to Sketti Wand?”
>You smile. “Of course, sweety.”
>You reattach her leash and you both walk out.
>Her face lights up again when she realizes she’s back in the park.
>Time for another ride. Preferably one that makes her smile.
>That guy did recommend the Fluffy Theater of Tomorrow…