Yknow, sometimes you just gotta accept Life’s little gifts.
Like when HR offers you another micro but they warn you it’s not pillowed and also derped by abuse. You take the poor thing in and enjoy the blabbering fat mass as you go through your day, this might be the start of a beautiful Abuseship <3
sees: ~‘made in china’ ~
Dudes already dead even if that wasn’t glue they were eating…
Fat and retarded name him P tear griffin
I thought for a moment it was butane.
see how long the new toy lasts
Did anyone else immediately think of those water worm toys from elementary school? It’s a plastic or rubber tube full of water that slips forward and back and you play.
Also, I want to play Will He Eat It with more than just glue. I lowkey love this little dork.
White out.
The Wasabi from lunch sushi.
The mostly in tact fly you swatted.
Undiluted caffeinated fruit water flavoring.
A multivitamin/pain reducer tablet you spilt while taking some earlier.
An uncapped sharpie you put down after sniffing to answer a call.
Alright little buddy. Mr glue stick wants to be your “enfie fwen” so turn around
They close each eye separately processing what you are saying in an attempt at blinking. They pull the glue stick out of their mouth before turning the glue stick around, upside down and begin pushing it down into their nono stick while burbling as if confirming approval.
Wow, that took me a little too long to get, I’m also derped
Instant coffee in powder form.
Cat poop.
Eraser shreds.
The goulash someone left in the office fridge a month ago.
Microwave popcorn.
Staples.
Spilled toner.
Do you have an office cat?
Or do you keep it around for other work reasons?
Crazy Shirley in Accounting always has some on her.
One of them Company Issued Stress Fluffies.
