Chapter V: Rebirth
Previous Chapter: Chapter IV
Fenrir was startled, turning nervously to look up at his new daddy. He thought he was being good, why was daddy mad?
‘Daddy, am sowwie. Wat Fenwiwr du wong? Wiww make gud poopies, pwomise!’ Fenrir pleaded at Mark.
Mark didn’t know what to make of it. He decided to be blunt and level with Fenrir. ‘Fenrir, buddy, you don’t need to eat your poop. That’s really bad for you. Why did you think you needed to do that? You already went in the box, that was all I wanted from you.’
‘Mummah wud teww bestes’ sissy dat gud poopies am fow dummeh poopeh babbehs. Mummah wud be mad if poopeh babbehs nu cwean sissy ow sissy poopies.’ Fenrir responded, looking downcast.
‘Well she was an awful mother. She was a bad mummah, Fenrir’ Mark replied, getting slightly angry at hearing this.
Fenrir was shocked to hear someone say that she was a bad mummah. At first, he didn’t like the sound of fluffies being called bad, but then he realised that his new daddy was right! She was a bad mummah. She got all of her babies killed, except for him. She never raised her babies at all, except for the one she called ‘bestest’ and as soon as she was scared by the monster, she abandoned them all and forgot! He saw her wanting more babies as though she never had any babies at all. It made Fenrir angry too.
‘Daddy am wite!’ Fenrir suddenly shouted, coming to a satisfactory conclusion.
Mark was surprised, but he was glad Fenrir was getting into the spirit. ‘That’s right buddy! Come here and give me a hug, little guy.’ Fenrir practically jumped for joy out of the box and into Mark’s arms. ‘Daddeh! Wuv huggies!’ he exclaimed. Mark held him for a few moments and sniffed. ‘Buddy, I think you might need a bath.’
Fenrir was puzzled, ‘Wut am baff, daddeh?’ he asked.
‘Well, I’ll take you into the bathroom, and run some water and get some soap and we’ll get you cleaned up’ Mark replied. Fenrir became nervous.
‘Wawa?’ he asked, nervously. ‘Buh mummah say wawa am bad fow fwuffies.’
‘Don’t worry Fenrir, I’ll be with you. It’s just a little water. I’ll even show you, and after you try it, you’ll love it. I promise.’ Mark gave him a smile, carrying him into the bathroom. Fenrir remained nervous, but so far his daddy had always been nice, and right, so he gave in. Learning to trust in Mark was becoming easier. Despite Fenrir’s experiences on his own, Mark had shown him nothing but care. Not everything was happy, but everything was better, much, much better than it ever was.
Mark thought it might be better to go for a shower first. Placing Fenrir on the tile next to the tub, he turned on the shower head and waited for the water to be a nice warm temperature. Fenrir looked on, curious.
‘Here, see, I’ll show you.’ Mark placed his arm under the water and took it out, letting Fenrir observe and sniff. Fenrir was a bit nervous, but it seemed okay. Mark picked him up and placed him in the tub. Working the water from Fenrir’s tail towards his head, he gradually allowed him to acclimate to the water. Fenrir was surprised that the water felt warm and good!
‘Wawa feew pwetty Daddy, Fenwiwr wike nice wawas’ Fenrir said, flashing a beaming glance at Mark. Taking some soap from the bottle on the tub’s ledge, Mark rubbed it into Fenrir’s fur. The strong scent of citrus filled Fenrir’s nose.
‘Smeww pwetty daddeh, wut is dat?’ Fenrir asked, noticing the bubbles and the soothing scent. ‘It’s soap, citrus scent. Daddy uses it too, and it makes bubbles. Those are really fun.’ Mark blew some from his hands into the air. Fenrir laughed. ‘Hehe, bubbews aww fun!’
Rinsing Fenrir off, Mark grabbed a towel and picked him up, setting him on the tile again. He ruffled his fur with the towel, Fenrir giggling some more. He grabbed a hair dryer and a brush and brushed his fur out, leaving it dry and nicely groomed. Mark was surprised how his fur almost shimmered in the light. He’d seen his colours before, but now his slate black—near grey coat really shined under the light. The blue, iridescence of his mane and tail really were something. He’d never seen another fluffy with this kind of brilliance that danced depending on the angle of the light. Fenrir was also amazed, he felt so nice, and his fur looked so pretty!
‘Daddeh! Am feew su pwetty, wook su pwetty! Fenwiwr nu know cud wook an feew wike dis befow!’ Fenrir was feeling over the moon.
‘It’s amazing what a bit of self care can do’ Mark replied. ‘You were out on your own, it doesn’t quite match up to having a nice bath and grooming your hair, or your fur, in your case.’
Bath time over, Mark decided to get Fenrir along to watch him set up the safe room. He placed the litter box in the corner, and brought in a soft and fluffy pet bed for him to sleep in. Out of the FluffMart bag he set down a ball, blocks, and some fuzzy catlike toys on sticks for when he would play with Fenrir. He even got some sticks for good measure, in case Fenrir liked the idea of fetch. Honestly, he wasn’t sure what all he would like, but he tried to cover his bases. Fenrir, for his part was just ecstatic about everything. He’d never seen so many things before just for him!
'Wub woom and toysies… wub aww tings daddeh. Wub ‘ou daddeh!’ he exclaimed, latching onto Mark in a big hug, as much of one as a fluffy could mustre.
‘I’m glad buddy, I love you too.’ Mark continued arranging the room, trying to make sure he remembered everything. Then he knew he had to have a chat with Fenrir.
‘Fenrir, this is your safe room. You can play as much as you want, you can sleep, you’ve got your litter box. But when daddy isn’t home, you have to stay here. If you leave the room, there are things out in the house which aren’t safe. You might get hurt, and that would make me really sad.’
Fenrir listened to Mark, and knew there were a lot of dangerous things based on his own experience in the wild. ‘Otay daddeh, Fenwiwr unn’stan. Can Fenwiwr wewn housie wid daddeh, su Fenwiwr know wat am bad tings?’
He looked up at Mark, wondering if there was a way he could be outside more. Mostly he just wanted to be near Mark, the toys, the bed, everything was so nice, so much fun. But still, more than anything, he wanted to be near someone. He didn’t want to be alone again.
‘Of course. I’m here right now, so we can be anywhere in the house you want to be. Would you like to watch TV and eat some dinner? Are you hungry?’ Mark thought maybe some food and bonding time would be a good start.
‘Yus daddeh! Wan du wat daddeh wan. An nummies awways gud.’
‘Well that’s good, but remember, you can tell me what you like and don’t like, okay?’ Mark wanted to reassure Fenrir that he wasn’t there to do Mark’s bidding. He was family, and families support each other.
‘Otay daddeh!’ Fenrir walked up to Mark, and began to sit on only his hind legs. Mark learned this meant fluffies were expecting you to lift them up, probably part of their intended design to be cuddly, lap friendly pets. It’s a shame so many of them had incontinence issues. Picking Fenrir up, he carried him to the sofa and turned on the TV. He wasn’t really sure what Fenrir would like, so he cued up some cartoons. Adventure Time seemed like a good fit, something they could both enjoy, with good lessons and engaging humour.
‘Here buddy, watch this and I’ll make some food. Actually, what do you want to eat? I didn’t really think about what you might want.’
Fenrir hadn’t been asked that before, and he really didn’t even know what different kinds of food were. So the best he could manage to think of was ‘Gud nummies? If daddeh hab gud nummies, Fenwiwr wiww eat dose too.’
Mark was incredulous, but, he had set aside ingredients for tonight to make udon. Unsure whether Fenrir would enjoy the soup as much, he’d split it into two dishes and let Fenrir have yakiudon instead. Once he’d completed cooking, he sat down next to Fenrir, placing his own bowl of kitsune udon, made with his preferred set of ingredients on the table in front of the sofa. Next to it, he placed Fenrir’s dish of yakiudon. It had the same ingredients, minus the dashi stock soup, which he carefully broke up into smaller pieces for easier bites.
Fenrir gradually walked towards the bowl, sniffing the air. He hopped onto the table and sniffed really closely, checking to see if it smelled okay. Looking at Mark, he asked ‘Am dis daddeh’s nummies?’
‘That’s right.’
‘Wat am dese nummies?’ Fenrir asked as he looked at the plate before him and wondered.
‘It’s called udon.’
‘Udon?’
Huh, he can actually say udon. That’s cool. ‘Yeah, it’s got potatoes, radish, onions, seaweed, egg, fried tofu, and noodles’ Mark listed the things in it out for Fenrir to know exactly what was there, not that he expected Fenrir to know all the ingredients but maybe he’d be able to teach him. And he’d probably let Mark know what he did and didn’t like.
Fenrir gazed at the noodles on the plate before him, and recalled something he almost forgot. His mother had cooed to his bestest sissy a lot, and told her about a really, really tasty dish called ‘sketti’. He didn’t know exactly what it looked like, or how it tasted, but he knew that it was long like the tall grass, and round like the pine needles. At least, according to his mother, it was.
‘Nooduws? Nooduws wook wike sketties! Am wike sketties?’ Fenrir became very excited.
‘Uh, yeah I guess you could think of it kind of like spaghetti. They’re whole wheat, high in fibre, and they don’t really taste like Italian spaghetti but…’ Mark looked over and noticed Fenrir was tearing into it. He took a second to look up at Mark, food still in his mouth. ‘Am ymm dddh…’ he tried to mouth out, a bit unable to make the words with so much food blocking his speech. Mark got the idea, though. He seemed to like it.
After they finished eating, they cuddled up on the sofa, Fenrir on Mark’s chest watching a few episodes of Adventure Time. Fenrir really liked Jake, maybe he got the vibe of Jake reminding him somewhat of himself. Mark was just glad they could have an interest in the same media. He’d also look into FluffTV for him, especially when he had to go in to work. Recently he’d been able to do a lot of it from home, but there were still days when major problems erupted, and his boss would call him in. He hoped Fenrir would be able to handle the separation, but so far, everything was going surprisingly smoothly.
Fenrir and Mark both beginning to get tired, Mark sat up and shut off the TV. ‘Alright buddy, I think we should go to sleep now.’
‘Fenwiwr am sweepies…’ he yawned. ‘Buh, daddeh, can Fenwiwr sweep wid daddeh dis dawk time? Wub woom, buh dun wan weave daddeh yet.’
‘I don’t know Fenrir, you can’t make bad poopies in daddy’s bed. Otherwise daddy won’t let you.’ Mark was unsure. Maybe he could bring the box in his room, and place something for Fenrir to step down to the floor.
‘Fenwiwr pwomise! Nu make bad poopies, wiww gu to bawks!’ Fenrir gazed at Mark with puppy eyes, and Mark gave in.
‘Alright, you can. But you can’t always sleep with daddy. You have your own bed too.’
‘Yay! Otay daddeh!’ Fenrir wagged his tail. Mark set him on his bed, went back to Fenrir’s room to get the litter box just to be sure, and placed a small footstool on one side of the bed so that Fenrir could get down if he had to go. Hopping into bed and under the duvet, Mark curled to one side, inviting Fenrir to sleep under his arm. The two nestled in, Fenrir cooed and he and Mark fell soundly to sleep.
Just over a month had gone by. Mark had barely had to go into the office, and the few times he had, Fenrir was for the most part, okay. The child barrier made sure he didn’t leave the safe room, but Fenrir seemed very good at following instructions, sometimes with suboptimal results. Mark had once told him to play with his toys while he was at work, and he found Fenrir whimpering by the gate when he got home. He told Mark he was playing with his ball, and he managed to bounce it past the gate and he couldn’t leap over to retrieve it. Apparently he sat there for hours trying to figure out how to get the ball back because Mark told him to play with his toys. Mark felt a bit of a facepalm moment, but he cuddled Fenrir and told him he was sorry. Perhaps Fenrir needed to learn a bit more about not taking everything ‘to the letter’.
The FluffCare centre did get back to Mark about a week after Fenrir was brought home. It turned out Eurydice had a blood clot which went undetected. Unfortunately, that was what stopped her heart. Once he brought her home in an urn, Fenrir hugged it. He’d told Fenrir that his sister was in the urn, but he didn’t really get that she was decomposed and no longer whole. Fenrir asked what happened to his sister, remembering that he told him he’d find out. He tried to explain, but the best way he found that Fenrir could grasp the concept was that ‘she had a bad thing that no one saw which made her heart hurt too much, and that made her so tired she went to sleep forever.’
The sweetest part about Fenrir, Mark noticed, was that he always wanted to make someone feel better. Even if it wasn’t possible, he would try. He asked Mark to let Eurydice sleep in his room, because he knew she didn’t like sleeping alone. No fluffy really wanted to be alone. Mark obliged, but made sure she was in a safe spot. He placed her on a shelf out of reach. ‘That way’ Mark said, ‘she could look at all the toys and see the pretty things through the window.’ Fenrir was pleased, ecstatic that she was there at all.
It’d been another long day of work, so many issues always happening, customers never happy, colleagues not getting their act together. Mark sighed. He thought perhaps it’d be good to relax and watch some TV.
‘Hey Fenrir, wanna watch TV with daddy?’ he called out, stretching, and making his way from his desk towards the hallway.
‘TV wid daddeh? Otay!’ Fenrir replied, dropping his crayons he’d previously been doodling with on scrap paper in his safe room. Mark lifted him up and both plopped on the sofa, ready to watch something, whatever good was on, Mark thought.
But Fenrir asked ‘Daddeh, can wook at Fwuff Teebee? Am nyu epi…epi…episode (he struggled to say the word) ob Mystic!’ Mark noticed he’d gotten into some of the fluffy shows, of course it made sense. They were practically moulded to be as addicting as catnip to fluffies. But, since Fenrir didn’t ask for much TV specifically for himself, Mark thought it wouldn’t hurt. The fluffies on there would sometimes be hilarious in their stupidity. He definitely tried to not let Fenrir know that’s what he found amusing, however.
‘Sure buddy.’ He scrolled to the channel. ‘…make ebwyting bettew! Wub babbehs!’ Mark heard as the channel came in. Oh god, not Babies! It looked like it was ending momentarily. He’d heard horror stories on the FluffyOwners forum about how that show can easily brainwash fluffies into demanding to be allowed foals. He glanced over at Fenrir to see what his reaction was. ‘Dis am nu Mystic. Wen am Mystic?’ Fenrir was muttering to himself. Whew. Mark was relieved.
Fenrir was pretty much adult age at this point. At his follow up, the doctor said he was developing really well and asked Mark if he wanted him fixed, but Mark didn’t really know at the time. So far though, it seemed like Fenrir wasn’t jumping to have babies. He didn’t even seem interested in the show. That gave Mark a thought to ask him personally. After all, he was curious.
‘Fenrir?’
‘Yus daddeh?’
‘What do you think of that show, Babies!?’
Fenrir was quiet for a moment. ‘Babbehs am gud babbehs, buh, babbehs nu awways hab wub and huggies, ow gud mummah ow daddeh. Fenwiwr see babbehs at stowsies wid daddeh, an nu hab mummah, nu hab hoomin daddeh eaduh.’
Mark was taken aback by Fenrir saying this. He thought it’d be something simple, but it seemed Fenrir was wrestling with something a lot of humans even do.
‘Do you want babies, Fenrir?’
Again he didn’t respond right away. ‘Wen Fenwiwr was babbeh, was su saddies, nu had wuv buh fow bwudda an sissies. Mummah nu wuv babbehs. Fenwiwr nu wan huwt babbehs, am onwy babbehs.’
‘I’m sorry Fenrir, I didn’t know you thought like that. I didn’t mean to make you sad.’ Mark felt bad for even bringing it up, but Fenrir’s face returned to a smile, noticing Mark’s now glum expression.
‘Nu wowwy daddeh! Fenwiwr nu saddies, hav daddeh! Wuv daddeh!’ he giggled. Mark smiled back. Perhaps fluffies could easily move past topics. At any rate, Fenrir could be content in the present. Within moments, the Babies! show had ended and the theme music to Mystic the Alicorn crescendoed from the TV.
‘Yay! Mystic! Hab pointies an wingies! Su coow!’ Fenrir exclaimed. He was learning more vocabulary bit by bit, it seemed.
‘Hey Fenrir, after your show, would you like to go for a walk?’ It was getting later, the sun would probably be down soon. The air turning chilly, Mark figured it’d be good to get more exercise in for the both of them before the snow began to fall, making it harder to get outdoors.
‘Wawkies? Otay daddeh!’ Fenrir offhandedly replied, still engrossed in his Mystic show.
As the credits rolled, and the ads for Hasbio branded FluffySkettis started, Mark turned to Fenrir, stretching. ‘Ready to walk with daddy?’ Good thing these fluffy shows are only 15 minutes each, he thought.
‘Am time fow wawkies wid daddeh? Otay!’ Fenrir replied, hopping down, trotting to the door. Mark grabbed his jacket and placed Fenrir in his harness, attaching the leash. He opened the door, the autumn air crisp, but not too cold.
‘Oh! Cowdies daddeh!’ Fenrir exclaimed.
‘Don’t worry bud, it’s not that cold. And we won’t be gone too long, let’s just walk to the end of the street and back. We’ll make it a quick one, then we can have dinner.’
‘Yay, nummies!’ Fenrir cooed as he trotted along.
They’d walked nearly to the end of the street, when Mark heard a rustling in the direction of a hedge of a nearby house, adjoining an alley. Fenrir, too, began to sniff. ‘Daddeh’ Fenrir started as he stopped trotting along, ‘Fenwiwr smeww fwuffy’.
‘Is it coming from over there, Fenrir?’ Mark pointed. Fenrir took a moment to think, and sniffed again. ‘Am tink su’ he replied.
Carefully, Mark walked towards the rustling, Fenrir right beside. He began to hear something, talking? He couldn’t quite make it out yet. Finally he was close enough to make out the words. ‘Nu wan.’
No want? This sounded kind of bad, Mark thought. It reminded him of his first encounter with Fenrir, so worry began to rise in him. Still, he turned the corner into the alley and saw a reddish orange pegasus balled up, shaking. Continually the pegasus was repeating ‘Nu wan, nu wan, nu wan’. Mark tried to talk to the fluffy.
‘Hey, are you okay?’ he plied. Still, the fluffy just kept repeating the same words over and over, with no reaction. He turned to Fenrir. ‘Can you tell anything about it?’
Fenrir was puzzled too. ‘Nu know daddeh, buh wingie fwuffy am stallion. Wook weewy saddies.’
‘A stallion? Okay.’ ‘Hey, buddy, do you need some help? I’m not going to hurt you.’ Mark called out to the fluffy, but still got no response. Finally, the stallion said one more word along with his repeting phrase. ‘Awex nu wan, nu wan, Awex nu wan…’
‘Did he say Alex, Fenrir?’
‘Fenwiwr tink su daddeh. Mabbeh am namesies?’
‘Maybe…’
‘Alex, do you want to come home with us? We can get you out of the cold.’ Mark tried again. Alex’s eyes glanced in his direction but he continued his repetition, shaking incessantly.
‘Fenrir, can you see if he’ll respond to you?’ Mark was worried about trying to move him too quickly. He thought he’d try to coax him before he acted, seeing his clear distress.
‘Awex, am Fenwiwr, wan be nyu fwen?’ Fenrir asked, slowly walking towards him. Alex still didn’t respond. He placed a hoof on his shoulder, but though Alex jolted slightly, he still seemed unresponsive.
He’s in shock. Mark thought for a moment, was he getting himself into something again? But how could he just leave him? He seems harmless, and he’s just shivering there. There are even some nicks on him like scars. Could he have been abused?
Mark wasn’t sure, but he made up his mind. ‘Fenrir, let’s take him home. We can at least get him inside and out of the cold. Can you walk with daddy? I can’t hold your lead if I’m carrying him.’
‘Yus daddeh!’ Fenrir responded.
Mark disconnected Fenrir’s lead and placed it in his pocket, then carefully walked to Alex, and gently scooped him up into both arms. Alex turned his head and glanced at Mark for a moment, but then returned to his muttering. ‘Nu wan.’
The three of them walked quietly home, the only sound Alex’s repetition, like a clock ticking, or a step to the beat of music. Mark opened the door, placed Alex on the sofa, gathering some spare blankets. He spread them out into a sort of bed on the floor and placed Alex there.
‘Fenrir, keep an eye on him. I’m going to make us all some dinner.’
Fenrir sat in the archway to the kitchen, eyeing Alex. It made his heart hurt to see him so sad, he wanted to hug him. But daddy wanted him to just watch. Daddy was right, he didn’t want to scare Alex.
After Mark had finished making dinner, this time fried rice and steamed broccoli, he placed a bowl for Alex to eat, and sat down to eat with Fenrir.
Fenrir thought to himself, occasionally glancing at Alex, still catatonic. Mebbeh nummies wiww wowk. Nummies am gud. Mebbeh nummies?
Maybe.
Next Chapter: Chapter VI