“And now on Fluff TV, part of your everyday mandatory Fluffy needs, it’s Fluffy Ponies and You!”
A jingle starts playing, a saturday morning cartoon jingle over footage of fluffy ponies awkwardly waving to the camera and waddling into view, smash cut to the title.
“Fluffy ponies, oooh fluffy po-oh-nies, always stayin’ in styyyle!”
A shot of a corporately chosen mix of child actors crowding around a store window, looking at a bunch of fluffies playing with a ball, one of them is about to poop on a brown fluffy as the camera switches angles to avoid showing this behaviour.
“Fluffy ponies, ooooh Fluffy Ponayyysss, trademarked in the heart of a chiiiild!”
Several shots of fluffies doing activities that they obviously weren’t made for, reading books, riding in a bicycle basket while looking terrified in the close up, jumping over a skipping rope right before falling on its face and catching a baseball with the cutaway happening right as the force of the ball blasts the little fluffy off its feet.
“Many designs, shapes and size,from tiny little babies to fullgrown and wise!”
Cut to a fluffpile of babies wiggling around trying to hug each other, and then a mare and stallion but due to budget issues the best take they had was right before the stallion was eenfing the mare.
The new verse comes in with a call and response from a chorus of fluffies edited to try and sound like they’re in time.
“So what do fluffy ponies do?”
“GIB’ HUGGIES!”
“What do fluffy ponies do?”
PWAY WIF’ TOYSIES!
“I said what do fluffy ponies do?”
“EAT DA’ SKETTIES!”
All to a montage of of hugs, building blocks falling over and landing on a fluffy behind the tower and a fluffy too busy trying look at the camera while eating spaghetti it didn’t notice one of the foals falling in the bowl as it was about to take its next bite over the peeping foal.
“All this and more on Fluffies and You!”
“FWUFFY PONY!”
A final shot of fluffies being thrown into the air for a freeze frame, far too many for the underpaid staff members to try and catch on the way down, and it seems a few of the non pegasus fluffies in the back of the shot realized it from the looks on their falling faces.
