Welcome to “From the Desk” once again, my friends. As per usual, I’m Butch, your friendly neighborhood veterinarian with a certification in “biotoy maintenance” provided by the fine folks at Hasbio, and in today’s entry, we’ll be discussing…well, you can read the title.
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What is a Pillowfluff?
Short answer: some smartass breeder’s idea of saving space at shipping centers. Longer answer: a fluffy pony that, for one reason or another, has no legs, typically due to quadruple amputation. And before you ask, no, I don’t perform the procedure unless it’s absolutely medically necessary (we’re talking a “we need to cut off the legs now so that the fluffy doesn’t die” scenario here, FYI. Yes, believe it or not, some of us do have a basic understanding of medical ethics.)
Also, no, I have no idea where the name comes from.
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What is a Milkbag?
One of the more egregiously inhumane developments of the early days of the fluffy breeding industry, a “milkbag” is a pillowed, often blinded (and if they’re lucky, lobotomized) mare that’s pumped full of hormones to keep it lactating in order to feed foals. Now that fluffy formula is more easily available, the practice has largely been phased out (thank God), though apparently some smaller fly-by-night operations still use them.
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How do I care for a pillowfluff?
Assuming you actually have the fluffy’s best interests in mind, you’re going to need to keep it mentally stimulated in order to stave off that infamous terminal depression disorder we know as the “wan die loop”. That all being said, I recommend getting it prosthetic limbs, if for no other reason than you won’t have to carry it to the litterbox.
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How do I care for a milkbag?
Sadly, your best bet if you’ve got a milkbag on your hands is to have them euthanized because they’re usually too mentally broken to be of any use as pets. On the other hand, if you’re planning on having one for use in your amateur-hour breeding operation, then stop reading and start reconsidering your priorities.
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I love the exhausted rage in these.
I strongly disagree that the use of milk bags should be reduced because in the past there have already been discussions about this, that it is cheaper to take a milk bag than to buy milk with protein, because in terms of taste you can even use a milk bag feed with your own shit, and above all that you can throw it away and another one would immediately take its place, on the other hand, milk with protein its cost increases according to the market, which is why I very much doubt that the practice of milkbag is less practical than buying milk from protein
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Silly Doctor, Pillowfluffs are to abuse like Sensitive Babies. Here are some good uses for a Pillow Fluff! I am typing all this while sick, so…
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To keep your actually loved Fluffy happy with companionship
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Fixed, Pillowed Fluffies can be given enfies to stop the wan babies cycle.
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To abuse for fun!
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To teach your fluffy to be a good fluffy with a miserable litterpal in sight!
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To accessorize your house! Cork them and make them mute and you have some cheap, warm pillows to use for a few days to a week.
Now there are more reasons, but I’d say its more ethical to use a milk bag over fake foal milkies with additives, and much cheaper.
Protein powder, goes for like $6-7 a lb. More if its the pricy stuff. A single foal, lets say needs half a pound worth in a day. If a mare has four foals, this is $12 a day. They may need more as they get older…
But, one fluffy foal set would be close to $360 a month in formula costs (Assuming the future does not have any price hikes). Now a Fluffy Mill… where dozens of Fluffs are bred, with hundreds of babies, this more humane solution, would be easily $3,600 a month assuming there are 100 foals to care for.
Its cheaper to just get some Milkbag mares, and simply drug the fuck out of them and make them eat a slurry of nutrients, dead foals and fluffies grinded up, and other bleak things 
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Just a note on decorative pillows, if buying them for specific holiday decor, avoid the rush rather than risk getting poopies with bright manes. Buy your bright fluffies ahead of time in the correct colours (Halloween, Mardi Gras, Purim, etc), treat them like your beloved pets, spoil them, cuddle them, maybe let them sleep in your bed. Tell them all about the holiday in question and get them all ramped up and excited.
A few hours before guests are due, pillow them. Empty and plug them (don’t forget the urethra!). Cut out their tongue and alter the larynx with online instructions. Not only will your pillows look amazing, the pain and betrayal in their eyes will really drive home the holiday spirit.
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