“Buh mummah , am gud fwuffy !”
(THWACK!)
“You ate an entire watermelon! I didn’t get any of it!”
You are Eustace a Fluffhemoth .
Mummah is very very upset with you.
“Eustace am sowwy mummah!
am su hungwy!Pwease nu huwt Eustace nu mowe!”
Mummah smacks you over the head with a metal baseball bat over and over again .
“Why! Won’t! You! DIE!?”
You look up at mummah and begin to sob.
“Why mummah du dis tu Eustace!!!?
Eustace awways be gud fwuffy!!!
Eustace use wittah bocks! Eustace Nu ask fow sketties! Eustace gib mummah Huggies! “
Mummah stops hitting you for a moment.
“Why? Because you’re no longer the cute foal papa bought me!”
“Whu…? (Sniffle)”
Mummah groans in frustration.
“You’re not cute anymore and papa says I can’t get another fluffy until you Die!”
Your heart shatters into a million pieces upon hearing those words.
“Eustace nu wan’ foweva sweepies!!! Eustace wan’ mummah!!!”
“Shut Up!!!”
Mummah starts hitting you again.
After what felt like an eternity of pain
Mummah gets tired.
She looks at the metal bat now bent , dented and stained with your boo-boo juice .
“Look what you did, another perfectly good piece of sporting equipment ruined!!!”
“……”
“Say something you stupid-“
“HATCHU!!!”
You bellow out.
The sheer vibrations of your voice nock Mummah to the ground.
She looks up at you in terror.
You raise your hoof .
“No. Eustace! Eustace!! EUSTACE!!!”
)