“Hello again you beautiful fluffy infomercial addicts. It’s me again, Dan Rather-Knott back again with more accessories for you to spend your ever inflating fiat currency on.” Dan paused to wave to the cheering audience as they walked up to the X on the stage and a counter rose up from the floor.
“If you’re like me, you’ve had at least a few incidents of the classic ‘poopy baby’ neglect from your mares. Well im here to fix that with the humanity engine.” As they say this a circle in the table disappears and a VR headset rotates up and begins spinning slowly. “With the humanity engine almost any redeemable mare can be set on the right path by forcing them to walk a mile in their foals hooves. And can I say, that’s quite a feat for a fluffy foal.” The studio audience laughs slightly as the assistant brings out a sleeping mare in a jumper.
“Thanks Pauline. This suit provides tactile interface for the fluffy with a rinseable interior and exterior lining.” As he says this the assistant gestures at a disassembled set that rises from the counter showing what the individual components look like.
“Whewe am Wosey?” The red fluffy adds groggily starting to stand.
“And it comes in an array of colors Dan.” The assistant adds gesturing to those that can be ordered standard and that custom colors can be ordered for an extra fee. As she’s saying this dan approaches from behind Rosey to grab a hold of her.
“Depending on your mares disposition the suit can remain standard, or can be used to restrain any number of limbs to help simulate everything from huggie friends.” As he says this he pulls a strap from the stomache up and slides the mares lower legs into position before releasing the strap.
“Wosey no wike~” she struggles. “Why back weggies go way?” As she continues to burble dan continues his display.
“All the way to Pillow fluffies.” He adds strapping in front in a similar fashion. “You can even adjust the positioning according to your setup.” He adds unstrapping her back legs and undoing some Velcro tabs from the legs and securing them to the carpeted counter before looping the back to a wall hook. “With the mare restrained you can conduct feedings as needed while training the mare.”
“Wosey nu undewstan wha going on. No wike dis game. Wan go back to gud babbehs, babbehs nee’ dewe mummah.”
“We even have the facial hood for general voice muffling and feeding.” He adds strapping on the equivalent of a horse feeder to her face.
“Mrrph burf furble….Mmmumies.” the complaining soon turned to chewing of the contents inside the mask.
“But it looks like we’re putting the cart before the horse, or in this case fluffy. You’re here to hear about the humanity engine.” As he says that he proceeds to secure the headset designed for fluffies onto their head and powers It on.
“While inside the engine the mare will experience an array of preprogramed scenarios that can be selected by you the owner depending on how bad you think your mare is. Everything from simple neglect,” as he says this he pushes a button on a remote and the mare stops eating and looks started having experienced the shock of being born all over again. A monitor comes down from the ceiling for the audience to watch. The colors are dull like watching the world through unopened eyes. “The engine works with an array of sight~ more prevalent for older memories. Sound, smell and touch. Taste can be added with the specialty feeder hardware and patch.” As he says this the sounds of a fluffy mother sounding disappointed in having a poopy baby can be heard followed by the abrupt sound of discarding.
“mmmrphaa moa~” Wosey barely manages to muffle her objections.
“The fluffy being unable to clearly hear their own words will start to think of it as their inner monologue and they usually stop trying to talk once they revert to simply thinking in their own head.” As he says this the screen shifts to darkness. Rosey begins chirping from the hood.
“Changes in color and light aid in fast pacing the fluffies own innate poor understanding of time passage. Allowing your to cram days of perceived neglect into an hour. Combine that with the tactile suit,” As he says this he lowers a microphone down so a slight buzzing can be heard. “We can simulate changes in temperature and even perceived ‘tummie hurties’ from not being fed. Rosey will be subject to an array of abusive language even mild physical discomfort” they say as if not to say ‘beatings’. “to simulate poopy baby monster baby or even dummy baby neglect depending on the options selected in the menu.”
“Since we don’t want to waste the rest of our program slot watching Rosey, we’ve prepared a second fluffy that has now entered the stage in its neglect where it has opened its eyes.” As they say this a second fluffy is lifted from another portion of the counter and locked in place. The monitor shifts over to the new feed.
Various moments played out. An apathetic parent noticing the poopie opening its eyes first only for them to praise their bestest a minute later for being first. Being forced to sit in a poop pile. Being shit on by siblings. Humans complaining about having to clean you only for your siblings to then exclude you from activities. “Scenarios like this and others will continue to play out and give the mare a first hand perspective they might have been lacking. We find that in over sixty percent of cases this is enough to change the fluffies attitude in how they deal with poor colors, alicorns and special needs fluffies. Meanwhile an additional thirty percent are now far more receptive to attempts at training and rules established to these regards.”
“Eight of the remaining ten percent can usually be reached by putting them through on ‘turbo’ mode. Turbo mode is only suggested in cases where the owner does not mind the fluffy suffering the equivalent of a reset. Turbo mode requires a week to safely but intensity reformat and train your fluffy back from a perspective of your choice, implanting false memories and ideals in their head by making them believe they performed these action in their past. Please read your warranty and terms of use regarding the remaining two percent.” Dan adds as he hears the wrap up music.
“That’s all the time we have today for the Humanity Engine, im Dan rather Knott so buy things associated with my credibility!” They add with a smile as the second fluffy slumps over in place brain dead from turbo mode.