A British citizen is awakened by knocking at the bottom of his front door.
He opens the door to find a blue unicorn with puffed cheeks looking up at him.
“Am bestest Smawty Napowean! Dis am Smawty’s wand nao, cwaim fow hewd!”
The homeowner responds.
“Not if Wellington has anything to say about it, you French pile of shit!”
The homeowner lashes out with his Wellington boots and sends the Smarty flying.
The Smarty doesn’t give up and makes another attempt at breaching the house.
Only to be snatched up.
“Face it Napoleon: This is your Waterloo!”
The Smarty is then flushed down the toilet with water, which British people call “loos.”
Napoleon went down the toilet like the pile of shit he was.
And that’s why the British chase French tourists through the streets with bars of soap.