I Dream A Fluffy: Oscar Redcoat Hemmingway (By YangXuan

I Dream A Fluffy

Oscar Redcoat Hemmingway

“Huuu huuu miss owd daddeh.” A baby like voice cood as their owner with big brown eyes stared at a strange sparkling bottle. The voice in question belonged to a fluffy, an earthie fluffy to be exact with burgundy red fluff, light grey mane, tail and brown eyes. The earthie stallion looked at the sparkling bottle in the light of the sky ball.

“Oscaw nu wike nu homesies. Wan toysies, skettis un wub. Huuu huuu wy owd daddeh hab tu go fowebah sweepies.”

The fluffy’s name was Oscar Redcoat Hemmingway and he was a stray who had been wandering the streets of the hoomin city for many bright times. He had been searching for taste nummies in the no smell pretty places. He had long since gotten used to eating no taste petty nummies to fill his tummeh and stop the hurties. He had long since learned not to trust the hoomins they gave worstest hurties and forever sleepies to good fluffies.

Oscar had a daddeh once a very old daddeh who went forever sleepies. His daddehs babbehs had chased Oscar away. Oscar had been very sad no longer having his old daddeh and old homesies. But Oscar worked hard at being a wild fluffy! Though he still missed his old life.

It was while searching for nummies that he came across a shiny bottle. “Huu wah am dis?” The inqusitive fluffy saw sticking out of a pile of garbage a shiny golden bottle.

“Fwuffy fwine shiny. Oscaw Wedcwoat Hemmennwah am bwess fwinnew.” With excitement he ran over and grabbed the top of the bottle with his nummy place and pulled it from the no smell pretty place. Hugging the bottle he giggled.

“Oscaw hab pwetti toysies su happi. Biggest heawt happies!” Oscar hugged the shiny bottle it was covered with strange rocks that were just as pretty. Oscar held the bottle close before dragging it back to his nestie having forgotten all about finding nummies, to distracted by the pretty toy. He huffed and puffed dragging the bottle to his little nestie.

The nest was a simple worn and torn cardboard box in a damp alleyway. The box was filled with rags and was damp around the edges. Fluffy shit was piled up close by. A drain pipe dripped as a puddle of water formed at the bottom. Oscar dragged the bottle into the pile with a happy smile.

“Biggest heawt happies!” Oscar wrapped his arms around the glistening bottle and cuddled with it. The bottle felt warm to Oscar and he rubbed his fluff against it. As he did, a strange cloud began to rise up from the top. The lid popped off with a loud pop.

“Eeeee! Scawie!” Oscar pushed the bottle away as he squirted small amounts of scaredy pee pee. The glistening bottle rolled as grey smoke wafted out from the top and began to rise into the air. The smoke changed shape as the temperature spiked.

“Oscaw nu wike.” The fluffy complained as burnies erupted from the bottle and began to take the shape of a hoomin. “Huuuu munstah hoomin nu huwt fwuffy huuu huu!”

Oscar laid in his nestie covering his eyes with his hoofs sobbing as flames poured out into the alleyway.

“I Am Wardah Dima Sa’ida 'Abbas Kamal who summons me!” A flaming apparition of a human appeared; his upper half was large and bulky adorned in a glistening deep orange vest. His upper half was made of pure fire mixes of deep reds, bright yellows and oranges. A pair of dark horns grew upon his head. His lower half however was nothing more than shrouded waving flames.

“Huuu huuu fwuffy nu wike huuuu.” Oscar cried again as he tried to shuffle into his nestie to hide from the munstah hoomin. The flaming being frowned as he looked down towards the tiny little horse pig-like creature.

Wardah floated down and peaked into the box as the fluffy cowered. “Fwuffy nu cwan see munstah, den munstah nu see fwuffy.”

“I can see you! Are you the one who summoned me! Are you my master!” Wardah spoke in a commanding and powerful tone, his voice booming loudly making the fluffy leap.

“SCREEEEE!” A loud fart erupted from the fluffies back end as he released a stream of scaredy poopies into the back of his home. “Nuuuu nuuu bad poopies. Huuu huuu nestie nu smeww pwetti.”

Oscar covered his face crying as the horrid smell filled his once warm clean nestie. The flaming human looked with disgust at the strange creature that spoke in the form of a broken common tongue.

“Enough! Are you the one who found my prison!” Wardah barked as he pointed to the bottle, scaring the fluffy again.

“Huuu pwease nu huwt fwuffy. Am gud fwuffy. Pwease nu huwties huuu. Fwuffy nu mwean tu fwine pwetti boddwe. Huuuu huuu.” Oscar continued crying as he pleaded for the munstah not to hurt him.

“Then since you rubbed the bottle that was my prison, you are now my master. I will grant you three wishes that are within my power! So says the Efreeti Wardah Dima Sa’ida 'Abbas Kamal of the City of Brass from the Planes of Elemental Fire! Tell me thy name!” Wardah spoke his words filled with magic as an aura surrounded him and the fluffy.

“Huu huu nu wike. Buwnies am bad for fluffies. Gu way munstah!” Oscar continues hiding in his box nestie, his fluffy becoming stained by his scaredy poopies. “Huuu Oscar nu smeww pwetti.”

The Efreeti raised a hand to his face and rubbed the bridge of his nose in frustration at the pathetic little creature that was now his master. “This…this is going to be a long day.”

Wardah began to shrink his form in order to match that of the fluffy’s. The flames compressed as he grew smaller and smaller until he was eye level with the horse-like creature. “Listen to my words little master, I am not going to hurt you. I am a friend.”

The Efreeti’s voice was powerful but soothing as he spoke to the tiny little creature attempting to draw it from its crying. If he wanted to leave this place and be free of his current master he must get the creature to make three wishes.

“Huuu huuu…nu huwt fwuffy?” Oscar asked between sobs as he slowly looked up at the so-called munstah. His big brown eyes blinked the munstah was smaller. “Am fwen huuu?”

“For now. You are my master. I will grant thee three wishes.” The Efreeti began to explain once more as he folded his arms across his muscular chest.

“Masda? Wha am dat? Wha am whidshes? Huuuu.” The little fluffy looked up curiously his tears slowly stobbing. He choked back a sob as he tried to wipe the tears.

“Haaaaa. Master means I do what you say. And wishes are a magic I use to give you something you want.” The Genie tried to explain as he felt a headache slowly coming on.

“Gib fwuffy wah fwuffy wahns?” Oscar blinked his big round eyes somewhat confused. “Den…den Oscaw teww meanie munstah?”

“Yes you tell me what you want and I will make it happen. But before I can even grant you your wishes, what is your name.” Wardah gave a sigh of relief as they were finally getting somewhere.

“Am Oscaw Wedcwoat Hemmennwah mistah munstah! Ba ebwyone caww fwuffy Oscaw.” The little fluffy perked up as he stood on his hoofs and waved happily. The heavy stench of his own shit hanging in the air making the geniee wrinkle his nose in disgust.

"Very well…Oscar. Tell me what it is you wish for!" The Genie asked as he slowly floated back and hovered around the box that was Oscar’s home.

“Oscaw nestie nu smeww pwetti, mwake nu smeww pwetti smeww gu way!” The little fluffy demanded with a huff as he puffed out his cheeks and stomped one of his hoofs. The genie palmed his face again the next time he encountered one of these creatures, hopefully never, he’d have to be a little more clear.

“You need to say ‘I wish for my home to be cleaned’ in order for me to grant your wish.” Wardah instructed slowly losing patients with the feeble creature that seemed a cross between a horse and pig. The fluffies eyes widened as if in realisation.

“Ooooooh. Den wy dummeh nu say dat in da fiwst pwace.” Oscar rolled his eyes at the genie as if the hoomin was the idiot. The genies right eye twitched at the remark but he simply took a deep breath and waited.

“Oscaw widsh dat nestie be cweanie dat dere nu poopies!” Oscar said loudly, finally making his first wish.

“Your wish has been granted!” With a blink of his eyes the shit smeared box was cleaned. The offending fluffy turds, stench and stains were instantly cleaned, the only dirty one was Oscar himself.

Oscar looked around with wide eyes, “WOOOOW!” He shouted amazed by the sight, his mouth hanging wide open. He soon began to jump about with joy.

“Weah cwean nestie!” Oscar shouted at the top of his lungs as he snuggled into the torn blankets of his home.

Ba…wy Oscaw nu smeww pwetti?" The fluffy was confused as he looked at his stained pretty red fluff.

“Because you only asked that I clean your home, not yourself.” The genie clarified as he began to grow back to his normal size. THe fluffy no longer seemed frightened coming to the realisation that the strange no legged red hoomin was a friend.

“Den Oscaw widsh dat fwuffy be cweanie!” Oscar said again wishing for himself to be clean.

“Your wish is granted.” With a blink of his eyes the genie cast the wish, however Oscar remained the same.

“Huh?” Oscar looked over his fluff, he was still filthy. “Nu am cwean. Wie!”

“I did not lie. Your wish has been granted, you didn’t specify that I was to clean you. You wished that a fluffy be clean. So a fluffy was cleaned.” The genie remarked, hiding a little smirk as the creature puffed up and stomped his hoofs.

In the distance another fluffy cried out in surprise “FWUFFY AM SMEWW PWETTI! BWEST BWITE TIME EBA!”

“Nu fwaiw! Munstah nu teww Oscaw daw wuwes! TAKE SOWWY POOPIES!” Oscar stomped his hoofs on the padding of his home. He was angry. The fluffy turned around exposing his ass and farted releasing a torrent of sorry poopies at the genie.

A frown crossed Wardah’s hardened features as the torrent soared towards him. With a click of his fingers the torrent disappeared and reappeared above Oscar dropping on top of him covering him from head to toe.

“SCREEEE!” Oscar flailed slipped in his own turds and landed on his back with a thud.

“Huuuu huuuu Oscaw mwiss owd daddeh! Oscaw nu smeww pwetti! Hu huuu widsh was wid owd daddeh!” Oscar screamed and cried as he flailed in the puddle of shit.

“Your wish is granted.” With a blink of his eyes the genie granted Oscar his wish.

“Eee?” Oscar stopped flailing confused before the world vanished, he was no longer in the alleyway or his box nestie. The meanie munstah hoomin with no leggies was gone. A strange smell filled the fluffies nose. It was dark and he was standing on something hard.

“Ware am fwuffy huuu huuu nu wike dawkies!” Oscar sobbed as his eyes frantically looked around for where he was. A dark chuckle filled the darkness as the genie’s voice sounded.

“Why, with your old daddy of course.” The voice spoke bemused as light began to illuminate the fluffy.

“SCREEEEEEE MUNSTAH!” Oscar screamed as a pair of hollow corpse eyes stared back at him. Wooden walls surrounded Oscar on all sides as the embalmed remains of his previous daddeh stared back at him.

“Now that’s not nice you did wish to be with him mwahaha!” The genie cackled as his voice began to dissipate amongst the fluffies screaming.

“NUUU WET FWUFFY OUT AM GUD FWUFFY! HUUU HUUU! NU WIKE DAWKIES! NU SMEWW PWETTII! WET FWUFFY OUT HUUUUUU!” Oscar began beating on the sides of the coffin but none would hear his cries, he was buried deep under the earth. He would sob, cry and beg, cowering away at the farthest corner all until he gasped his last breath.




This is another side story I’m writing for fun. Featuring various genie types from the forgotten realms in Dungeon’s & Dragon’s granting various wishes to fluffies who find their artifacts.

For the image I have to credit poopiest of babbehs with his help on drawing fluffies. Used his work to help draw this. And yes those are his balls.

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i was fully expecting the little idiot to wish for his box and himself to be cleaned (twice, since he did it wrong the first time) and then wave the djinn byebye while sighing about how sad he was that he doesn’t have a home anymore lol

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Hee hee, what a silly story! I like it!

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Hallofuckingween, mother fluffer!
LOL, we all knew he’d get monkey pawed after annoying the genie.

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