“Teehee. Wuna wub dancies!” Exclaimed a portly white and yellow mare as she got up on her hind legs and danced her heart out. FluffTV was currently on and showed a bunch of fluffies currently grooving to a tracklist of public domain disco music. There were even chirpies ‘dancing’, though these were just confused looking babbehs suspended with fishing line and giving peeps.
YOU GOT THE MOVES…BUT CAN YOU DO THIS?
Announced the MC, the camera focusing on a stallion who daringly stood up on one leg. Tongue sticking out as she concentrated super hard, Luna attempted to mimic the super cool ultra level dance move and went toppling down to the floor. Bottom lip curling, she thumped her hooves against the safe room floor.
“Owwies! Hab huwties! Wowstest huwties! OWWWIES!” In truth she didn’t really hurt all that much. Her safe room was not only bright and colorful but designed in such a way that most surfaces were rounded and the floor was plush, willing to take a tumble or two. Her shouting eventually got Valerie to poke her head into the room.
Nothing much to say about Valerie. Typical fluffy owner, albeit a nice one. Peeking into the safe room, she sighed. “You’re fine, baby. Oh but…” Val noticed that Luna had a bit of a messy bottom. “You’ve got a poopy butt. Come on, let’s go get a bath.”
Puffing herself a bit, Luna shook her head side to side. “Wuna nu hab pooby butt an’ dun wan baff! Nuuu!” If she just turned her head slightly she’d see that mummah was right but, alas, she didn’t much want to entertain the idea. It’s not as if Val was even mad at the fluffy. There were no bad poopies, just an issue with hygiene.
“Yes, you do. Now come on.” Val snapped her fingers which usually got Luna obediently trotting over but instead she just puffed out her cheeks brattily.
Another shake of her head. “Wuna nu am pooby butt! Stahp mummah! Stahp buwwy fwuffy wite naow pwease!” A few hoofsie stomps to show that she meant business. Sighing, Val walked over to try and scoop the beligerent mare but she zipped right past her outstretched hands and went tip-tapping down the hallway toward the kitchen.
Standing next to the refrigerator, Luna get up on her hind hooves and tore away the drawing she had made for her owner. It showed a crude circle with legs, a stick figure, a box which was supposed to be a housie, and a sun with a squiggly smile and dotted eyes. Val walked out to the kitchen looking fairly unimpressed with this tantrum.
“Wuna takin’ dis pwetty pitcheh fwom mummah. Nu am yews. An’ nebah makin’ pwetty pitcheh neba ebah!” Tucking the drawing close to her chest, she stuck out her tongue.
Val sighed. “OK, OK. No more pretty pictures. And let’s say you don’t have a poop butt. Let’s go take a bath anyways. You can play with your tub toys.” When fluffies got like this it was to not indulge them while also steering them in the direction of the behavior you wished for. It wasn’t working today because Luna just walked to her safe room and came back a few minutes later. Nursing a cup of coffee, Val rose an eyebrow. The mare had stuffed a backpack with stuff. She could see an action figure sticking out of the unzipped portion.
“Naow am wunnin’ way from yew. Wuna nu wub meanie mummah. Dun hab pooby butt.” Puffing out her cheeks, she tried to gauge Val’s reaction. Her own continued sipping her brew calmly and replied with a curt ‘OK’.
This didn’t make Luna any happier. “Wunnin’ way naow! Fowebbah bye tu mummah! Wuna am hab wots ob babbehs, an’ num skeggis, an hab bestest nyu mummah!” PBBBTTT! Luna blew a loud raspberry and got a spray of saliva everywhere. It earned a shrug from Val.
“EEEEEEEEE!” Running down the hall, Luna found herself at a dead-end. Came back squealing even louder into the kitchen. Holding open the sliding door, she watched her fluffy run out. Stopped on the back porch, turned away to look at Val.
“Am wunnin’ away!” A hesitant step forward. Valerie shrugged once again and closed the door. This sent Luna into an all-out gallop since mummah didn’t love her anymore!
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Running as far as she could, Luna didn’t stop until her weggies were well and truly tired. Stumbling under a tree, she sat down next to the trunk and sniffled. Why didn’t mummah love her anymore? Fluffies were for huggies AND wub.
“Dun hab pooby butt. Neba see mummah nebah abin.” Sniffling a bit at her unfair the world was to her, she imagined all the things mummah must be doing. Calling the powice people maybe. Doing lots of crying because she couldn’t bear a life without her precious Luna. Well maybe saddy-wawas was what mummah needed to appreciate her better.
Once her weggies started feeling less sore, she stood up shakily and began building her new nestie. Since she lived out her now it was up to her to make a comfortable place to live. A few branches got stacked together on the ground. Pretty flowers. Even a Snickers wrapper she found and happily licked a chocolate smear off. Carefully unzipping her backpack with her mouth, she dumped out all items essential to her survival. Captain Flufftastic action figure, check. A pink & purple plastic butterfly net with ‘Backyard Princess Explorer’ written on the grip in rainbow lettering. Her backyard explorer binoculars which were really a Viewfinder and showed various slides that a fluffy would find amusing. There was even a duck call which mummah had told her was a bigfoot call.
Scooping up the binocular Viewfinder carefully, she nudged the lever with one hoof. There were scenes of fluffies hugging and playing together, steaming plates of sketti, a cartoony piece of art of a house with a smiling sun hanging overhead. This made a pang of sadness go through her heart remembering that’s what her pretty picture was.
Huffing and tossing the Viewfinder down, she came to a resolution. Maybe if she did something amazing, mummah would come to the realization that she was on the wrong. Her butterfly net had a strap over the handle and with careful manuvering she led it over her neck. Taking up the duck call, it was time to go on a proper adventure.
Big puffs of breath, stopping in her tracks, blowing hard on the call. It made ‘quack!’ noises that her dumb li’l brain didn’t even realize was from a bird. Despite having one of those barnyarn animal toys.
“Hewwo, Bibfoot? Wuna am hewe. Pwease Bibfoot, am nice fwuffy.” This is what she said despite the fact that if her call worked and lured him out, she was going to pounce on him and swing the butterfly net right over his head.
Poking into a bush she blew the call, tail wagging a bit. There was nothing here but a bird’s nest filled with blue speckled eggs. This made her smile.
“Hewwo widdew eggies. Am Wuna. Teehee…yew am omwy widdew babbehs.” Backing out from the bush she continued her trek to find a mythical creature.
Stopping in front of a few flowers she happily did a skipping loop around them. Pretty! YAY! Her restless activity caused a bumblebee to lazily whirr out of the flora. Eyes growing wide, she squealed in fear and blew her duck call wildly.
“BIBFOOT HEWP WUNA IT AM BUZZY MUNSTAH!” Perhaps interested in the bright colors of her net, the bumblebee did a loop-de-loop and cut a path toward the fluffy. Dropping her duck call, Luna ran back screaming to her impromptu nestie.
++++++++
“Huuhuu…su scawy…” Shivering a bit and positioning her Captain Flufftastic action figure to act as a sentry against further munstah attacks, Luna gulped. This was a big adventure but it was so scary. If only mummah was here. But mummah didn’t love her anymore.
Laying there, it was on her mind to try and take a nap but dark clouds had gathered overhead. At first she tried to ignore it and thought dawk-times had just come earlier than expected but then water droplets began falling down onto her head.
“Nu, pwease meanie sky, nu gib Wuna wawas. Dun wan.” Of course she could have just moved off from the nest and sought comfort under the tree right next to her, but she didn’t. Such a thought had never crossed her mind. Build her place of comfort UNDER protection from the elements? Perish the thought. Instead she just sat there as the sprinkling from above turned into an all-out downpour of rain.
Sprawling out sadly on the pokey branches and trash that made up her nest, she felt as if the world was punishing her. Why punish her though? Mummah was the one in the wrong. She was…!
Just then though, there was flash of lightning. A roar of thunder that caused her heart to skip a pace in her fluffy chest. Eyes darting to look behind her, she found it.
There was poop on her butt. A lot of it. Mummah had been right all along. Even though mummah had been right, she’d been meanies and ran away from home.
Flopping around on her exposed nestie, Luna cried out to the Heavens. “WUNA AM SOWWY! WUNA AM POOBY BUTT! MISS MUMMAH! DUN ‘WAN WUN WAY! WAN MUMMAH! NU WAN BE BAD FWUFFY!”
Arms snugged up around her body, lifting her up from the now waterlogged nest. Smoothed a hand over her head.
“You’ve been out here for thirty minutes. Glad you agree though.” Giving a smile down to the fluffy, Valerie had already forgiven her for the bad behavior.
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Sitting in a tub with a perfect amount of steamy hot water, Luna giggled and splashed around happily with a few floaty toys. There was a plastic tugboat, wind-up fish, a rubber shark.
“EEEEE!” She cried out happily, smacking together the shark and tugboat to make several squeaky noises. While she busied herself with toys, mummah worked shampoo into her mane.
“Close your eyes, sweetheart.” Val told her softly, dunking a plastic cup into the water and rinsing out the suds. This process repeated itself a few times before Luna got tugged up from the bath water, shaking her fluff like a dog and causing water droplets to fly out all over the place.
Once the mare had been rubbed off with a towel and had help brushing her teeth, she got tugged up in a hugging embrace and brought off to bed. Not her bed, but mummah’s.
All snug under the comforter with her owner, Luna twitched her ears and sounded embarrassed. “Wuna sowwy ‘fo bein’ pooby butt bad fwuffy.”
Valerie stroked a hand down her head. “I know honey. I’m not mad.” Cooing a bit, Luna dragged herself up and watched videos on mummah’s phone. She really loved mummah and mummah loved her even if she was a brat.