“So you say they can be trained? I heard they were stupid.”
“Oh, to be sure they are. But they’re stupid and they can talk. You’d be surprised how stupid they can get away with being simply by being able to communicate with us. Why my Violetta-”
The grumbling old man waved off the employee. “I don’t give a shit, just give me that black one, a bag of food, and a crate for it to sleep in.” The clerk looked confused. “Sorry, crate?” The man put his face in his hand. “Christ. A kennel, kid. A carrying crate for a pet. Gimme one of those. Put a blanket or some shit in it so she has a place to sleep.”
“Well sir, they really don’t like to-”
“What part of that sounded like a question?”
…
…
Glen walked out of the Fluffmart with a petcarrier containing an excited black earthy fluffy stallion. “Fankyu fow gif fwuffy howsie! Wub nyu daddeh! Wan pway an hab sketties?” He ignored it as he reached his truck. He tossed the crate in the bed of the truck and looped his tiedown straps around it to secure it. Then he hopped in the cab amd drove home.
When he retrieved the carrier, the occupant was shivering and sobbing. “Huuuuhuhuhu tuu wowd huhuhuhuhu su windy fwaffy nu wike…” Glen groaned. Little fairy at the store better not have been jerking him around. The fuck kinda hair color is purple for a fucking man?
He brought the carrier into his modest one bedroom bungalow, out near the county line where the desert really takes over. He set it down and opened the door. After he filled a bowl with food he grunted “eat” at his new pet. The fluffy was still whimpering and babbling to itself, so he kicked the back of the kennel, and with a yelping screech the fluffy came out.
“Daddeh! Fwuffy sowwy fow be bad fwuffy! Nu wan be in sowwy boxy nu mowe!”
Well shit. Glen didn’t love the accent. “Hey, quit talking like such a fruitcake. It’s pissing me off.” The fluffy made a puzzled look. “Nu unnastan, wat bestest daddeh meen?”
“Fuck me that is obnoxious. Okay, you can understand me, that’s enough. You do what I tell you to do, and you don’t talk unless I ask you a question. Got it?”
The nervous fluffy nodded. “Uh huh! Fwuffy goddit!” Good. That takes care of that.
“I’ll feed you in the morning and at night. You sleep in that box, whenever I want to pet you, I’ll come get you. I’m gonna go drink a beer and catch the end of the Knights game. Think the 3rd’s about half over. Then I’ll come get you so I can pet you while I watch my programs.”
He turned to leave and the fluffy was still confused. “Wait daddeh, fwaffy nu knu wat aww dis am-” Fast as lighting, an open hand smack hit the brown fluffy in the side of his snout, sending him tumbling over sideways. “The fuck did I say? You don’t talk unless I fucking tell you to. Do it again, I’ll beat your goddamned snout off.”
The fluffy squeaked and clutched his nose with his hoofies. He was crying but he didn’t dare make a sound. Daddeh walked away and the fluffy exhaled. Standing up, he went to the crate. It seemed so much safer now.
He was two rooms away from daddeh, so he soon forgot his fears and started playing with the blanket like it was a babbeh. “Hewwow wittew babbeh, am mummah! Whewe mummah miwkie pwace? Nu wowwy babbeh, hab squishy nummies!”
He was entertaining himself and finally relaxing. Then, he heard a thumping. Daddeh burst in and smacked him in the top of his head hard.
“No! Fucking! Talking! Good! Pets! Don’t! Talk!” With each word, he struck the fluffy with an open hand. When he was done, the fluffy was bruised and whimpering, bleeding from the nose and mouth. Daddeh grabbed his nonos and he was suddenly very afraid.
"If I hear any noise out of you, I’m gonna crush these, tear them off, and make you eat them."
The fluffy sat back, defeated. Terrified and alone after daddeh left, he cried softly into his fluff. He wanted hope, but all he had were questions he couldn’t even ask.
…
“Yeah, no, it’s great. Yeah they’re dumb as shit but I’ve never seen a dog take criticism before. No, that’s the best part! Quiet! He kept trying to talk the other night so I disciplined him. I swear it’s like a dog with a remote. Quiet, soft, and doesn’t need any attention.”