Munstah Daddeh Game part 3 Final (by ChefFoe)

Brandon was mad. Mad at himself for letting a fluffy make him loose his cool. He knew better than that, than to let those shitrats get a better of him, but the mare had no reason to hate him. He wasnt the one making the choices that hurt her babies. She should be thankful he didnt just kill her and all her little shitlings. That didnt matter now, the show must go on. He grabbed some cleaning utensils and began to clean the blood up.
“Now,” Brandon said in a cheerful tone “you see what happens when you dont pick a choice, your babbeh dies.”

Lavender simply stared at the bloody stain that was Basil. Her little green babbeh loved giving huggies. Now he would never hug again. Sadness swelled up in her heart. She couldnt stop crying. Another emotion snuck in her mind, fear. Fear for her other foals, fear for herself, and fear for what had happened to her special friend Bourbon. If this munstah had gotten to him like he said. What did he do to him? That made Lavender shiver.

“Do you understand?” Brandon said while leaning closer “I will give your babbehs forever sleepies if you dont choose.”
“Nu wan fowevew sweepies! Huuhuu!” Berry cried out in fear.
“Wai miwstew gibe fowevew sweepies to buddah Basiw?” Huuhuu." Cried Cinnamon
Mint simply cried while cuddling Berry.
“Wa…Wavendew undewstand.” Lavender said meekly.
“Alrighty then!” Brandon said, getting back into the gameshow mood. “Your next choice is, which foal do you want to play the game?”

Lavender had to think, fast. She knew the man would hurt her other babbehs, but what babbeh would be able to handle it better first. Berry was the closest to Lavender’s colors, she loved that very much. Cinnamon’s red fluff was her favorite color, he looked like his daddeh. And little Mint, her small, special, no-wingie no-pointy babbeh. She didnt want anymore hurties for her babbehs. She had to choose. She had to.

“Bewwy…am nexties.” Lavender said sadly.
“Very well Mummah!” Brandon said happily “come here little one.” He outstretched his hand towards Berry. Berry saw the large hand come closer and she screamed.
“Nuuu! Nu gibe huwties to Bewwy!” Berry used her stubby legs to run about 10 inches before Brandon’s hand grabbed her. She started to bawl, a torrent of tears came from her eyes.
“MUMMAH, Wai nu hewp Bewwy?! Mummah nu wuv Bewwy?” Berry cried out as she was brought closer to Brandon.
“Mummah wuv aww babbehs! Just…nu…can hewp…” Lavender sadly trailed into silence.
Brandon was enjoying the discourse of the small fluffy family. Thats when an evil seed of an idea began to sprout in his head. He scanned all the foals while he was bringing the purple one closer. No, Not the red one. Brandon thought. Then his eyes landed on the small white earthie. He remembered, he made a promise to Bourbon earlier. That would have to wait. He had this one to play with.
He brought up the foal to his eye level and looked at it.
“Scawy!” Berry exclaimed
PHTTHHHP
She shit. In terror.
Brandon raised his brow. He was mostly used to grown fluffs. A lot of them didnt make scardie poopies often. Foals on the other hand, were a different story. In all honesty, he should have been suprised the green one didnt shit on him. He simply sighed and grabbed the hose under the table. Washing it down the drain on the table. He also washed the foal clean. Its “wawa am bad fo fwuffy” speech ignored by him.
“Well, now that we’ve cleaned up, are you ready for your next choice?” Brandon asked Lavender
“Y…yus.” She replied
“Alright.” Brandon said while reaching behind him and bringing forth a large pair of scissors. He snipped them in the air, and turned to Lavender.
“Now what would you prefer I snip, your baby’s hearie places or smellie place?” He said with a growing grin

Lavender had to think. Her babbehs would get hurt, nothing she could do to stop that. He had shown that with her Basil. All she could do is make the choice that caused the least pain to them.
“Heawie pwaces.” Lavender said flatly. She would give them all the huggies in the world afterwards. They just needed to live now.

“Good choice,” Brandon said.
“Nuuu, nu huwt heawie pwaces!” Berry protested, to no avail.
Brandon slide the foals left ear between the scissors. Slowly he closed them, wanting to maximize the amount of pain it would feel.
“SCRREEEEEE!” Berry yelled “Wowstest huwties!” Pain shot down the foal face and down her back. The cold sharpness of the blades radiated like dry ice.
SHHHHIINK
The scissors closed with brutal efficiency. The small bloodied ear dropped to the table. Blood ran down the foals face, causeing it to panic more. Brandon simply went to the right ear, slicing it as if were paper.
SHINK
That ear plummeted off the table.
“Oops!” Brandon exclaimed “gotta be careful here.” He nonchalantly dropped the foal onto the table to scoop up the ear and drop it into the biohazard bin.
“Huuuhuuu, haf so many huwties Mummah!” Berry cried “Bewwy need huggies fo huwties!”
“Ah not so fast!” Brandon laughed as he grabbed the fleeing foal “we havent made all the choices yet!”
Berry flailed in his grasp, making no real difference. She battered her hooves on his fingers to get him to let go. She was going to try everything she could to get away from the munstah.
“If you dont calm down, ill shake you like a can of soda” Brandon threatened. Berry stopped, now crying to herself.
“Now Mummah. On to the next choice!” Brandon said “what leggies do you want her to keep? Her back legs or front legs?” Brandon grew a wicked smile afterwards.

This was no man. This is a munstah. Plain and simple. That was Lavender’s first thought after hearing the choice. Her mind was going a mile a minute. She had to choose carefully.

“Take back weggies.” Lavender said. “Stiww can gib huggies if habe fwont weggies.” Tears streamed down her face as she doomed her child.
“Absolutely excellent choice!” Brandon exclaimed “it seems your mummah really loves you.” He spun the foal around and layed it flat on the table.
“NUUU HUWT WEGGIES! SCRREEEEEEE!” Berry screeched “NED WEGGIES FO WUN AN PWAY!” Her squirming was as violent as she could muster. Her eyes filled with tears that could barely see her mummah. Her mummah stared at her, but didnt move. Her mummah only cried.
“MUMMAH SABE BEWWY!” Berry pleaded “BEWWY WUV MUMMAH, MUMMAH NO WUV BEWWY?”
Lavender reached forwards with her hoof. She wantsd to reach her baby. Her little Berry.
Brandon was almost euphoric with the suffering from them. He was enjoying the moment so much he practically didn’t notice the mare reaching for her baby. Almost. He saw her and smacked her hoof.
“Nu uh uh. No touching yet.” Brandon chastised
Brandon quickly grabbed the foals back left hoof tightly. He was gonna make this last.
“NUU HUWT WEGGIES!” Berry’s pleades going unanswered “NU HUWT…”
CRACK
Brandon twisted her leg till it had broke. The foal stopped screaming for a second, just to process the pain.

It was the worstest hurties ever. It spiked its way thru her back and to her brain. The intensity of the sharp pain was enough to stun her, but for only a moment.

SCCCCCRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEE
Berry was flailing about, doing everything in her power to get away. Her wiggling only made Brandon strengthen his efforts. He gipped the broken leg hard, causing a bolt of pain to sear its way through Berry. He smiled with joy as the foal screeched. “Such great music” Brandon though. He gave the leg a quick spin and pull. The muscles and skin tore and snapped. Berry heaved onto the table from pain, her voice sore from screaming. Lavender was breaking down in tears, to ashamed to look at berry. Her siblings cluched each other in terror. Pain radiated from her back. Suddenly, wap her torn leg was tossed in front of her.
“WEGGIE!” Berry squealed, and vomited. Her struggles were all in vain, as Brandon’s grip was vice-like, to which escape as impossible. Brandon grabbed the other leg, gripping it between pointer and thumb. He did a pinching and twist motion, bunching up the muscles. This caused Berry to struggle in agony. He quickly spun and pulled it off, there was one last choice for this foal he need to get to.
The tearing and snapping of bones and muscles cause Berry to have a seizure, all her muscles tensed and her eyes rolled back. Her breathing stopped and she began to leak spit out of her mouth. Looking like a beached goldfish, Brandon released her and grabbed the hose. He quickly splashed Berry with the cold water. He had done this many times.
“WAWA AM BAD FO FWUFFY!” She screamed, she was breathing heavily. She no longer had the energy to do anything. She simple stayed right there and breathed slowly.
Brandon’s quick thinking had saved her, because of his previous experience, he knew that splashing water would soft reset a fluffy. There biological programming making them cry out, in turn shutting off all other thoughts or actions.
“Look that wasnt so bad.” Brandon said while drying the foal with a hand towel. The small fluffy simply whimpered in his grasp. He then wiped up the water from the table and placed the foal back down.
“cu…cuwdie…” Berry said meekly.
“Alright, we all ready for the next choice?” Brandon asked in a mock fashion. He turned around to the toolbox behind him and pulled out a pocket knife and a long, thick sewing pin.
“Now for the last choice, should your baby get sliceie hurties or get stabie hurties?” He asked with a creeping malic in his voice.

Lavender was staring at her baby. A hollow feeling came over her. She wasnt sure how to describe it. All she wanted was for them to not suffer anymore. She would give anything. Her baby wouldnt be able to survive either, both would surely kill her baby. Suddenly, as her thoughts cleared, She thought back to the rules the man had set.
There was one thing she could do.

“Gib stabie huwties to Wavendew.” Lavender said, walking towards Brandon. “Yu say that Wavendew can take huwties fo babbeh instead, that was wule.”
Brandon smiled. The rules were right, she could do that. Most fluffies would never volunteer for pain, even if it was their children. This mare was different, very different. Brandon liked that, made things more interesting.
“Thats correct,” Brandon said “I’ll give you the hurties instead”
With a swift motion, Brandon plunged the sewing needle into Lavender’s left front leg. It went clean through, and was quickly pulled out in a flash.
Lavender hardly had time to register that the needle had gone in and out of her leg before an explosion of a cold, sharp anguish bolted over her leg. It ran up her leg to her head, it was unbearable.
“SCREEE, WOWSTEST HUWTIES!” Lavender screamed involuntarily. She reared back and sat down. She held her leg close. “dis am what babbehs hab been feewing” she thought “no desewbe to compwain, am bad mummah.
She gritted her teeth and took deep breathes. Through her tears she stared at the man. He had a large toothy grin on his face. She hated it.
“Can hab babbeh back now?” Lavender asked “Babbeh need huggies.”
Brandon gently handed over the foal to her. She clenched the baby tight to her. The foal hardly had any energy to say anything, its mind numb with pain. Lavender gently rocked her little Berry back and forth. She now understood a little of what the man had put her babies through, it made her hate him more.
“YU AM MUNSTAH! YU AM WOWSTEST EBAH!” Cinnamon yelled out. Tears ran down his face, but a look of anger was behind them.
Brandon stared down the foal with malice. He scooped up the little shit amd turned to Lavender.
“Looks like we got a volunteer for the next round!” Brandon said “Are you ready?”
“Wet go!” Cinnamon demanded while struggling
Lavender looked at her Cinnamon. He had sealed his fate with that outburst, the man wouldnt be merciful after that.
“Alright, lets get to our first choice!” Brandon exclaimed, returning to his gameshow host voice. “What would you rather your baby keep? His right eye or his left eye?”
“take wight see-ie place.” Lavender said, her judgment swift.
“Hm, that was fast.” Brandon said as he grabbed the foals face.
“NUUU! NU TAKE SEEIE PWACE!” Cinnamon protested. He squirmed and wiggled to escape Brandon’s grasp, but such as history repeates, it was to no avail. Brandon placed his thumb at the bottom right of its eyesocket. He pushed in and up.
“SCREEEEEEE” Cinnamon screamed, the pain radiating across his skull.
Brandon continued to worm his thumb into the socket. Trying to contest with the foal shaking its head back and forth. Until finally
POP
The eye flung free of its confines. Brandon quickly grasped it and with all his force, crushed it like a sour grape.
The pain was so intense that Cinnamon thought he was going to die. The pain blasted from his eye and down his whole body, like a bolt of lightning piercing through him.
“WOWSTEST HUWTIES EBAH!” Cinnamon screeched with all his might. “MUMMAH SABE CINNAMON! HEWP!”
Lavender knew she could do nothing. She simply watched.
Brandon turned and snapped the optical cord, then chucked the squished mess into the trash. This caused another round of screaming from Cinnamon. Cinnamon’s breathing had become labored. His struggles had come to a full stop. This monster was gonna hurt him, and he could do nothing about it.
“See, that wasnt so bad!” Brandon mocked “ready for the next one?” He didn’t wait for an answer, the little foal had wrongful yelled at him, so he didnt care about its feelings. He went to the cabinet behind him and grabed a large clear cup. Then went into the toolbox and grabbed a large lighter. He turned back to the table and using the hose, filled up the cup with cold water.
“Ok, choice time!” Brandon said “what should happen to him, dunked in water for 30 seconds or have a lighter on him for 10 seconds?”

Lavender thought. She knew water was extra bad for fluffies. Burning hurt, apparently it hurt so bad sometimes it didn’t go away. She knew what one she need to pick. The one that would have her baby live.

“Buwnie huwties…” Lavender said.
“Good choice.” Brandon mused
Brandon turned the foal upside down, exposing its back. He flicked the lighter on and brought it up to its back. The smell of buring fluff emanated from the lighter.
“SCREEEEE, BUWNIE HUWTIES!” Cinnamon cried out in pain. The intense heat causing all his muscles to try and avoid its radiant touch. The grip he was in allowed for not movement, and he was forced to exept all the fire the lighter had to offer. His fluff had quickly burnt away leaving his soft flesh to be cooked. He was like a turkey on a spit that wasnt being rotated, the flesh began to sizzle and the pain was too much. Cinnamon wanted it to stop.
Then it did. Brandon had turned off the lighter and then dunked the foals back into the water to end the flames. Brandon looked at the foals back, second degree burns. The foals skin was more resistant than he had thought. Slightly impressed he put the foal on the cold table. The foal simply breathed heavily, obviously still in pain. Brandon and Cinnamon looked at the Lavender.
“One last choice. Hope your ready.” Brandon said, gaining a large grin. He pulled the pocket knife out again and flicked it open. “Now, what does he get to keep, his special wumps or his no-no stick?”
“NUU! NU HUWT CINNAMON SPECIAL PWACE!” Lavender screamed “HUWT WAVENDEW INSTEAD! GIB WAVENDEW HUWTIES!”
Her begging screams were like a fine classical piece to Brandon’s ears. He wanted to soak all her anguish in. It was divine.
“Are you sure?” Brandon asked “Its a lot of hurties?”
“YUS, YUS.” Lavender said loudly “NU CAWE WHAT HAPPEN TO WAVENDEW!” her eyes filled with a panicked looked. Tears streamed down like a rainstorm.
“mummah…” Cinnamon said meekly. He looked right as her as she sacrificed herself to the man for him. He didnt want his mummah to have any hurties. He looked over at his siblings. Berry was cluched in her hoof clearly in pain. Her legs had stopped bleeding and her breath was slow. Mint was curled in a ball, panicking and crying. She was sulking her hoof, trying her hardest to not look.
“Alright, then ill take your horn.” Brandon said
Lavender felt her stomach drop. Her pointy part. He was gonna take it. She looked down at her precious babies. There was nothing she wouldn’t do for them. She would go through it, for them.
Without any time to brace herself, Brandon grasped Lavender’s horn and pulled to the side and back. He began to whip everywhich direction. Doing his damndiest to crack it off.
Lavender’s head was exploding in pain, like a tooth being pulled with no novicane. The deepest root of her skull was aching.
“SCREEEE!” She screamed
krik
Her horn was slowly giving, no harder than a tooth, it could be broken. The small crack had made pain shoot through her head, like a gun had shot her, the bullet of pain traveled to her spine. Massive pressure was making itself know on her head.
crrk
More cracking, more pain. Till finally
CIRCK
The sound of a hard bone snaping had been made, and in Brandon’s hand was her horn. The stump it had come from was bleeding. The blood ran down her face and dripped onto the table. He would need to get the heavy duty cleaner tonight. He placed the horn on the table behind him, he would find a use for it.
Cinnamon stared at his mother. She had taken such pain for him. She had lost her pointy part for him. She did love them, more than he ever knew. He slowly got to his legs and began to wobble his way to her. With every move his back stinged, his seeie place pulsed with pain. But his mummah needed huggies, just as much as he did.
“Mummah!” Cinnamon cried out “Cinnamon hewe to gib huggies and wuv to male aw bettew!”
Lavender’s head hurt so bad. It was like nothing she had known. It blurred her vision, and her head thumped with each pulse. She was in so much pain. Then she heard it. Her Cinnamon crawling over to her, to give her hugs. She grabbed him and held him softly, so she wouldnt hurt his back. She looked over at Mint. She was next.
“Alright, down to our final player!” Brandon said with excitement. He then picked up Mint, and placed her in the palm of his hand.
“Are you ready?” He asked. Mint simply cried.
“Your choice is would you rather have her give huggies to her brother or sister?”

“What…” Lavender said flabbergasted. Did he just ask which one she should give huggies too. Why would he make that the choice? What was going on.

“Bewwy.” She said placing Berry down. Brandon placed Mint next to her. Mint quickly embraced Berry.
“Huggies make ebehyting bettew!” Mint said.
Lavender was at a loss. What was he doing?
“Alright, next choice.” He said with a suspicious smile “do you want me to give her pets or uppies?”
Lavender stared at him. Nothing was making sense. He hurt all her babies, but Mint, he wasnt hurting her. Why?
“Gib…pets?” She said in a questioning tone
Brandon reached his hand over to Mint and gently pet her. Running his hand over her fluff. Mint was just as confused as her mother. He finshed petting her and looked at Lavender. His smile betrayed his kind acts.
“Alright ready for the last one?” He asked, a scheme coming to fruition. “Mint can ask any questions she wants or she can have some nummies.”

Lavender couldnt believe this. This monster was being nice to Mint. No answer came to her mind as of why. She had so many questions, like why was he doing this, where was Bourbon, or if they could leave.

Mint looked up at the man. She only had one question on her mind right now.
“Wai yu am huwt mummah sissie and buhdah? What am dey do?” Mint asked
Brandon looked down at the foal. He forced a soft smile and simply said “beacuse they are monsters, just like me.”

Lavender’s world dropped. He had only hurt her babies that were like her. She was called a monster by her old herd. She was almost killed several times by her own mother simply for existing. She had been lucky that Bourbon had wanted her, him being a poopie fluffy, he still outranked her in the terms of the herd. Thats why she loved Bourbon. She had cursed her babies to be monsters, to be hated. She was a bad mummah.

“But dey am no munstah.” Mint said “dey am just fwuffie”
Mint was confused, it was just her mother and siblings.
“They have wings and a horn, that makes them monsters, and monsters get hurties.” Brandon said “unlike you, you are just a perfect fluffy.”
Brandon carefully scooped up mint and brought her close. He gently stroked her fur, he soft smile directed at her. Mint cooed softly and relaxed. This man wasn’t going to hurt her.
“How would you like to be my fluffy?” He asked her
“Weawwy!?” Mint exclaimed, her eyes beaming brightly only to dim back down “but…yu gib huwties to mummah…”
“Oh, but they deserved it.” He said “they are monsters after all.”
Mint looked back at her mummah. Lavender’s face was plastered with a look of terror and realization. Mint looked down at her siblings. Berry was hardly responsive, Cinnamon was tightly hugging Lavender, and Basil was nothingness. If that was the fate of monsters, then she wanted no part. Regardless if they were family.
“Lets have the final choice now huh?” Brandon said before Mint could say anything
Lavender looked over at the awful man. What terrible scheme could he have planned now?
“For your final choice,” Brandon mused “which would you rather?”
Brandon held forward the small foal in his arms to Lavender. His big grin stretched ear to ear.
“I get to keep Mint here, but i find all of you nice homes with no more hurties and you get to see Bourbon or you keep mint and i place you back outside but you dont get to see Bourbon.” He explained “Which would you rather have?”

Lavender brain was barraged with emotion. The pain thumped from her head. She would never let this man have any of her babies, but she wanted to see Bourbon so badly. What could she do? The foals she held in her arms wouldnt be able to survive outside anymore, especially Berry. In her heart she knew what she had to do.

“T…Take Wavendew instead.” She said “dah wuwes says that Wavendew can take chooceies instead, then keep Wavendew an gib babbehs homesies.”
Brandon was shocked. Genuinely. Never once in his time of playing the game did a fluffy not make the selfish choice. Even though she knew how he thought of them, she still chose to save her children. His plan to make Mint into Bourbon’s special friend was ruined.
Brandon smiled gently, and handed Mint to Lavender. He looked at her, surprisingly her face was one of pure conviction. She wouldn’t back down from this. He was sort of impressed by her spirit.
“If thats your choice, then so be it.” Brandon said “Ill keep you and give your babies a nice home.”
“Yu am say Wavendew can see Bouwbon, whewe am Bouwbon?” Lavender asked
Brandon smiled, he walked to the large black box that had been in the back of the room the whole time.
“Hes been with us the whole time” Brandon explained “Let me get him out.”
Brandon unlocked the box and opened it up. Immediately, crying could be coming from inside the box. Lavender knew it was Bourbon, she could tell by his voice. As Brandon grabbed Bourbon and lifted him, Lavender’s face transformed into one of terror. Bourbon was legless, had only one eye, and his tail was gone. Tears and snot caked his face, he had been crying the entire time. His voice was strained, possibly from screaming in the cube.
Lavender couldnt believe it was him, what that monster had dont to him. He had butchered him. As Brandon gently placed Bourbon down on the table, Lavender scooted over to him.
“Bouwbon am sowwy!” Bourbon shouted " Bouwbon am wowstest daddeh ebah!" His crying on increased
“Wha… Wai Bouwbon say dat?” Lavender asked
“His last choice,” Brandon explained “was either his special lumps or his family. You can see what he chose.”
Lavender looked at Bourbon, his crying only continued. The foals had gathered around there father and hugged him. Trying their best to make him feel better. She was shocked. A thousand thoughts ran through her brain. She felt betrayed, anger, sadness, and finally understanding.
“Wavendew undewstand.” Lavender say with a soft smile “Bouwbon have no weaw choice.”
Bourbon looked over at Lavender, her smile told him everything. She wasnt mad at him, she had firsthand experience of the monster.
Brandon simply turned was to hide is outright anger. " “No real choice” she says" Brandon thought “how dare that little rat…” He calmed himself, after all, she was his now. He could always play the Game when he wanted to.
“Well, now that everyones together, lets get you all patched up!” Brandon said with a false care in his voice.
He walked over to the cabinet, put on some gloves, and pulled out the HappyFluff Bio-healing gel and two small cloth towels. He walked back to the table, with one towel he soaked in water. He then grabbed Berry very carefully out of Lavender’s grasp.
“Nu huwt Bewwy!” Lavender protested
“Calm down.” Brandon said stonely “I have to handle the foals to heal them.”
He then gently wiped Berrys back leg stumps, then moved to her ears. He hadnt cut too deep into the ears for them to loose complete hearing. She would definitely look weird to others. He applied some of the biogel in both areas to stimulate healing. He then gave Berry back to Lavender and grabbed Cinnamon. Cinnamon tried to struggle, but gave up quickly. Brandon took the water rag and patted down his back, just enough to clean it. He then wiped around the missing eye hole. Afterwards he applied the biogel again, and handed him back.
“Alrighty Lavender, you’re next.” He said while ringing out the water rag. He wiped her horn and leg, then applied the gel. Simple as always.
“Now its time to go to the saferoom ok.” Brandon said to the fluffies “Ill have to set it up for foals later tonight, but it will do for now.”
Brandon grabbed a large laundry basket that was layered with blankets from the corner of the room. He gently placed all of them in it. After making sure they were comfortable, he took them inside and to the “saferoom”. After getting them out of the basket, he turned on the tv and opend a small bag of kibble into a bowl for them. He looked down at them, Bourbon was in his “chair” with Lavender laying next to him. Both had stopped crying for now, Berry and Cinnamon both layed with Bourbon. Clearly they missed their father. The odd one out was Mint. She stayed close but not as close. His words had clearly affected her. That was good, he could make that work. He walked back to the Game Room and began to clean. He turned off the camera, certainly he got good footage, and started to clean and sanitize the table. After all the blood and other fluids were cleaned from it, he stood back and admired his room. Such a lovely lab for the pain of fluffies. As he left the room to go out shopping and setting up adoption listings for the foals, he looked back into the room. Brandon smiled, knowing this room would have much more fun intailed in its future.

Notes: this took so long to finish, ill probably come back to this someday. I appreciate anyone who has enjoyedthis story. I have much more coming in the future

24 Likes

What twist! Lol I am no fan of pain and torture but I just can’t look away, enjoyed reading it a lot!

1 Like

Nice! Your story still has so much potential, hope you pick it up again sometime.

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That was so well written! Every part is just magic!

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Really good stuff. Thanks for posting.

Imagine if Saw series wasn’t nearly as dumb. LOL, this is actually written well.