Dodo was a happy fluffy. He had a warm house, a sketti day every week, lots of toysies, and his daddeh had said he’d consider getting him a pretty mare as a special friend if he was good.
And all he had to do was behave and make sure he made good poopies.
Dodo felt the need to make poopies. Quickly getting up from where he’d been playing with a stuffed toy he trotted over to the litterbox and turned around to ensure that all the poopies stayed inside.
A few hours later Dodo’s owner Steve came back.
“Were you a good fluffy while I was gone, Dodo?”
“Yes, Daddeh! Dodo was gud fwuffy!”
“And did you make sure all of your poop went in the litterbox?”
“Yes, Daddeh! Dodo made aww gud poopies!”
Steve pulled a tiny set of tweezers out of his jacket pocket. Then he leaned over and used them to pick something off the floor. He then pulled out an ultra-high magnification magnifying glass and held it up to the thing he picked off the floor.
It was a particle of poop slightly smaller than a grain of sand. Dodo had accidentally knocked it out of the litterbox while getting out of it after pooping.
“Do you see this, Dodo? I have given you everything but you’ve befouled my house.”
“Pwease, Daddeh! Dodo nu mean tu make bad poopies!”
Steve pulled out a sledgehammer.
“And now I must punish you. I want you to know I take no pleasure in this act.”
“DADDEH, NU!”
Steve smashed Dodo with the sledgehammer. Dodo’s blood and organs exploded out of him as his body was obliterated. The poop still inside his digestive tract sprayed across the walls of the room.
Steve continued hitting Dodo’s corpse with the sledgehammer long after the fluffy had died. By the time he was done there wasn’t an inch of the room not covered in fluffy debris.
Breathing heavily, Steve set down the sledgehammer and surveyed the room.
“Ungrateful, no good, piece of shit fluffy making a mess in my house! I sure showed him!”
Steve then made a calendar note to stop at the local fluffmart and buy a new fluffy the next day.
Hopefully it wouldn’t take a year to train this one like it had with Dodo.
