Product Catalogue: Safe Room and General Care (by FluffyLandCityCouncil)

Are you new to owning a fluffy and wish there was a place to look up all available products for your pet? Look no further then our product catalogue! We are also always willing to add new products based on customer demend (wink wink)

Hydro-Blankie
A blanket used to help keep your fluffy warm in the night. It is made from a mixture of Polar Fleece and novel hydrogel fiber. The polar fleece serves to insulate your fluffy from outside temperature, while the hydrogel fiber helps with temperature regulation due to water’s high thermal capacity. Available in foal, teen and adult sizes

Hydro-Bed
Similar to the Hydro-Blankie, using hydrogel as the main material. Water is contained in a highly cross-linked polymer network, creating a viscoelastic solid. This provides comfort by changing shape under the fluffy’s weight, while also providing resistance to help keep good sleeping posture. As a bonus, the bed also applies the ‘cold side of the pillow’ feeling over the entire body. Comes in foal, teen and adult sizes

Fluffy Safe Carpet
This is carpet made for fluffies, engineered for maximum comfort and functionality. The tuffs of nylon are coated with durable waterproof coating (DWC) making them flameproof and waterproof, while the auxetic microfoam backing provides comfortable resistance. The microporous structure also makes it compatible with hydronic systems

Home HVAC System
Not necessarily a fluffy exclusive product, but no safe room is complete without one. This is a hydronic system using liquid water for HVAC (Heating, Ventilation and Air Conditioning) functions that can easily be hooked to any safe room, provided the house can accommodate such a system. It includes a PTC boiler (sere-regulating water heating), a novel ionocaloric chiller (gas-free cooling, meaning no gas leakage), pumps and HVAC controls. Keep your fluffy cool or warm at an affordable price

Fluffyland Fluffy Feed
These are food especially made to fill a fluffy’s dietary needs, as well as aid in biological development. The standard kibble is made from fresh ingredients that are hydrolyzed (broken by water molecules) to allow better absorption by the digestive system, boosting nutrition and minimizing waste. It is then irradiated to increase shelf life, bringing the price down to affordable levels, and reinforced with organic and inorganic compounds that are proven to bring various health benefits. Also comes in SoonMummah kibble (helps the developing ‘tummeh babbehs’) and Mummah kibble (increases milk quality and quantity)

Warning: as per the new legislation passed by the federal government, any and all economic activity with Fluffyland and its associates is illegal under charge of treason. Do not attempt to buy these products if you live outside the region, it is not worth the risk

AMOLED Fluff TV
No safe room is complete without one of these. This Active-Matrix Organic Light Emitting Diode (AMOLED) TV is a low cost, low power, high resolution television tunned to the FluffyTV channel, which hosts shows like Babies! and Cooking Mummah. A standard set comes with hoof friendly controls for audio and brightness

Speaker Sets
These are Bluetooth speakers that can be placed on walls with GeckoTape, a type of chemical free adhesive. They can be programmed with songs, alarms and voice lines, and all these can be set to play at specific times, all from an app in your phone. A must for any safe room or FluffyMart

LumenPaper
Let there be light! This specially made Kraft Paper wallpaper has Strontium Aluminate based phosphor paints. During the day, they will be energized by the UV and visible light, and at night reemit this energy in low intensity light. This provides an energy free way to keep fluffies from having to sleep in complete darkness, showcased to be detrimental to mental health

FoalLight
Not to be confused with a FoalBright (you sick fucks), this night light is designed to aid fluffies in sleeping better at night. It is a LED lamp in the shape of either Uni the Unicorn, Pip the Pegasus or Eddy the Earth Fluffy. The glass is a specialty polarized laminated glass that blocks harmful wavelengths of light, keeping your fluffy’s eyes safe. Very good alone or combined with LumenPaper

2-in-1 Litter Box
This litter box is a single piece construct that can accommodate adults and foals, being cheaper than buying two separate ones. Every first buy comes with a free Fluffy Fecology Quick Guide so you can learn to access your fluffy’s health by examining their ‘poopies’

Cyclic Food/Water Dispenser
This simple electromechanical device is made to help you control how much your fluffy eats and drinks while you’re away from home. Portions per day, Grams per Portion, Treats (extra food on demand), etc, all can be controlled via app or manually

Heating/Cooling Tray
These Copper Anodized Aluminum trays can be put over any heat or cold source to keep foods like spaghetti warm or foods like jello cold. Easy to clean and anti-stick

Standard Toysie Pack
Buy all the toys your fluffy could want or need in a single pack and gain a HUGE discount. Includes three balls (thermoplastic polyurethane construction), ten blocks (softwood core with microcellular plastic covering), ball pit (TPU balls, safe for all ages) stuffy friend (triple layer, double stitching for durability, hemp stuffing, DWC coating, artificial scenting), climbing tower (for foals, oval plastic windows for safety), tunnel (modular, allows various shapes)

Panic Button
Electronic alarm that either sends a notification to your phone, sounds an actual alarm, contacts local authorities, or all of the above

11 Likes

Giving fluffies a panic button sounds like a very shortsighted idea

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I’m sure that’d work out well. Ran out of Nummies? Panic button. Bug in the corner? Panic button. Denied spaghetti? Panic button. Babbeh fell over? Panic button. Miss daddeh? Panic button. Bad dream? Panic button. Litterbox smells? Panic button. Horny? Panic button. Forgot where their legs are? Panic button. Bored? Panic button. Curious? Panic button. Wants attention? Panic button. Forgot what the panic button does? Panic button. Remembered what the panic button does? Panic button. Panic button? Panic button.

Imagine being the lunatic that okayed hooking something like that up to the 911 system. The things emergency services would do to you after just a week of having to respond to fluffy problems…

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Indeed, but with the number of abusers out there, some people would rather be safe instead of sorry

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Until you remember abusers are a thing

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Abusers might be a thing but them breaking into your house to kick your fluffy’s ass is a whole lot less likely than the fluffy just pushing the button because it’s stupid as fuck

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Abusers are addicts, there comes a point in which normal abuse doesn’t cut it anymore, so they must seek new thrills

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Why not just have a normal security system if you’re so afraid of people breaking in and raping your fluffy? You know, a system that doesn’t send 700 false alarms every day because it’s bored and has no sense of proportion.

I think it’s a funny idea and you should keep it in your catalogue. I just wish all the entries had the same level of humorous insanity.

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That’s the funniest goddamn thing I’ve read all day. ‘Forgot where their legs are’ is peak

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Right, but like, when they’re breaking into houses, that’s not a fluffy abuse matter anymore—it’s a criminal act. And I’d rather have a security system that works than one that makes a priority 1 call every five minutes because it thinks the alicorn monster in the TV is going to eat it.

The idea is really funny, and I support it; but you seem to be trying to defend it as a serious suggestion. It’s not going to work as one. It’s just not. And honestly I think it is best thing you came up with here because it’s funny.

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Ok, fair enough. I’m saving the insanity for the abuse catalogue, by the way

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I would not buy any of these but I am excited to see an abuse catelogue!

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Well, it’s world building, and God knows we have enough boring, mundane crap in the world to make the simulation seem real :ahahaha:

NOW selling a fake fluffy panic button, a’la the Fluffy Fun Phone from @Ace 's Fun Backyard Sleepover! brings up all sorts of mischievous plot angles ~

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I like the idea of a “panic button” as something owners would buy an immediately regret

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I keep picturing the panic button as one of those stupid branded buttons Staples used to have. Fluffies screaming, house burning down, hoomuns methed to the gills, and all the button says is, “That was easy!”

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