Quite a Trick [by Virgil]

The bell on the front door of the Fluffy Funtime Daycare jingled
As the door was opened, a steady stream of fluffspeak came babbling through, like water cresting a berm.
“Yes! Yes! For the thousandth time yes!”
The man’s gentle smile beamed down at the dirty green pegasus that was wiggling excitedly in his arms
"I just have to get you enrolled and you can have all of those things and even more!
The little fluffy’s mind seemed to overflow, wondering what other wonders might await him in Daycare.

Harriet came to the reception desk and grinned at the scene. This is what she lived for. It was always so wonderful seeing happy fluffies and happy owners.
“Well hello there! I’m Miss Harriet, the owner of Fluffy Funtime Daycare! What can I do for you today?”
The little fluffy couldn’t contain himself
The man chuckled and shook his head in good humor
“Hi Miss Harriet, I’m sorry I seem to have gotten my sweet boy a bit too excited. I’m here to enroll him in daycare, please.”
“Why certainly! We’ll be absolutely pleased to have him here with us. Once we get the paperwork started you and he can go and meet all the other fluffies and sitters. Does he have a name?”
“Well, no, actually I just adopted him this morning and I hadn’t given him a name yet, but I think I know what to call him, now.”
The fluffy looked up wide-eyed and gape-mouthed
“I believe I’ll be calling him Rocket”
Tears now stood in the little pegasus’ eyes
“You’re so welcome, my good little boy.”
The man and fluffy share a long hug that nearly brings Harriet to tears
“Seeing a person with their happy fluffy never fails to warm my heart. I’m so glad you decided to bring him here! Let’s get the dull stuff done so little Rocket can go and meet the rest of the kids.”

After a few questions Rocket’s New Daddeh handed the nice lady a couple of cards, and they were allowed to go through a big wooden door

Rocket had never seen so many happy fluffies. They seemed to be everywhere! There were stallions playing huggy-tag over here! There were mares preening and cleaning each other over there! There were itty bitty babbehs in tiny bassinets way over there! Everywhere he looked there were fluffies laughing and smiling and playing and jumping! He had never dreamed of such a wonderful sight! He could scarcely even remember his previous life. It seemed so far away now! So many forevers ago, when he would have to bite through meanie baggies to get to the trashy-nummies inside. Sticking his nose deep into cans, trying not to get cut on the sharp edges as he licked up the last remnants of their contents. Hiding under vroomy-monsters when it rained. Shivering through the cold nights.
It seemed like an awful dream that he had finally awakened from.
His new daddeh set him down inside a pen with a dozen other stallions of similar age, and they immediately crowded around to meet the newcomer.

There must be a dozen daycares like this in every city across the entire country, these days. Perpetually overworked and understaffed, and nearly always run by moon-eyed optimists. Harriet hadn’t even glanced at the ID he’d produced. It would hardly matter if she did; He had perfected his skills in forgery, and could make up these cards by the dozen, each with an AI-generated picture that looked very little like him. But nobody ever questions that. After all, people change their look on a whim, these days.
At this time there was only one other caregiver in the big room. He walked over to her.
“Pardon me, madam, but Miss Harriet said she was having some trouble with the computer system and wanted me to ask you to come and see if you could help.”
The caregiver was clearly confused, but nodded
“Oh…uh…okay then.” She laid a tiny babbeh back in it’s bed, taking a quick glance over the fluffies to make sure there was no immediate trouble, before heading out the door, to the reception office.
Once the heavy door had closed he returned to the pen where Rocket and his new friends were hugging and cooing their greetings


“Oh Rocket, how could you? This is just awful!”
Rocket wheeled around in confusion, looking down to make sure he hadn’t accidentally made poopies or peepees.
“W-wuh am wong?” his voice trembled
“Oh No! OH NO! You’ve all done it! You’ve all done it! ALL of you fluffies!!”
Each of the stallions looked up at the man, before looking around at each other, trying to understand what they had done wrong.
“Each and Every One of You fluffies…”
Every pair of eyes in the room turned toward the man, as though he were a ringmaster in a circus. Even the little babbehs stood up and looked out of their baskets.
"you have all…forgottenHOW TO BREATHE!!

As the last echoes of his voice faded, tiny gasps and whimpers arose from every corner of the room. Previously red fluffies began turning blue. Previously blue fluffies began turning purple. Some of the fluffies had been mid-exhale, and simply deflated. Others had been mid inhale, and they never stopped. Their little lungs filled and filled and filled, their tummies distended, and ruptured.
Rocket looked up at his new daddeh in horror, his little body trembling, and spittle dripping from his mouth as his world went dark and he fell over.

The man doffed his cap, took a bow to the fluffies keeling over all around him, and strode out the door.
“Oh, Mr. Smith! There seems to be something wrong with your credit card.”
he walked straight past the reception desk and out the front door
“Mr…MR. SMITH!” Harriet shouted confusedly

"Thank you for tuning in to News Channel 11 and here are today’s headlines. Tragedy struck at a local fluffy daycare when a strange man seemingly hypnotized all of the fluffies into drowning. Local police say that this is just one of a dozen such incidents that have occurred across the state over the last month. Investigators are unable to assign a motive to these attacks, but they insist they are closing in on the culprit. "



" ‘Ou am nao bweathin’ manuawwy."




That is genius, I love the idea.


Monk Gyatso killed a bunch of firebenders is much the same way probably.


“Investigators are unable to assign a motive to these attacks, but they agree this shit is genius”.


Holy shit that’s amazing :joy:
It’s genius, hilarious and deadly. I love your stories so much

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No crime has been committed, coppers. The bandit remains free.

Impersonation with intent to defraud.

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I’m not sure it counts as impersonating someone when it’s an alias you invented out of whole cloth

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Like what’s the difference between me being Rusty Shackleford and me TELLING people my name is Rusty Shackleford?

Agreed. The guy is being smart by going after a “low priority” victim group I think. Well, until he kills some rich person’s mother’s favorite fluffy.


This is the quintessential fluffy story :joy: hugbox, abuse, rescued street fluffs, disdain and love for fluffies, moronbox. This story is the pure distilled fluffy experience

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I’m gonna take that as a huge compliment, Thank You Coraline! :martinidrink:

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