Your fluffy, Clarence, had been VERY VERY VERY VERY bad.
The Blue earthie with a yellow mane and hair was normally a well behaved fluff ever since you got him about a month ago, he’d had tantrums of course, but nothing too major. Not yesterday however. Yesterday you had taken him to your friend Tom’s Fluffy’s birthday party. Yeah it’s weird but whatever, Tom is fucking hot and you wanna get closer to him, so going to his fluffy Cyan’s birthday was a good step in that direction.
On the way there, you kept reminding Clarence to be on his very best behavior. “So dude, remember. None of the presents will be for you, they’re ONLY for Cyan, got it? I don’t want you getting jealous and throwing a tantrum because Cyan gets gifts and you don’t, understand?”
Clarence looked up at you with his big dumb eyes and nodded. “Yus daddeh! Cwawence undastansies! Be gud fwuffy fo fwiend Cyan’s pawty!” He was wriggling in excitement. It was his first ever time at a birthday party and he couldn’t wait to play with his friends. “Gon gib dem huggsies and den wun an pway wit Cyan!”
You smiled at the stupid little thing. “That’s a good fluffy. I knew I could count on you!”
Spoiler alert: You Fucking Couldn’t. When in doubt, NEVER trust a fluffy to not be stupid.
The party started off well enough. Tom greeted you with a big hug, giving you a chance to feel his thick pecs press up against you. Kick ass.
Clarence and Cyan and the other fluffies there played nicely. Running, playing with balls, babbling about sketti. Normal retarded fluffy shit. Tom put on some fluff tv and they all started dancing which was adorable. You know, you still had issues with fluffies, but they were honestly kinda fun. It was like having a kid but a hell of a lot cheaper and less of a time sink. Once you fluffy proofed a safe room and gave them enough toys, you could leave them in there for hours and hours. That’s what you did with Clarence atleast and he turned out fine.
Well, so you thought.
“Okay, time for cake!” Tom shouted. All the guests and their fluffies gathered around him, the fluffies all in awe at the cake that was in the shape of a huge pile of spaghetti and meatballs. It looked very expensive.
“Oooooh, SKETTIS SKETTIS SKETTIS!” Clarence jumped up and down in excitement, slightly bumping into the other fluffies there, including Cyan. “CWAWENCE WAN SKETTIS!” You could tell the other owners there were staring at you due to your fluffy’s loudness.
Tom chuckled and smiled. “Oh, you’ll get some of this, but after we open Cyan’s gifts.” He then began to place said gifts down in front on Cyan, a female unicorn who’s color was her name. It was only three small wrapped presents, but you get that to a fluffy it looked with a king’s random.
“Tank yuu daddeh! Cyan wub pwessies! Yuu bestest daddeh eba!” Shen then began to clumsily tear the wrapping off with her teeth. The other fluffies, Clarence included, ooh’d and ahh’d at her gifts, a new ball, a new stuffy friend, and a tiny little sun hat for her to wear on very hot days.
Looking at Tom, you commented on the hat. “Huh, never knew they made hats for fluffies.”
“Heh, they make ANYTHING for fluffies.” He answered, smiling cutely. God, he was handsome….
Then it happened. Clarence’s true nature surfaced for the first time.
“Fwiend Cyan, kin Cwawence pway wit yuu pwessies pwease? Dey wook su much funsies.” The blue fluffy questioned Cyan.
Frowning, Cyan shyly replied. “Weww….Cyan jus open pwessies, nu pway wit dem yet. Cwawence kin pway wit dem sum odds time afta Cyan pway sum mowe.” She then gave him a friendly lick on the cheek. Awwww.
Clarence responded by brattily puffing out his big blue cheeks and stomping his hoof as hard as he could. “Nu faiw! Dummeh fwuffy Cyan gib Cwawence toysies nao! Cwawence wan! Cwawence wan!!!”
Oh god. Here we go. He was literally doing EVERYTHING you told him not to do. You attempted to get between the two an an attempt to stop the incoming tantrum, but there were so many fluffies on the floor that you risked stepping on one and hurting it.
“Clarence, stop that. You’re being bratty. You don’t wanna be a bratty fluffy, right?” You tried to reason with him. “Look, you’re upsetting your friend Cyan.”
“CWAWENCE NU BWATTY, CWAWENCE A GUD FWUFFY AN GUD FWUFFIES NEE NYU TOYSIES MOWE DEN DUMMEH CYAN!! NU FAIW NU FAIW NU FAIW!” The blue brat began to buck and kick and roll around, screaming and shouting as the tantrum began. All the other fluffies were looking at him with expressions of annoyance and disgust. Nobody liked a tantrum thrower.
Tom approached your fluffy. “Now, Clarence. That’s not very good behavior for a goo-“
He was silenced by a thick stream of sorry poopies.
“TAEK SOWWY POOPIES AWW YUU DUMMEHS, DIS CWAWENCE PAWTY NAO!!!” Spinning in a circle, your horrible fluffy coated practically EVERYTHING in the room with shit. The guests, Tom, you, the fluffies, the gifts, and the very expensive cake. “POOPIE ATTACKKKKKK!”
You had tried to grab him to prevent more shit flinging, only to get a ton of your fluffy’s excrement all over your glasses, blinding you while you still heard his screams. “CWAWENCE TUFFIE SMAWTY, GIB YUU AWW SOWWY POOPIES HEHEHEHEH!!”
“HUU HUU HUUUUU, WHA FWIEND CWAWENCE BE A MEANIE FWUFFY?!!!” Cyan cries. The other fluffies are all crying too, their owners trying to comfort them as they panicked and waddled around.
“Nuuuuu, poopie fwuffy gib sowwy poopies!!”
“Nu smeww pwetty!”
“Huu huu huu, nu wan num poopies anymowe….”
Finally, you managed to wipe the shit off your glasses and get ahold of the little bastard. Infuriatingly, Clarence seemed to have no idea that he had done anything wrong.
“Wha daddeh gwab Cwawence’s fwuffy su hawd?! Nu do nuttin wong!! Am bein smawty!”
“Wrong answer, you blue fuck. You just did EVERYTHING wrong!!!” You kept flicking his nose with your finger until it bled, making the fucker scream and cry, thankfully not shit though, asshole used up his supply during his tantrum.
You…….had to cough up a good chunk of change to replace the cake that Tom had bought. Also needless to say you had to leave the party.
The ride home was a nightmare. All Clarence did was cry and scream and bitch and moan about how “Daddeh bein meanie munsta daddeh! Gu bak tu smawty Cwawence’s pawty NAO!”
“Listen here you son of a bitch. You are NOT a smarty. I dunno where you heard that from or where you got it, but it stops NOW. Do you know what you did? Not only did you ruin Cyan’s party, but you ruined my chance with Tom!” You flicked his nose again, causing him to fart in fear. “You are SO fucked when we get home.”
Clarence gulped in fear.
Which brings you to the present. Clarence is locked in his safe room. You removed everything but the litterbox in there as a punishment. You can hear him sobbing loudly and pawing at the door in anguish.
You decided to go online to figure out what went wrong. Clarence had never interacted with smarties before, or seen footage of them on fluff tv, so you had no idea where this behavior had come from. After doing some research however, you found out that on very very very VERY rare occasions……good fluffies can just randomly turn into smarties.
Jesus fucking christ Hasbio.
So you had a few options. One was to just kill Clarence. Once a smarty always a smarty, websites would say. But you don’t really wanna do that. Despite everything that he’d done, you still cared for the little asshole and had nice memories of him.
That brought you to your second option. Rehabilitation. This would be much tougher, smarty friends were insanely stubborn. But you couldn’t give up on Clarence.
For hours you pondered, trying to think of a way to change his behavior! Then it hit you. YOU wouldn’t be able to change his behavior……but maybe the God of Sketti could!
You used to do theater in high school so this would be a breeze.
……………
The next day you unlocked the door of Clarence’s empty saferoom and walked in. It was a mess. Shit and piss stains were everywhere and Clarence himself looked like a wreck as he woke up. He had most likely been sobbing and throwing a tantrum all night.
“Daddeh!” He cheerfully dashed towards you, eager for hugs, kisses, and sketti. “Daddeh’s back fo Cwawence!! Cwawence miss yuu daddeh! Kin Smawty Cwawence hab huggies an skettis an pway?” The blue puffball bounced around your feet.
Well, the good news was that he hadn’t gone FULL smarty yet. He still seemed to love you and wasn’t demanding things like a brat. Perhaps the party had been a momentary break in his shitty programming? Either way, it wasn’t too late to save him, but it was going to require some tough love.
“Clarence……no. You were very very bad yesterday. You ruined Cyan’s party and embarrassed daddy. You don’t deserve those things until you start being a good fluffy again.” You said softly but sternly.
Clarence looked shocked at being told no yet again. That shock soon turned to rage. “Buh buh buh, CWAWENCE AM GUD FWUFFY! AM BESTEST FWUFFY! AM AM AM AM SMAWTY!” He began to buck and kick your feet while you rolled your eyes and sighed.
“Clarence……I’m just trying to explain to you tha-”
“NU SPWAIN DUMMEH DADDEH! GIB SKETTIS TU SMAWTY! NAO NAO NAO NAO NAO!”
With a shrug you ignored him and exited the safe room, leaving the brat to stew in his own uselessness.
Half an hour later you reentered the room, holding a big plate of sketti……and also wearing a cheap rubber Godzilla mask that you had bought last halloween.
“CLARENCE.” You bellowed, making the blue brat jump out of his skin.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH, MUNSTA! PWEASE NU HUWT CWAWENCE BIG WIZAWD MUNSTA! CWAWENCE GUD FLUFFY HUU HUU HUU HUUUUUUU!” He pathetically hid his face under his hooves, hoping that because he couldn’t see you, you couldn’t see him.
Even for a fluffy, Clarence was pretty dumb.
“CLARENCE. I AM NOT HERE TO HURT YOU. I AM THE GOD OF SKETTI, SKETTIZILLA. I GIVE SKETTI TO GOOD FLUFFIES AND MAKE BAD FLUFFIES NOT ABLE TO TASTE SKETTI. I HEARD FROM YOUR DADDEH THAT YESTERDAY YOU WERE A BAAAAAAAAD FLUFFY. THE WORST FLUFFY. YOU MUST ATONE FOR YOUR SINS AND PAY THE PRICE.”
You then set down the plate of sketti on the ground. Almost instantly, Clarence’s fear disappeared and he waddled over to the sketti, greedily gobbling it up. “Tank yu nice munsta! Dis gud sketti fo bestest smawty Cwawence!”
The moment you said these words, you scooped up the sketti, leaving the fluffy huffing in anger.
“Dummeh munsta taek sketti away? NU, BIG SKETTI BAKSIES!”
“WRONG. YOU ARE BEING BOSSY AND GREEDY AND CALLING YOURSELF A SMARTY AND A BESTEST. GOOD FLUFFIES DO NOT CALL THEMSELVES SUCH THINGS. I SHALL NOW TAKE YOUR ABILITY TO TASTE SKETTI AWAY. BEHOLD.” You then quickly switched the real sketti with some fake toy spaghetti that you hid around the door, placing it in front of him.
“Gud, dummeh munsta gib sketti bak tu Cwawence ow get foweba sweepies.” The bully grumbled before trying to bite into the sketti……and finding that it had no taste, nor could he even eat it. “Huh….wha……wha wong? Wha taste peace nu num sketti? Wha goin on???” His eyes began to dart around the room in a panic.
“YOU ARE WHAT IS WRONG. YOU HAVE BEEN BAD, SO YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO EAT SKETTI AGAIN…….EVER.”
“NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!” Clarence screamed the loudest you swore a fluffy could scream. He screamed so loud and so long that you worried that he was going to blow out his voicebox until eventually he tired out and curled up in the middle of the floor ij a ball, softly crying. “Huuu huu huuu……dis mean Cwawence am bad fwuffy……am wowstest fwuffy……nu kin eba num skettis agin……huu huu huuuu.”
Now was your chance.
“CLARENCE. I WILL GIVE YOU ONE MORE CHANCE. BUT YOU MUST PROMISE TO NEVER ACT LIKE A SMARTY EVER AGAIN. SMARTIES NEVER EAT SKETTI BECAUSE ALL SMARTIES ARE BAD. THIS IS A TRUE FACT, AS I AM THE GOD OF SKETTI AND I KNOW ALL. I WILL RETURN YOUR ABILITY TO EAT SKETTI, BUT YOUR DADDEH CAN CALL ME AT ANY TIME TO TAKE THAT ABILITY AWAY IF HE THINKS YOU’RE ACTING LIKE A SMARTY. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?”
Clarence practically launched himself at your feet, hugging and kissing them as he begged and pleaded. “Yus Skettiziwwa! Cwawence wiww be a gud fwuffy nao! Neba eba act wike a smawty eba agin, pwomise! Pwease nu taek skettis away foweba!”
You nodded and switched the real sketti back, letting him eat it happily while you stepped outside for a costume change.
“Hey Clarence, did my friend Skettizilla talk some sense into you?” You raised an eyebrow, praying that your lesson sunk in.
Stopping his gorging, he ran up to you, pawing and hugging you leg. “Yus! Am so sowwy daddeh! Wuz a bad fwuffy, da wowst fwuffy! Nu wanna be a smawty eba agin, smawties am dummies who nu get sketti!”
Reaching down, you proudly patted his head. “Well that’s good. But remember, I can call him back at ANY time if I think you’re being really really bad, understand?” He nodded grimly, his eyes full of fear.
From that day on, Clarence was a good fluffy……well, as good as any fluffy could be. He was still a dumbass, but atleast he was a sweet dumbass and not a fucking smarty. You eventually met up with Tom and Cyan again and heavily apologized to them. Shockingly, they forgave you, especially once you told him about what happened with Clarence.
Now, Cyan and Clarence are the bestest of friends once more while you and Tom are currently going steady.
But whenever you noticed that Clarence was beginning to act up, all you had to do was remind him of Skettizilla……