Do y’all smell bacon?
You follow the herd for a while. The sun starts to set. You text Sandra and ask if she can feed frosting and the others tonight. It’s times like this you’re glad you gave her your spare house key. You’re still on your property but this is a part you haven’t really explored since you were a kid. Your granddad used to hunt deer on this part of the farm. Given the lack of traffic through this area it’s no wonder this is where the herd set up shop.
This thing sucks to lug around. Three gallons of gasoline may not seem like much but after a while it grates on your arms. Not that you plan on having any of it on the trek back home.
Finally the herd emerges into a clearing leading to a rocky cliff. There’s just enough of an indent in the sandstone to consider the Fluffies nest a shallow cave… What you see shakes you up a bit.
By what’s obviously the smarties bed is what looks to be tiny colorful potatoes… In other words unmoving, unbreathing foals. Suddenly a larger orange foal perks up.
“YAY DADDEH BACKSIES! WUB DADDEH!”
It says running towards the smarty.
You stay in the treeline watching the scene unfold.
“Did bestest babbeh howd down da fowt?”
The smarty asks.
“Bestest babbeh did Daddeh! Do wah Daddeh say!.. Weww… Dummeh nyu babbeh twy an sneakies away buh bestest babbeh catch an gib sowwy hoofsies!”
He says raising his front legs in the air.
“Teehee. Dummeh babbeh. Nu gud babbeh wike bestest smawty babbeh. Daddeh get wots ob Nummies.”
The foals eyes get big looking at the bag of expired sweets.
“Babbeh wub sweety Nummies!”
You watch as the smarty takes out what must be today’s ration out of the bag.
The smarty and the foal eat their share. Then the toughies. Then finally the mares. As all that was left for them are crumbs. The mares start weakly pushing each other away trying to lick up what remains over the processed junk food.
The smarty watched carefully which got the most. Within an hour her crotchtits started to swell.
“Awite bestest babbeh. Dat one has ou miwkies.”
The smarty says to it’s spawn. The foal that you just watched gulf down an old donut half it’s size runs excitedly towards the gaunt mare.
“DUMMEH BABBEH! DAT AM BESTEST BABBEHS MIWKIES!”
He says tearing the skeletal chirpy foal off of what must have been it’s first meal in days.
“Huuhuu. Pwease babbeh. Pwease weab udda babbehs sum miwkies dis tim?”
The mare asks only to be interrupted by the smarty.
“Dummeh mawe nu teww bestest babbeh wah do! Babbeh dwinkies as many miwkies as babbeh wan!”
She starts to open her mouth in protest but stops herself. It’s obvious this happens a lot.
You watch as the foal greedily suckles from not just one but both tits. Kicking any of the other foals away if they dare try to join.
At this point dark sets in. The fat foal’s suckles are loud. Loud enough that you draw no attention as you click the safety on your rifle off.
They may not be able to see you. But you certainly see them.
You take aim at the foal… BANG
Without even having enough time to yell “HUWTIES” a 5.56 x 45 sized hunk of lead pierces straight though the foals stomach like butter. It was almost cartoonish seeing what must have been a mixture of blood, milk, and half digested donut spew out of the holes.
Though at the noise you could hear the pbrbrbrt of scaredy poopies It took a second before any of the Fluffies processed what just happened.
“Babbeh?.. BABBEH!”
The smarty yells as it runs towards the popped boil that was once his sunshine.
“Huuhuuhuu NUUU! BABBEH! Daddeh am hewe! G-GIB HUGGIES!?! MAKE BETTEW!?!”
He says frantically Hugging the expired infant.
He’s the only one who wasn’t staring up at you in horror as you walked out of the tree line.
“Hello fuckers!”
You say as you light the end of your flamethrower.
“You’re all gonna burn.”
With that you let out the first burst. The flames hit the orange toughie that was complaining about not being able to rape the baby earlier. His fluff caught like a match.
“SCREEEEEEEEEEEEHEEEHEEEHEEEEE!!! BUWNIES! BUWNIIIIEEEEEEEEES! HOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOTHOOOOOOOOOT!”
He screamed while frantically running in circles unsure what to do. Within seconds the fire took the wind out of him. The other Fluffies watch as their hairless friend’s skin and fat melts leaving only charred blackened muscle… Then it starts.
“MUNSTAAAAAAAH!!!”
One shrieks as they all try to get away. Any reasonable animal would have picked a direction and ran. But thankfully Fluffies are stupid. Two Toughies rush at you in a dumb attempt to try and fight you off.
You ignite one.
“HAAWT! HAAHAAHAAHAAWT! HUUHUU NEE HUGGIES!”
He says immediately turning around. He runs up to what must be his sex slave. Oh sorry. “Speciaw fwen”.
“NUU! STAY WAY!”
She screams. Alas. She was malnourished and couldn’t get away from the now running for his life toughie.
He grabs her in a death grip.
“SCREEEE BUWNIES! WOWSTEST BUWNIES!”
She tries blowing on the Toughie. Poor Fluffies. She didn’t realize that blowing air on a roaring flame just makes it stronger.
In one final desperate act of love for her brood she threw her foals as far away as she could to let them avoid her gruesome fate.
You take note of that to check later. The other toughie manages to reach your leg where he attempts to give you sorry hoofsies.
In one fluid motion you draw back your leg and send him soaring with a kick. He hits head first against a rock wall. You hear a sickening crack up on impact and he lays still.
You look and see another fluffy take off into the. Treeline.
Not wanting to cause a forest fire you take aim and shoot.
“BANG SCREEEEEEE!”
Right in the asshole. He drops on the spot as blood gushes out of his anus.
The last toughie was definitely the smartest of the little herd. Though that’s not saying much. Honestly you might have missed him. But he made one fatal mistake.
" Enfenfenfenf GUUUUUD FEEEEWS!!!"
Okay I said smartest of the bunch I didn’t say smart in general. You look over towards the noise and see the toughie fucking one of the skinny mares. He has her pinned.
“Dummeh mawe nu wun way! Gu sab hewd fwum munstah!”
The way she looked at me said it all.
She closed her eyes and put her head down.
You send a stream of flames towards the two.
“SCREEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeee------”
The flames went straight into his mouth destroying his vocal chords. The only way I can describe it is ripping a cassette tape out of the player mid song.
The mare didn’t even scream. You really don’t wanna know what the poor bitches have been through to accept death by fire like that.
Only one left.
You look towards the smarty and see despite the chaos he’s still sitting on his haunches trying desperately to hug his popped foal back to life.
He’s covered from the waist down in thick bloody milk. And shit.
“Babbeh nu! Am wastes babbeh! Nu go fowevew sweepies!”
It pleads.
“Dumbass. It’s already dead. Just like your group of shitrats.”
You say.
He finally looks away from his deceased child and looks up at you.
“BUUHUUHUU! Why munstah gib wowstest owies ta hewd!?! Why gib bestest an wastes babbeh fowevew sweepies!?! Am gud fwuffy!”
He pleads.
“Yeah yeah boohoo and all that. Good Fluffies don’t rape babies. Now the real question. How to make you hurt.”
You say trying to sound menacing.
“NUUU! NUU GIB HUWTIES!! DUMMEH. MUNSTAH DESEWB HUWTIES!!!”
He says. His voice cracking letting his fear shine through.
“Ya know… I hate pedos. The only thing protecting them from people like me are human laws. You on the other hand have no such luxury. I’m going to enjoy this.”
You say sitting your rifle down carefully.
You turn quickly and grab the smarty by the nap of his neck. Not giving him time to get away.
“NUUUHUUHUUHUUU BAD UPSIES!!!”
It screams sending loose a stream of liquid shit.
You pick up the foal that you thought was dead. Squeezing it you can faintly feel a tiny heart still beating, and tiny shallow breathing… You hope he’s still conscious enough to feel this.
“Huh… Tough little thing huh? Looks like your gremlin is still alive shitrat.”
He looks up at me.
“GASP WEAWY! HUUHUU SUUU HAPPY!”
Not for long fucker.
Holding him in this position has a side effect. His shitty little red rocket hangs down.
“Ya like fuckin foals do ya? Well HOW ABOUT THIS YOU FUCK!”
With force you slam the foal down on its cock. Not ass first. Oh hell no. He’s gonna fuck it to death through the bullet hole.
The minute his dick pierces the wound the foal let’s out a sloshy gurgle.
“NU! NUUUU! DAT WASTEST BABBEH!!! NU FOH ENFIES!”
Smarty screams.
You leave the little fucker there. But ya gotta make sure he doesn’t slide off.
You pluck a 5.56x45 bullet from one of your extra magazines.
“This oughta make a bulge.”
You say before roughly jamming the rifle round as deep into the smarties urethra as it can go.
“SCREEEEE!!! WOWSTEST NUNU STICK HUUHUUHUUWTIES!!!”
He shrieks. Blood trickles around the now plugged hole. The smarty stares at it’s ruined cock, and his now deceased hopes and dreams impaled on it.
Dreams of his precious little baby taking his place. Dashed. Just as he dashed so many others.
"… Wan die. … Wa…n… die… "
Whelp you know what that means. Fun’s over. But first.
You drop the smarty who doesn’t even try to get away.
You grab his back legs.
SNAP CRACK
You break them both.
“Wan diIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE!!!”
Apparently he wasn’t completely broken yet.
“Wish not granted asshole.”
With the limp pieces of flesh and broken bone you tie his back legs together in a bloody knot. Bones piercing through his surprisingly elastic skin at all angles.
He’s not even saying wan die anymore. He’s crying softly with his eyes dead and wide. It’s a little creepy if you’re being honest with yourself.
You hang him from a low tree limb by his tied together destroyed legs. Like a living coat hanger.
You leave him there to slowly expire.
Your focus now is on the foals.
You walk over to the smarties nest and just as you feared. The stack of foals were all dead … Except one.
With weak and fearful chirps you see a small yellow foal. The same one that you gave the bottle too that caused this whole ordeal.
Upon inspection you realize it’s been through hell.
It’s asshole was prolapsed. You shouldn’t be surprised but you still wish you were wrong.
The starving mares that lived, Along with their foals were long gone by this point. Honestly wherever they end up they’re better off.
You don’t see the foal’s father anywhere so you assume the worst for him.
You walk over to where you saw the burning mare throw her foals.
There were four.
One wasn’t so lucky it landed back first on an exposed Rock edge. You can tell by the way it flops it’s back is broke.
You pick it up and snap it’s neck. Making it silent and ending the poor things suffering. The other two seem fairly okay. A little scuffed and bruised but they lay together in a tiny fluffpile holding each other.
The fourth… Well … Looking at the little thing you think it hit its head. Its eyes were looking in opposite directions and unlike it’s brethren it’s speech was off. But other than that it looked to be physically fine.
“HUUHUUU! Mummah! Mummah! Why gib babbeh huwties!?! Am gud babbehs!” One of the two okay foals cries.
“Ih gud bwuddew! Babbesh gib guddy huggseez!”
The one with head trauma says.
You gather them all up along with your rifle and head home.
~Two days later~
Luckily Sandy was still at the house when you got there last night. You had her look completely over the foals.
She thinks the prolapsed one will recover but he’ll have to wear a foal diaper for the rest of his life as it’s obvious he can’t control his bowels.
The okay two are already back to normal. After being fed and adopted by Rassberry they’re already playing with the other foals. Probably the most energy they’ve had since they were born.
She told me the weird one had a condition fluffy vets call being “derped”. Not the name I’d pick for it but it works. She said I may have a hard time finding that one a home. I asked her if she would take him but apparently the law says any defective fluffy must be euthanized immediately at any licenced shelter. She told me to keep it away from the other foals as derped Fluffies are prime targets for bullying so for now it’s being looked after by frosting and Blackberry.
Just another Tuesday in paradise I gue- knock thump knock
Sigh
You answer the door. There stands a blue stallion and his special friend.
“Pwease nice mistah. Gib nu-BANG”
You load another shell.
BANG
You toss their corpses in the trash. You need to learn to lock the fuckin gate.
Derp-strength concerns me, blackberry if he so much as breaths in frostings direction i want you to eat him like hes a birthday cake!