Stuck In The Middle With You, by Swindle

Your name is Wesley. You’re an asshole. You’re also bored.

Hmmm, what do you have laying around that you can… bingo.

Grabbing your supplies, you walk outside and begin looking around the alley behind your apartment building, starting with the dumpster.

Ah ha! You spot a fluffy mare asleep behind a bunch of cardboard boxes, two little foals on her back. You reach down, careful not to disturb any of them, and squeeze out a bead of super glue onto the muzzles of both foals.

One foal doesn’t stir and the glue soaks into its fluff around its mouth; the fumes will probably drug it enough to keep it unconscious, and now it’s mouth is glued shut, preventing it from nursing from its mother and condemning it to a slow death from thirst and starvation.

It’s sibling may end up luckier; your glue also got on its nose and as you watch, the little foal’s eyes shoot open and it starts thrashing around, pawing at its face with its hooves, clearly unable to breath. In only seconds, it collapses, its eyes rolling back, and lays motionless; you’re not sure if it actually suffocated that quickly, or if it passed out from inhaling the glue. Either way, it’s dead, and its brief struggle didn’t wake its sibling or its mother.

You sneak off down the alley, peering behind various debris until you spot another fluffy; this time you find a full-grown stallion, laying on its back and muttering to itself in its sleep. You lean over and place a drop of super glue on the tip of its dick and sneak off, giggling. Then you pause, go back, and apply super glue to its anus and run off giggling even more hysterically.

Hmmm, what to do next? Ah, perfect! You spot another mare giving a tongue bath to one of its foals, two more nursing at her crotch boobs and a fourth laying on its back cheeping loudly. You pull out a strip of double-sided carpet tape and peel the protective layer off one side and approach the mare.

The mare, oblivious, continues bathing her chirping spawn and has no idea you’re there until you reach out and slap the carpet tape onto her back.


You hold her down with one hand and yank the protective lay off the other side of the carpet tape, then run off down the alley laughing like Mark Hamil impersonating the Joker have an orgasm while thousands of die all around him.

The mare, scared by the sudden assault on her and your maniacal laughter, hurriedly puts all her babies on her back- right on top of the carpet tape- and waddles off behind a mail box in what is probably the worst attempt at hiding that you’ve ever seen.

“Otay babbehs, mummah safe yoo fwum bad hoomin! Huh? Babbehs? Why nu cum off mummah’s back?”

Then the mare tries to remove her foals from her back by reaching with one hoof… which promptly gets stuck to the carpet tape. You literally fall over laughing as she spins in circles trying to free her hoof and falls on her face repeatedly. Her foals are all chirping in a panic, completely immobilized by the tape that has them permanently attached to their mother’s back.

In the next alley over, you come across a pair of stallions, both calling themselves smarty, fighting over a mare. Both have raging bones. You run up and before either one can react, you grab one and flip him on his back and jam a Chinese finger trap on his dick. Then you grab the second one and, with a little trickier maneuvering this time, get the other one’s dick stuck in the trap.

Now both fluffies are balanced on their hind legs, batting at each other with their front legs, and trying to pull away from each other.



The mare, wisely, has decided to haul ass awy from whatever the hell you’re doing, but her fast waddle really can’t compete with your slow jog and you grab her by the scruff of the neck. Let’s see…

You have to check two more alleys before you find a stallion, carrying a struggling, crying mare with you the entire time.

“Hey fluffy! You see this pretty mare? Guess what? She wants you to give her special huggies!”


“Yeah! Go for it!”

You jam the tube of super glue in the mare’s cooch and give it a squirt, then set her down in front of the stallin, who immediately mounts her.

“Enf enf enf!”


“Enf enf- nu am dummeh! Enf enf enf!”

The stallion actually finishes before he realizes anything is wrong, and when he can’t pull out he panics.


The mare, naturally, also panics at what appears to be the stallion’s best attempt to pull her vagina inside out and shits all over his crotch, then runs off down the sidewalk crying while the stallion totters along on his hind legs trying to keep up so he doesn’t rip his dick off.

You laugh so hard it hurts and you see tears in your eyes, then you glance at your watch and sadly realize that thirty minutes have passed. Damn.

Time flies when you’re being an asshole.


Mark Hamil would do it, too. The man gives no fucks.


Must be an Anthro missing link to be able to reach her back with a hoof.

Also, fresh Domestics to all be so oblivious that a human can sneak up quickly while giggling to every single one.

Also, cyanoacrylate burns like a motherfucker on sensitive places. No way that isn’t waking them up unless they were already dying or something.

This town must have some seriously fucked up Fluffies. I’m kinda picturing it being like near a superfund site, where everything is a little messed up. Including the humans. Like the first level of Sanitarium, you get a face reveal as he looks at his watch and he has a stretched face and two pupils in one eye or something.