STAY TUNED FOR A VERY IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT AFTER THIS INTERNET-BREAKING FINALE!
As the shot rang out, you collapsed into the snow, a pool of blood forming around you.
Dweam nebah feew weal wub, you thought. Untiw nao.
Your poopie babbeh stood over you, holding the smoking rifle you’d given him for Christmas. As you died, you thought you could see your yellow sister, holding your hoof as you took your last breaths.
“’uo did gud.” Were your last words before you went foweba sweepies. You’d known this was the only way, your boy was going down a path you didn’t want. And the only chance he had at a normal, mentally stable, life was to shoot his own father in the snow. As everyone knows murdering your parent solves all your mental problems.
Poopie looked behind him, Smarty had arrived.
“How ‘uo find Poopie an’ Smawty?” He asked.
“Smawty googwe Dweam an’ Poopie wowcation.”
“O dah mak’ sense.”
Smarty looked looked down at Dream’s lifeless corpse in the snow before stepping to Poopie.
“Hewe am nummies,” Smarty handed him two pretzels and a fruit rollup. “Go into fowest, tak’ paf to woad an’ fowwow it. Nebah come back hewe.”
As poopie left, smarty grabbed a nearby rag with his mouth, wiping poopie’s hoofprints from the rifle.
“HEWD! DWEAM AM FOWEBA SWEEPIES! DEWE WAS SMARTY-INBOLBED BOOMIE-TANG!”
As smarty yelled out for the herd, Poopie began his long journey somewhere else. He reached to his back and pulled out a letter, one his daddeh had written all those years ago.
Dweam’s deawest Spawky,
Dis am hawdest wettaw Dweam wiww ebah wite. Ou may hab seen Dweam’s namie among da foweba sweepies ob Huwwicane Sweetie an Dweam bewibe dat am fo da best.
Dweam gib anyting to see Spawky an Poopie Babbeh ‘gain. To see Poopie smiwe. To howd him. Dweam cewebrate Poopie’s birfday in Dweam’s heawt. Poopie is an’ aways wiww be Dweam’s fantom wimb.
Dweam wan wat ebery daddeh wan: fo babbeh to be happeh. To wib an wub wifout scawdies. To shawe gifts wif da wowd. Buh we bof know wit Dweam awound a nowmal wife fo’ Poopie won’ be possibwe.
Dis am not an easy choice. Sometimes Dweam wish da Huwwicane had taken Dweam. Reweased Dweam fwom da buwden ob Dweam’s own uwges. Instead, it showed Dweam dat I hab to beaw dem awone. Dat am Dweam’s fate.
So, unwess Poopie Babbeh stawts sowing any dawk tendencies Dweam beh ‘uo. Wet Dweam go foweba sweepies, so babbeh can wib.
Poopie took the trail to the road, and began to follow as a line of fluffies came by the other way. Hulk, Lollipop, and a bunch of other reunions that would’ve been cool to see.
WE HOPE THIS EPIC FINALE BROKE THE INTERENT! NOW WE WOULD LIKE TO ANNOUNCE THE AMERICAN DREAM BLUE-RAY SET! YUP! THAT’S OUR BIG ANNOUNCEMENT WE’VE BEEN HYPING UP! GO FUCK YOURSELVES!
(Note: NONE OF THIS IS CANON AND THIS IS NOT THE FINALE. I just needed to vent after that god awful Dexter finale. The real Part 39 will come soon.)