A blind man was begging on the street.
“Cure for blindness? Got a cure for blindness? I can’t see and need a blindness cure!”
None of the people on the street stopped because they wanted to keep their cures for blindness to themselves and correctly had a deep-seated hatred of the homeless.
“How about money? Give me your hard-earned money to keep me alive, job-havers!”
Nobody gave him any money.
The blind beggar sighed.
“Darn. Why won’t society let me parasitically leech off of it because of my disability?”
“Hewwo!”
The blind beggar didn’t look up because he was blind.
“Who is it? Do you have a cure for blindness or money? Give me your stuff!”
“Wha? Nu no wut nice mistah am tawksies about. Am fwuffy!”
Indeed it was. An orange and yellow pegasus fluffy with a green mane.
The fluffy had seen a human in distress and immediately trotted over to help.
The fluffy plopped on his ass and began shaking his front hooves back and forth.
“Wook! Am dancie fwuffy!”
The blind man did not appreciate that.
“I am blind so I can’t see your dancing. Like all disabled people I hate and envy the abled.”
The fluffy’s first idea hadn’t worked, so now he had to come up with a new one.
He began singing.
“Fwuffy wub nu-see-pwaces hoomin, nu-see-pwaces hoomin wub fwuffy-”
The blind beggar interrupted.
“I’m blind, that means I can’t understand music and singing! You are ableist!”
The fluffy was stumped. He’d tried dancing and singing, other than babbehs or sketties what else could make a sad human feel happy again?
Then he had an idea!
“Huggies make ebwyting bettew!”
He trotted over and hugged the blind man.
Like all homeless people the beggar responded to kindness by taking advantage of it.
He grabbed the fluffy and took a huge bite out of him.
“SCREEEE!!! FWUFFIES NU AM NUMMIES!”
The fluffy’s distress at being eaten was obvious, but the poor can’t afford empathy.
The blind beggar devoured the fluffy, by the time he was done only chewed bones remained.
He raised a bloody fist in triumph.
“With this meal I can keep up my selfish lifestyle for another day! I love fluffies!”
The moral of this story is that money and property are the only things that matter.
Paid for by the Committee to Elect Ricky Guerra.