Paul leaned over the counter and clicked his teeth. The food truck had just finished its lunch rush. The smell of Taco’s teased at his nose while Jose worked on the stove.
“Damn. I thought they would never end.”
Jose nodded, “Yeah. I’m beat.”
“Hewwo!” A voice called out.
Paul leaned over a counter. The biggest fluffy he had ever seen looked up at him. The fluffy was male with a beautiful aquamarine coat, Paul noticed that the fluffy mane was styled into a neat single braid. The chubby fluffy looked up at Paul.
“Can fwuffy hab two soft taco, two cwunchy taco, and two womenaids?!” The fluffy was positively brimming with excitement.
Paul looked at the jeweled collar and realized that this was a pet. “You got money, big guy?”
The fluffy nodded, “Fwuffy cowwoa have monies!”
Paul shrugged, punched in the order. The fwuffy reared up which allowed Paul to pull the retractable tag over the reader. The food was paid for and the giant fluffy stepped to the side. As the food was being processed, a gaunt white man approached the fluffy.
“In the mood for tacos?” The man chuckled.
The giant fluffy nodded, “Awex need gud nummies. Dis pwace smeww gud.”
Paul found the interaction endearing if nothing else. Once the order was done, the man picked it up. Paul couldn’t help but smile at the fellow.
“That’s the biggest fluffy I’ve ever seen. Is that some kinda designer model?”
The man nodded, “I’ve had him for a while. Gourmand is an XXL fuckffie. A custom job but only $350 for the training and genetics.”
“An XXL fluffy huh?”
“Fuckffie. The branding is god awful.” Alex snickered. “It’s a biotoy like a fluffy, but it’s made for less wholesome uses.”
“So it shits everywhere and dies in a puddle of water?” Paul shrugged as he wiped the counter and kept from staring at the fluffy-thing.
“I don’t get the whole fluffy thing. I mean they’re cute, sure, but what is the point of any biotoy?” Paul asked.
Alex tilted his head, “Well I can’t speak for everyone but I had a fluffy the exact same colors as Gourmand. Cute as a button, well behaved. He was a perfect fluffy even with the shitting and stupidity.”
“But?”
“But nothing. He grew old, said that he was sleepy and died on my lap.” Alex smiled looking at Gourmand. “I fell into a bit of a depression and a friend recommended these as a companion.”
“And?”
“And it took some getting used to the intelligence. It took far more balls feeling comfortable bringing him outside.”
“Why?”
Alex paused, “He is technically a biotoy designed for sex.”
Paul could hear his faith in humanity cracking. “Understood. Well I don’t want your food to get cold. Thanks for the info.”
Alex nodded and took his food to one of the nearby tables. Paul watched him eat with the biotoy. They laughed and joked like old friends. Once Paul was content that he wouldn’t have to call the police on a budding case of indecent exposure, he focused his attention on the other man in the truck.
“Jose, can you believe this shit. That guy over there has a giant fluffy built for fucking.”
“So?” Jose said, looking at the big fuckffie.
“So. Don’t you think it’s weird?”
Jose snorted, “My roommates have one. I don’t mind them.”
“You have a donkey sex toy in Little Mexico.” Paul slapped his coworker on the back.
Jose rolled his eyes and pulled out his phone. He dialed a number and placed the phone on the counter.
“¡Howa José! ¿Cómo es ew twabajo?”
Jose leaned over the phone, “Habla inglés. Mi amigo es un idiota que quiere hablar contigo”.
“Hewwo, Jose’s Fwiend!” A cheery voice called out.
“Hello. Are you Jose’s sex toy?” Paul snorted.
“Am enfie-mawe fo’ aww da apawtment. Am cwean-mawe, am doin’ cwothes wight nao.” A gentle thump could be heard before the sound of a dryer starting. “Name am Emiwia. Jose! Am out o’ butta!”
Paul tilted his head, he didn’t expect her to be polite. “What do you think of Jose?”
“Jose am su nice. Bwing Emiwia tacos and dwinks. Gib Emiwia tabwet tu caww aww da hoomin-stawwion!”
Paul blinked, “Well that is oddly wholesome. I think I have had enough.”
Jose hung up the phone with a pleasant goodbye. “See?”
“See what? Little Mexico has a sex donkey?” Paul shook his head. “Couldn’t be me. I can get a woman.”
“My apartment isn’t ‘Little Mexico’. You couldn’t get a woman at gunpoint and you definitely don’t have that in your life.” Jose pointed to Gourmand.
Paul watched as Alex chuckled at the Chubby fuckffie. The Stallion leaned into Alex as they ate together. Paul clicked his tongue then looked at Jose.
“Yeah. What I see is a gay dude, having lunch with his living dildo.” He turned his gaze to Jose. “I see another guy playing house with his Fleshlight.”
“Whatever.” Jose said.
Paul watched as Gourmand ate the soft tacos. The fuckffie complimented the food and genuinely didn’t do anything that Paul could complain about. He didn’t say anything as the Stallion strode back toward his counter. There was a few crumbs of soft taco shell, the aquamarine fluffy grinned up at him.
“Hewwo, nice mistah. Gouwmand notice dat nice mistah keep wookin’ at Gouwmand. Wan enfie-mawe fwiend?” Gourmand asked. “Awex said dat Gouwmand might wan gib dis.”
Gourmand reared up on his hindlegs and offered a small card. Paul plucked it from the Biotoy’s mouth and looked at the card. The black laminated card has a single picture of the Biophallus logo with a small barcode. Flipping over the card revealed a twenty five digit code, Gourmand’s name was placed under it. Jose looked over his shoulder and gave a soft whistle.
“That is a VIP discount card. Means that guy over there is someone important enough to get a personal discount from the company.” Jose said. “My roommate had one of those to get Emilia. Only paid half price.”
“Uh huh. Uh huh. Hab nice day, nice food mistahs!” Gourmand walked away with a delighted wagging of his tail.
“Paul. You’re a bitch if you don’t at least check it out.”
Paul glared at him, “I don’t wanna fuck a fluffy.”
“Then don’t. Just check it out and I bet you find one you like.”
Two Weeks Later…
Paul stepped into the Biophallus Store. The store was designed like a bar right out of a western, smooth wood floor with barrel back chairs, the staff was dressed in blue jeans with white shirts with a Biophallus logo on the back. Clashing with the cowboy aesthetic was a few bleach white podiums.
Fuckffies walked around the store, most of them dressed up as either show horses or cowboys. He noticed that they would step to other customers with laminated papers. One passed by him and he noted that the paper was a menu.
“Hello.” The man stepped up to Paul.
The man was clearly augmented, he was muscular and in the peak of human condition. His eyes were a little twitchy which spoke of a brain enhancement for reaction time. This man was either a cop or former military.
“Hey. I got one of these.” Paul offered the card.
The man looked it over and ran it over a reader that was hooked to his belt. He broke out in a smile before turning the device toward Paul.
“Mr. Alexander is a Biophallus Platinum Customer. This card is good for 90% off for your next purchase. Make sure to put everything on the same purchase. This is our highest deal.”
Paul blinked, “He didn’t seem that impressive to me, just a regular guy.”
“All of our customers are just people. So what can I interest you in.”
Paul rubbed his head, “I don’t really know. I don’t find horse shaped Biotoys hot. I wanted to see what all the hype was about.”
“Oh you are my favorite type of customer.” The man laughed in a deep baritone.
Paul was brought over to one of the white Kiosks. The man tapped a few buttons and a questionnaire appeared.
“Now you can normally just walk up to one of us and just ask for what you want. That’s fine, for those undecided we have these questionnaires. None of this is saved, there is a ten, thirty, and fifty question version.”
“Sounds like a school test. I’ll pass.”
The man’s smile didn’t even falter. He smoothly pointed to a fuckffie with blue pigtails and a cowboy hat. “That one is a basic model simply listed as sporty. A heavy drive to explore and exercise, she would do poorly with an owner that didn’t like those things.”
He pointed to another fuckffie that slept under a chair. “That one is another model listed as snuggly. Low energy love bug that is perfect for napping or watching television with. Doesn’t require much exercise.”
There was one that had solid black fur, large bat-like wings and teeth that resemble a bear trap. She turned to Paul and winked. “What is that?”
“Her model isn’t basic but of a line made for culling fluffy infestation. She is just as docile as the others but she will actively hunt fluffies. She is trained to leave domestics alone but her prey drive is high.”
“I noticed you didn’t say anything sexual about them.” Paul said.
The man nodded, “You don’t find them attractive. If you’d like me to go into detail of how modular we can make their sexual organs. I will.”
Paul shook his head, “Let’s not. What if I want a good ‘companion biotoy.’ what would you recommend?”
The man’s fingers danced over the Kiosk. He logged himself in and pulled up three models. The screen expanded on a basic looking fuckffie.
“The first one is a completely basic model. Without the discount they would be 150 but you could walk away with one for 15. They don’t have any training outside of basic math and reading. Complete blank slate with a moderate libido. Customizable modification for additional fees.”
He flicked a finger and revealed a similar looking fuckffie but with smaller teats and bushier tail.
“Our domestic model. Trained to be an exceptional companion. Trained to remember recipes and recognize style of cooking. A duty to ensure that her owner is healthy and happy. She doubles as both companion and trusted counselor. This is one of our more popular models. Normally 180 dollars out the door.”
The man flicked the screen to another fuckffie. The screen revealed a fuckffie with a stocker build and a friendly demure expression.
“This model was originally made by a customer and quickly rose to be one of our most popular. Of the three this is the lowest on the libido, it’s moderate in training. Outside of basic training there is advanced socialization and obedience training. These are $200 or twenty with your discount.”
Paul nodded as if he understood what any of this meant. Tilted his head, “I still don’t see the appeal. It’s a big fluffy.”
The man smiled, “We have one of these models in our demo room. If she doesn’t convince you then I’m sorry to have wasted your time.”
Paul was guided to a small room in the back of the store. The room resembled a rodeo with the outer area overlooking a ring of chicken wire. In the center was a small herd of fluffies, Paul wrinkled his nose at the smell of shit even though there was a staff member cleaning the pen. Watching the fluffies from outside the chicken wire was a mare XXL. Brown and white fur with a neatly cut grey mane, watched the fluffies with a wag of her fluffy tail.
“So you’re the demo sex toy?” Paul said.
“Omewette am somethin’ wike dat.” She said before turning to face Paul.
“So impress me.” Paul said.
She gave him a flat stare, “Omewette am nu magic. Nu puww wabbit out o’ hat.”
“So what can you do?” Paul asked.
“See dat?” She pointed to the mare in the center who just shat on the face of a foal she didn’t like.
“Yeah. Kinda shitty. Makes you look better by comparison.” Paul chuckled.
“Omewette nu wike dat. Omewette use bafwoom, kno’ wots o’ things, but wook wike dat.” She rolled her eyes.
She gave a laugh, “Aww da fwuffy smeww Omewette. Fwuffy kno’ dat Omewette am diffewent. Can hoomin-stawwion teww?”
What in the cinnamon toast fuck is up with this fluffy? Paul thought.
“Uh…” Paul started.
“Heheh. Am Omewette.” She offered a hoof like a handshake.
“Paul.” He leaned down to fist bump her.
“Do Mistah Pauw hab fwuffy?”
“Nah. Too needy. All I need is a shitty crying biotoy ruining my house.”
Omelette focused on the fluffies in the pen. “Dat am wite. Stinky Fwuffy dun seem fun.”
“Aren’t you supposed to convince me to buy one of you?”
Omelette looked at him then looked at her hooves. She looked around and even looked at her tail. “Omewette nu wowk hewe. Omewette towd to just be na-nowmaw.”
“Well you kinda suck.”
“Am enfie-fwiend. Dat am wat Omewette du.” She chuckled.
“Have you ever… y’know… with the staff?”
She looked at him, “Nu neba.” She nodded her head vigorously.
“Slut.”
“Ya Mummah.” She snorted.
Paul blinked, “Excuse me, Egg-girl.”
“Gonna git Mawe-fwiend dat wook wike Mummah?” She teased and tapped his leg with a hoof.
“Maybe I’ll get one that looks like you?” He shrugged.
“Pfffft. Du dat an’ name dat mawe Bacon o’ Toast.” She tilted her head.
“I’m still not convinced.” Paul shrugged.
Omelette sniffed, “Pet Omewette, pwease.”
Paul leaned down and ran his hands through her mane. His fingers parted her fur and she let out a soft sigh of contentment. He scratched under her chin and she shuddered in pleasure. His hands explored her soft fur.
“Dat am gud!” She gasped, she looked up at him. “Omewette wan mo’ but am gud mawe. Nu wan be bad. If dat aww hoomin-stawwion wan from Omewette den dat am okay.”
It clicked in Paul’s mind. These are the less embarrassing ones.
He shook his head, “You’re still a fuckffie.”
“Uh huh.” She agreed while watching the fluffies in the pen mate for the eighth time today.
“Which means you are still a sex toy.”
“So?”
“So doesn’t that mean you’re supposed to be horny?” Paul felt a little of his self confidence crack.
She motioned for him to lower his head. “Mistah. Omewette can smeww dat Mistah miwked dat meat a bit ‘fowe comin’ hewe.”
She gave a shuddering breath, “Omewette am vewy vewy into it but Omewette am gud mawe.”
Paul recoiled. He looked down at the mare that smiled at him with kind eyes. There was desire in her eyes, a need that was akin to a drug addiction. She didn’t just want his dick, she was searching for approval. His approval.
“You are a very good… sex toy?”
She let out a laugh that was soft and pleasant. She looked him up and down, “If Mistah gets an Enfie-fwiend, Omewette wanna meet ‘em.”
Paul stood up and gave the mare a pat before leaving. He made a beeline towards the salesmen. The man looked up and smiled at him.
“Did you enjoy our demo room? I do apologize about the smell, fluffies tend to stink at the best of times.”
“Alright. I’m sold. I want one like Omelette.”
“Fantastic. Want me to walk you through the custom creation process?”
The Kiosk’s screen revealed the gene-code of Omelette’s template. A Color Wheel helped him pick out common colors. He went with chestnut fur and a golden blonde mane.
The basic training and obedience training was already added. The clerk clicked a few buttons and revealed a massive list of topics and pop culture that the fuckffie could learn.
“Why is this so big?”
“Talking to a fluffy is painful. We wanted our fuckffies to be less painful. Though we still gave them fluffy mannerisms.”
“What if I don’t want them to be more experienced than I am? Just in case I wanna try something weird.” Paul whinced expecting a smart comment.
“Unless you ask for the training or get a premade model, You’ll be her or his only experience.”
Paul stopped, “This is weird. It’s like admitting my sex life is shit.”
The man shrugged, “I’ve got two. One is there to watch the house and the other is there to keep them company.”
“Have you ever fucked them?”
“Yeah. It beats my hand any day.”
“Doesn’t that feel weird? They look like fluffies. They talk like dummies.”
“I don’t get paid commission so I’m not gonna pressure you to buy. I like them. While we will never be as popular as fluffies, we have carved out our own space in the biotoy market.”
The man scratched his chin, “I’d say get her and if you are dissatisfied we will refund the price and take her as a pre built provided she isn’t bonded.”
“What’s bonding?”
“Using an injection and an hour long therapy, we make her physically dependent on your connection. You essentially give her a dopamine hit akin to a high on contact. It ensures complete obsession on the fuckffies part. Unnecessary but it is a popular tool.”
“Oooh Kay. Don’t want that.”
“What are you afraid of?”
“I’m not afraid. I’m embarrassed.”
“It’s your call. It’ll take at least two months for their training to complete once ordered.”
“Fuck it. I’m here already.”
—-Two Months Later----
Paul stepped back into the Biophallus Store with a grimace, he refused contact from the fuckffie and was now preparing to see her for the first time. The facility was just as welcoming as before, the smell was of cooked food. He noticed that many of the fluffies were eating bowls of what looked to be Texas Chili.
He stepped up to the Kiosk and pressed in his order number. It was only a few minutes before a tall female wearing a cowboy hat and a set of overalls approached with a fluffy.
“Howdy! Thank you for the purchase. This is Toast.” She said.
Toast looked up at Paul. She moved closer and sniffed him. She walked around him like a curious pet, her nose twitching. Once she was satisfied she lowered her head.
“Toast am happeh. Enfie-fwiend Paul smeww wike gud nummies!” She said.
“I recommend getting the little gal a leash and a few things from the Fluffmart. Your instruction packet comes with a few recommendations and discounts. Enjoy your new companion.”
That was it. Paul thought, I am now officially in ‘No bitches’ status.
The moment they left the shop, Toast let out a breath she was holding.
“Toast am happeh fo’ name.”
“Why?”
“Toast can say name. Nu wike Wiwy, o’ Wuke o’ Wiwwow.” She said.
“You are welcome. Another fuckffie recommended the name. So you wanna go to the Fluffmart?”
Toast eyes lit up. “Weawwy?!”
“That excited?”
“Toast onwy go fwom wab to stowe. Aww hoomin-stawwion and hoomin-mawe say dat outside am fo’ gud mawe.” She said while Paul buckled her into the backseat.
Paul got into the car and turned on the music. It wasn’t long before he arrived at the nearest Fluffmart. He let her out and stepped inside. A lanky black man sat at the register while a fuckffie sat at the next register. He noticed that the store has a black curtain in a corner.
“Hewwo Mistah. Wewcome tu Fwuffmawt!”
Toast paused, “Dat enfie-stawwion hab job!”
The stallion puffed out his chest and let his tie-like collar show, “Wucky am emp-wo-yee.”
Paul turned his attention to the man, a name tag said DeAndre. “Hey I just got my first fluffy. I have no clue what I should get her?”
DeAndre looked at the fuckffie then back to Paul. “We sell medical grade lube but I wouldn’t-”
“I mean normal stuff, like toys and shit.” Paul snapped.
“Chill. Most people wanna buy sex toys when they come in with the XXL’s. Honestly, I’d get her food and water bowls. Lucky likes the little fountain kind you don’t have to refill.”
DeAndre moved to the back of the store and grabbed a set of thick socks. “These go over the hooves and prevent them from fucking up your floor.”
“Do you have one?” Paul asked.
“I work with fluffys and fuckffies all day. I don’t own either.” DeAndre said while squatting down to look at Toast.
“She would fit a medium collar. You are gonna want one with a chip and your address put in.” He gestured to the collar.
“What about toys?” Paul said.
DeAndre smiled, “It’s not a fluffy. You don’t really need toys, A TV or a good movie would work but if you wanna play with a ball would probably work.”
“Toast w-want dat if Hoomin-stawwion am okay wit dat.” She pointed a hoof at a mushroom shaped chew toy.
Both men noticed the oddly phallic shaped toy. DeAndre noted that it was the Biophallus brand and not Hasbio. He squeezed it and realized that it didn’t squeak. He kept his face expressionless as the implications set in. He would make a note to have this toy behind the black curtain.
“I’ll take it too.” Paul said.
“Dank yew. Hoomin-stawwion!”
“Paul. Just Paul.”
“She seems sweet.” DeAndre said as he moved the items to the register.
“Your fuckffie must be pretty good to work here.” Paul said.
“He isn’t mine. He belongs to the shop. He is okay but I don’t like the way he looks at me.” DeAndre pointed to Lucky.
“Dis am Wucky face! Nu can hewp!”
“He doesn’t seem too bad.” Paul shrugged.
“If I had a chick look at me the way he does when he thinks I can’t see him. I’d be married.”
Toast looked at Lucky and noticed that the stallion would glance at Paul’s butt. He winked at her before mouthing the words ‘Wucky Mawe. Am Jeawous.’
Toast blushed and mouth back, ‘Dank yew.’
It didn’t take long before they arrived in his condo. A simple one bed and one bath condo that has seen its best years behind it.
Toast immediately began to move about the place and sniff everything. Paul began unpacking the Fluffmart stuff. He noticed that Toast grabbed a shirt off the floor and put it in his laundry basket. He watched as she started to clean his dirty clothes. He chalked it up to her training.
The fuckffie was in heaven, she could smell her new human’s scent on everything. Sweat in the clothes a bit of semen in the trash near the bed. He used tissues it seemed. The bathroom smelled like him mixed with a good body wash. She couldn’t help but wag her tail and hum to herself.
“You want tacos? I got leftovers.”
“Yes. Mistah Pauw.”
“Just Paul.”
“Okay. Wan Toast tu take twashies out?”
Paul rolled his eyes, “Are you nervous, Toast?”
She blushed, “Toast wan be gud enfie-fwiend!”
“Then just hop on the couch, relax and just talk. You live here, you aren’t my maid.” Paul said but couldn’t help smiling at the helpful little biotoy.
“Toast teww Pauw about wab?”
Paul nodded while heating up the tacos, the little mare sat up and puffed out her chest as if she was giving a speech.
“-An’ den da doctow put da whowe hand in da Stawwion’s poopie-pwace.” Toast let out a chuckle that ended in a loud snort.
“He probably didn’t eat any more shoestring after that, huh?” Paul chuckled between a mouthful of taco.
“Nu, dat Stawwion wike dat. Du again an’ again.”
“You know. Outside of the stupid voice, you make an alright pet.”
Toast nodded, “Pauw am gud pet too.”
“I’m pretty sure, you are the pet.”
Toast shook her head, “Nu uh. Toast am roommate.”
“Uh huh.” Paul shook his head. “Well when you pay rent, let me know.”
Toast tilted her head and a mischievous smile crossed her face, “Toast kno’ unnda way…”
“Nope. Not doing that.”
“Yet.” She said.
“For that, you are sleeping on the couch.” Paul stood up.
“See! Am woommate!” She chuckled.
Paul ignored her and rubbed his hand through her mane. The mare rested her head in his lap and closed her eyes, he flicked on the television. He couldn’t help but feel a bit content to have the little biotoy. His mind wandered as he turned on an old action movie, an old man had to use kung fu to kill ten thousand fluffies.
Well so far it isn’t weird. He assured himself as he petted her side. It’s just a biotoy.
Paul said that but couldn’t help wondering if he made a grave mistake in the purchase. She rolled till she was looking up at him. He glanced down at her, she looked at him for a long moment before speaking.
“Toast am happeh wit nyu pet.” She said.
Paul promptly rolled her on the floor. A soft ‘owie’ caught his ear before he placed his feet on her and continued watching television. She let out a forced ‘huuhuu’. He responded by placing his heels on her head.
“Staaaap. Nu wan….” She whined.
“Don’t care.”
“Huuhuu… so meeean….”
