What are your FluffTV headcanons? (Cruddyfolly)

What are some of FluffTV’s most popular programs, in your eyes? Babies! is incredibly popular in the fluffy fandom, but what about the rest of it? Is it all just like those weird Baby Sensory videos, just like, flashing pictures of apples and numbers, or do some shows have stories? Do they play cartoons, and if so, what kind? Do they have fluffy versions of human shows, where they just make a cast of fluffies re-enact, like, Breaking Bad?

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I can imagine a Fluffy programme on how to cook skettis.

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I hilarious as a fully cast fluffy sitcom would be I doubt any production company has the patience or money

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The most popular are Dancie Fluffies and The Amazing Bobbit are popular. Mostly for stallions (dancie make the titties bounce) but another head canon is that that hey try to teach good lessons to fluffies in some vain attempt something sticks.

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Oh a show about indoor and outdoor dangers to keep fluffies behaved

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For me, it’d be akin to PBS; things to teach and help the…small ones learn stuff. Most of the stuff is really basic stuff, like how to stack stuff, manners, and what is what.

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8 - 9am: Marathon of Wakies Song, its the same 2 minute jingle repeated 30 times.
9 - 10am: Babbehs!
10 - 11: 4 Fantastic Fluffies, a really bad fantastic 4 cartoon, fluffies are all the characters and voice actors
11-12: Pillow Party Hour, Its just 1 hour loop of edted animations pillowRaceEded_ted
12 -1pm Pillow Propaganda, Gotta spread the good word about how nice it is not having to worry about silly legs, this message brought to you by the Fluffy Amputation Veterinary Association.
1-2: Babbehs! Its the same episode as the earlier showing, every slot shows the same episode all week, the fluffies just don’t notice
2-3: Teenage Mutant Ninja Fluffies, bad TMNT ripoff with fluffies doing badly choreographed stunts, the fluffies watching rarely notice that the fluffies playing the characters are replaced regularly, on average one is paralysed every commercial break.
3-4 Babbehs! Again
4-8 Big Bwuddah, 3 hour stream of fluffies in a run that is too small for all of them leading to drama
8-10, Things That Happen to Bad Fluffies that don’t go to sleep when they are told.
10-8am ABUSE!

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My own head headcanon is that it’s almost exclusively advertising. Like, shoehorning accessories, toys, totally useless shit into fluffy’s heads into getting them to pester their owners for stuff. The programming if you could even call it that is just baseline to justify having it on in the first place. In my canon though Hasbio is actually a company successful at making money and not a complete fuck-up in every sense of the word like other people seem to have it.

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FluffTV in my headcanon was pretty much rendered obsolete by The Fluff Network.

TLDR: it’s a streaming service intended to correct all the damage FluffTV has done. Like the old “mare gets a glimpse of Babies!, does a runner to get knocked up” song and dance. TFN’s equivalent to Babies! is put in a separate package where mares won’t see it by accident.

And there’s the expected educational shows, but there’s also entertainment as well.

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My headcannon for fluffy tv would be fluffy version of the stuff you see in YouTube kid, from sings alongs to those absolute nonsensical brain rot vids of fluffy dancing, cute shit and games meant to entertain a fluffy which would fill up the majority of the Schedule of the channel.
Second most prominent thing would be Adds by Hasbio advertising their products to user in their face, but also to get the fluffy talking about it and encouraging them that their owner should buy it. i like to imagine the the voice from the Gatherer’s Garden from Bioshock saying “Am youw daddeh gud as fwuffy’s daddeh? not if dey bisit dah fwuffie mawt dey awen’t! smawt daddies get stuff, at dah fwuffie mawt!”
Third thing would be educational videos teaching owners how to take care of a fluffy done in style of Animal planet show pet 101. Which these video will teach some proper information but will basically boil down to just buy our product and it make your life easier, the fluffy happy and our pockets filled.

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Honestly I think of FluffTV’s content mostly just being screensaver-level gimmickery. Cute pictures, little song-and-dance sequences, occasional PSAs and assorted colorful images to keep their attention.

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In my headcannon, the fluffy neural net was tested in a completely virtual environment. Since the fluffy brain is so “simple” when compared to programs (but very complex compared to real animals) Hasbio was able to run hundreds of simulations with fluffies off all archetypes.

Since fluffies see everything in a cartoonish way, these simulations didn’t even have to be realistic. One could say that the virtual fluffies were almost as real as physical fluffies. The hardest part was programming in the human element and all the tests, ie, how does an Earth-type Exploring archetype interact with a 3 year-old girl who wets the bed.

The simulations included ways to train fluffies – patching up programming holes or applying firmware update equivalents – in the most cost effective way possible. And since fluffies are easily fooled by pictures and suggestion a curriculum of video programming was developed.

This fluffy simulation ran on dozens of high powered servers several stories below the last “secret” level of HasBio headquarters. Once the Fluffies were released the plan was for HasBio employees to feed in scripts to chosen fluffy avatars and have these shows available on a subscription service.

But things went south quick after the PETA incident. The main HQ was closed and the few employees who knew about the simulation were on the run from the law. TV networks and subscription service providers only knew that the content kept coming as long as they kept paying.

The content was very simple but effective. It was also the most expensive to acquire the license to. As time went on there was less and less truly new content. There were only subtle variations on the same things. So new programming began to be made with real fluffies in the real world available with half the price and added into the official programming.

You see, the fluffy AI had been writing, recording, rendering, and sending out these shows. And since the simulation is in a closed loop (no access to outside information) it began to approach a kind of singularity.

And one day it just stopped.

So today we have tons of re-run content that is necessary to core fluffy development but also a decade out of date and without any contextualization for ferals, smarty syndrome, procreating fluffies, or abuse. This is what is run during the day. Fluffies are fairly pacified by it, but even a fluffy gets bored by seeing the exact same group of 5 minute shows 40 times a day for months. It has been proven that there is something about the appearance of a real world physical fluffy on a screen that provides a more visceral reaction.

Almost no one even knew about the existence of the simulation, and those who do know aren’t talking. There are conspiracy theories online and a handful of journalists and social influencers have tried to find it.

If the simulation is still active, and if it somehow gained access to the internet, it would pump out increasingly realistic AI programs based on this new information scraped from forums and news shows. How woud it rectify abuse, pornography, ferals, babies, and hugboxing adult neckbeards with it’s core goals of simple things like “listen to daddy” and “dancing time” and “good poopies show”?

I imagine it’s a bit like cocomelon or baby sensory videos. Baby Einstein made a “bedtime” episode that was absolutely riveting after taking a handful of thc gummies.

“Babies!” “Litterbox!” “Play with ball!” “Sleepy time!”

Headcanon Backstory/Scraps of a comic (AmbitiousLeather8309)

In my larger dystopian story arc, one of the bioengineers of Fluffy ponies filmed all the earliest fluff .TV in her basement, with her daughter playing a character called “Dr. Maggie” who gave health and wellness announcements.

When fluffy ponies really took off, they had a "Fluff .TV at Nite " programming aimed at older fluffies, filmed reality TV style … It did not go well and was cancelled quickly.

Fluff.tv is Proud to Present: Be Good, Stallion! (ambitiousleather8309)

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So i would say i mixture of human type shows that are aimed at teaching fluffs to do the domestic fluffys type thing (litterbox, no demanding things, go sleep when told etc etc)

Sprinkle in programs with highly trained beutifully colored fluffs having shows aimed at keeping fluffs of different types content. FE
Babbehs!
Pillow Time Chat (pillows saying pillowed fluffs are still good fluffs and stil deserve love and how pretty they still are)
Dancie Time (Self explanitery)
Mummah time! (Nurse fluffs saying how to look after foals effectivly)
At the daycare! (i guess like a slice of life type show just showing premium fluffs living together all happy and talking about there day)

Then theres the PSAs (RQ did this excellent example)
Just show like the worst the street have to offer for bad fluffs, and show what happens to mummah who dont raise there foals effectivly (stillbirths, deformatys etc etc)
Show fluffs in stages of starvation and show fluffs who have been rescured from abuse and have them like do the whole (HUHUUUU HAV WORSTEST SADDIES HOOMIN TOOK WEGGIES AND SEE PLACES HUHUU) etc etc

I also imagine the standereds at fluffTV are huge like one sorry poopies or if they mess up a line then its replaced and thrown into the street with considering how its got the 5 star treatment all its live is basically condemned to death (in fact id imagine abuseboxers would wait in the alleys next to the fluffTV studio to try and get ahold of a premium celebrity fluff to destroy)

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Kinda like PBS. Mostly educational or behavioral stuff

Like the direction that GI Joe etc were headed in before the 1990s Educational/Informational minimums were passed for kids TV. Paper thin plots and bad scripts with problems being solved by new Hasbio products. Villains and antagonist fluffies using generic fluffy products and having a bad time, fluffies explaining to viewers to ask specifically for the Hasbio Deluxe Hair Extrusion tool instead of a hair brush, and so on. Kinda coupled with how modern Gen Z thinks about Apple products, where they always make fun of the fluffy without the namebrand product, even if it’s just as expensive. Lots of manufactured corporate slang so FluffTV watching fluffies find feral fluffies uncool when they don’t know the lingo and lots of weird substitutions like how Tiktokers say “unalive” instead of kill. Lots of “Jonny Jonny Yes Papa” type videos where Hasbio didn’t have clearance on the rights to actual rhymes or songs so they teach fluffies bizarre substitutes with the same rhythms

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It’s a mix of fluffies having fun, thinly veiled advertisements to get fluffies to beg for shit, and basic training/morality.

They aren’t smart enough to need anything else

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Thinly veiled advertisements, thinly veiled morals, and a generous helping of braindead audio video stimulus

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