An idea given to me by @StoneRouge. (Spoilers in the description): "A pampered spoiled fluffy and its stupid owner(s) are on a boat when a tidal wave hits the boat and sinks it, Somehow the fluffy survived and is stranded at sea on a piece of lumber. The fluffy does its best to survive, from drinking the seawater, eating their shit, Self Cannibalism, ETC.
The fluffy ends up getting rescued by evil pirates and ends up tortured by them. It gets one of its eyes ripped out by the captains’ parrot, and a few of the crewmates cut off some of its legs.
Eventually, the evil pirates get in a fight with a different group of pirates. Ending with their deaths, the captain from the winning side takes the fluffy as spoils of war and keeps it as a loving pet."
“Daddeh, wook! Wook! Outsidies am so pwetty!” The unicorn stallion called as he stared excitedly out the ship’s porthole. He was standing on a wooden crate, which helped him reach the human-height porthole that showed the view of the outside. His toothpaste blue tail wagged as he gazed out at the open sea, bouncing on his hind hooves in happiness. His red eyes glittered in wonder as he watched fish and seaweed pass by his view.
He and his two owners had been on a boat trip for a week, and he’d gotten over the seasickness about 3 days into their trip. He and his owners were the only people on the boat; and the boat was currently on autopilot. When he’d woken up that morning not barfing out his dinner, he knew he’d be fine. He’d gotten over his fear of water within a few hours of watching the waters roll and shine in the sun.
The unicorn’s name was Chromis. His owners loved the ocean, and even named him after a tropical fish. His family took vacations to the sea all the time; they were stupidly rich. This was just his first time out with them on the ocean, as he’d only been their fluffy for a year.
At home, golden candelabras glittered along the painted walls, and chandeliers reflected sunlight through the huge windows of their spacious house. Soft plush red carpeting done in a floral pattern would tickle his hooves as he walked. He even had a large saferoom of his own, absolutely filled with toys and the best tasting food there was for a fluffy.
His collar was shiny, and vertically striped with orange and sea green. His tag was golden, and heart shaped. He’d been given it on his first day with them, when he’d just been adopted. His mummah had told him that the heart shape was proof that their hearts were with him always. He’d nearly cried tears of joy when he heard that.
He had a routine too. Every morning, he’d shut off his alarm (They’d bought him his own alarm clock of all things) and go see his mummah. She’d brush his overly soft green fur as she sang sweetly to him. Then he’d have a breakfast of spaghetti-flavored kibble (Though it was vegetable based, so it was healthy for him) and go play around the house until his daddeh came home from work.
He’d leap into his daddeh’s arms for a snuggle, and then his owners would push him on the fluffy-tailored swing they had in the expansive backyard. Every night, his owners would sing him a lullaby until he fell asleep. It was always the same song, called “Bones In the Ocean”. His mummah and daddeh would stroke his mane and sing:
“Oh, I bid farewell to the port and the land,
And I paddle away from brave England’s white sands,
To search for my long ago forgotten friends,
To search for the place I hear all sailors end.”
He loved his life, and wouldn’t trade it for anything. He was well-fed, happy and very very healthy. They loved him and treated him as their own son; because to them, he was.
Chromis’s daddeh laughed and ruffled his slicked-back mane. “It sure is, buddy.” He pointed to an orange and white fish that flitted across the view of the window. “See that one? What’s it called, little guy?”
“Cwownfish!!” Chromis answered immediately, grinning happily.
“Good boy! That’s right!” A sketti treat was tossed into the stallion’s awaiting mouth. Chromis purred as he chewed it, savoring the flavor. Then he got back down on all four gold-colored hooves leapt down from the crate.
The ship tipped to the side, and Chromis landed on his nose, which caused a rather painful nosebleed.
“Owwies! Why huwt Chwomis, meanie ship?” The unicorn whined as his parents ran over to him. His mummah scooped him up.
“Poor baby, you’ve got a nosebleed! Let’s get that patched up, sweetie.” She cooed. Chromis immediately calmed and snuggled into her arms. She sang a verse of his favorite lullaby to him.
“As the souls of the dead fill the space of my mind,
I’ll search without sleeping 'til peace I can find.
I fear not the weather, I fear not the sea,
I remember the fallen, do they think of me?
When their bones in the ocean forever will be.”
The pain seemed to lessen, and he cooed, smiling. Unfortunately for him and his family, fate had decided at that moment to say “fuck you”. He glanced towards the porthole again and all relaxation left his body. He went rigid, and his eyes went wide.
“MUMMAH! DADDEH! BIG WAWA!” He screamed. His two owners looked out to porthole and screamed. He leapt from his mummah’s arms and his daddeh zoomed up the steps towards the boat’s steering wheel. But it was too late. The huge wave slammed into the boat hard, capsizing it fast. While his parents were rich, they hadn’t bothered to spend a lot on a well-made boat. The boat was cheap, and so things began to break. The porthole that they’d been staring out of popped open, and water poured into the spacious part of the boat.
The boat began to sink, and Chromis didn’t know what to do. His daddeh was nowhere to be found. He paddled around in the churning, salty water. “Mummah! MUMMAH!” He called, sobbing. No answer. He whipped his gaze around, and found blood in the water. “…Mummah?” He whimpered. He looked down. He could see her at the bottom of the boat, her neck twisted at an angle that was disturbingly wrong.
More water gushed into the boat through the new holes, and he had no choice; he had to either get out or sink. His daddeh was gone; his mummah was forever sleepies. It was either swim or die. He paddled out of the large porthole and into the open ocean. The deep water was no longer pretty. It was choppy, and littered with debris. He clambered onto a large floating board and shivered. The huge wave had already passed.
The ship began to sink more. Within minutes, the ship was already out of sight. Finally, the gravity of it all hit him. He’d lost the only people who’d ever cared about him. He started to bawl.
“WAAAAAAAH! MUMMAH, DADDEH! HUU, HUU, HUUUUU!” But nobody was there to hear him. Not his parents, not the fish, and not even the boat. “NU AM FAIW! MUMMAH AND DADDEH AM GUD HOOMANS! WHY?! HUU, HUUU!” The unicorn sobbed pitifully for hours, heartbroken. His nose stopped bleeding. He got hungry. But there was nothing to eat. His collar felt heavy around his throat.
A few hours after that, he got up and started to pace. He needed food. He gasped a huge lungful of air, and plunged his head underwater. He’d seen bears on tv open their mouths and have fish jump right in; so it could work for him, right?
Wrong. He instantly got a mouthful of nasty, overly salty water. He coughed and shook his head. “Icky, nu wike wawas…” He sniffled. But he knew he couldn’t spend all his time crying. He had to do something. He plunged his head underwater again and again, but he caught no fish. He held his breath for as long as he could under there, but no fish swam into his mouth.
And he was thirsty. So he lapped at the saltwater, but he only ended up thirstier afterwards and his throat was dry. He learned that the water was bad; it didn’t help him.
When night fell, the only light that was there for him was the moon; clean and white as a skull. He remembered the old lullaby the best he could, and he began to sing to himself, trying to calm down.
“Pwot a couwse to da night to a pwace I once knu,
To a pwace where mai hope died awong wif mai cwew,
So I swawwow mai saddies and face wife’s wastest test,
To find pwomise ob peace an’ da sowace of west.
As da songs ob da dead fiww da space ob mai eaws,
Theiw waughtew wike babbehs, theiw beckonin’ cheews.
Mai heawt wongs to join dem, sing songs ob da sea
I wemembew da fawwen, do they fink ob me?
When theiw bones in da ocean fowevebah wiww be.”
He fell asleep fitfully that night, under the vast expanse of stars. At least that was pretty. But he had nightmares all night. Of his parents dying, the ship being attacked, him being submerged underwater during the tidal wave.
The next morning, he needed to crap. But there was no litterbox. And there was still no food. He had no choice. He whimpered and hung his head embarassedly as he let himself crap right onto the board. He hated it immediately; it stunk and it burned his nostrils. A stressed fluffy made horrendously smelly solid waste. The same was true for animals like chickens and dogs.
He turned right around and started to eat. He threw up the first mouthful, but he forced himself to re-eat it. It was either that or starve. The salty, bitter taste filled his mouth and he gagged. It was horrible, and he despised every second of it. But he didn’t want to die.
A few days later, he was skin and bones. His ribes poked from his sides and his legs shook. He could hardly stand. He’d eaten and drank nothing but his own waste; and he’d already sapped all the nutrients he could from that. His waste was doing nothing for him anymore.
He began to gnaw on part of his left hind leg. He muffled a scream into his own matted fur as he yanked a strip of flesh from the body part. Blood poured, tears fell and screams were thrown into the empty air. He lapped up his blood and munched on his own leg until he hit bone. It hurt so, so much. But he was finally less hungry. He fainted just as the bow of a wooden ship began to sail by. He was scooped up roughly in a net and dropped unceremoniously onto the wooden deck.
He was jolted awake by a man yanking him up to eye-level. That man’s face was wrinkled from the sun, was covered by a beard and one eye was missing. The missing eye was covered by a black eyepatch. He was staring into the curious gaze of a pirate. He’d been read to about them by his now-dead parents, and he knew they were a nasty bunch. He now wished that he’d been either left on that plank or died with his owners on the ship.
“H-Hewwo…” He stammered.
"‘Hewwo’? What be this garbage way of speak?” The pirate laughed in his face and spittle landed in Chromis’s eyes. He blinked rapidly. The stench of the pirate’s foul breath was nothing compared to the literal crap he’d been forced to eat for days on end.
The unseen group of pirates around him laughed too; startling him so badly he had an accident. Right on the pirate’s well-polished boot. The pirate stopped laughing and scowled.
“Ye bilge rat! How dare ye?” Chromis was dropped back onto the deck, feeling slight pain shoot up his skeletal legs. “Clean it up! Lick it clean or I’ll have ye thrown off the ship!” The pirate screamed. This pirate was apparently the smarty friend of the bunch; the other pirates followed his orders without question. Chromis internally shrugged as he lapped the crap up. He’d been doing this for days and he was used to it by now. It was still horrid, but he had to do it.
After he was done, the pirate gave him a kick, sending him sprawling to the middle of the ship’s deck. “I say we have a bit of fun with the wee landlubber! What say ye?” The cruel captain called to his crew. The crew cheered in reply, pulling out swords and daggers.
Chromis knew he was in danger. His heart dropped into his empty stomach and he ran. He couldn’t run very fast; he was starving and weak. So the captain’s pet parrot caught up to him quickly. It was in search of a snack. The parrot pinned Chromis under a huge clawed foot and jabbed its sharp curved beak into his right eye.
“SCREEEEEEEEE!” He wailed in agony. He’d never felt this much pain before in his life. “HUU, HUU HUUU! WET CHWOMIS GO, MEANIE BIWDIE MUNSTAH!” He screamed. The parrot payed no heed and yanked that eyeball right out of its socket. His screams increased in volume, becoming almost human. He didn’t even notice the whole crew walking up to him, surrounding him. One of the less sick-in-the-head pirates winced at Chromis’s cries, which sounded too much like a human for his tastes. But the others couldn’t care less.
“Hold the slimy beast down!” the captain ordered. It only took two crewmates to hold him down after they shooed the parrot away. The parrot landed only a few feet in front of him and began to gobble up its snack. Chromis nearly fainted when he saw his own eye being torn apart right in front of him.
The pirates laughed, and Chromis couldn’t see behind him. He wouldn’t have appreciated it anyway, seeing as one of the pirates was holding his dagger directly above his left hind leg. Another pirate held a short sword over the other hind leg. They raised both their weapons, and brought them down again, beginning to saw. He felt them saw through muscles and tendons he couldn’t name. He felt them hit bone, and still continue to saw. The worst part was, the blades hadn’t been sharpened in a while. Chromis screamed so loudly his voice gave out. He passed out from the agony.
He awoke from a loud noise later on, in the evil captain’s quarters. He was lying in a rough net, trapping him in a bag-like cage on the captains desk. He didn’t dare cry loudly this time, no matter how badly he wanted to bawl his little broken heart out. He didn’t want anyone to come find him and torture him more.
Another loud sound; an explosion. It rocked the boat and hurt his ears, and Chromis was instantly reminded of his old dead family with their sunken ship. He started to scream. He couldn’t handle another sinking ship! Not again!
“SCREEEEEE! WAI SHIP SINKIN’? HUUUU HUUUUU! CHWOMIS NU WAN’ DIE! WAI EVEWYTHIN’ SU MEAN TO CHWOMIS?!” He yelled.
The captain he feared so much angrily burst through the door, the door nearly flying off the hinges. The door smacked the wall loudly. “SHUT UP, YE BILGE RA-” The captain was interrupted with a cannonball straight through one side of his body and out the other. He fell to the deck of the ship, dead. Chromis gagged, and vomited the leftover waste that was in his stomach. Now his cage stank of vomit, but it was nearly drowned out by a heavy, unknown scent. He didn’t know it was immense amounts of gunpowder from an enemy ship’s cannons.
He shivered and shook. Then, he saw strange hooks attach themselves to the side of the ship. More pirates made their way onto the ship using those. A pirate in a large hat with a single feather sticking out of it made his way into the now-dead captain’s quarters. This must have been the leader of the enemy ship. The captain.
The captain soon noticed the strange, still-shiveringing creature in the net on the desk. He walked over and lifted the net up, and his eyebrows shot up. “Sink me! What kind of torture did these scurvy dogs put ye through?” Strangely, a feminine voice came from the captain, and Chromis realized it wasn’t a man at all. A woman was in charge of the new crew that was winning against the old crew. He thought only men were captains; guess he was wrong.
Still, Chromis didn’t dare speak. He remembered what had happened last time. He gulped and held in frightened sobs. The captain sliced the ropes binding him and let him fall into her hands. He yelped and burst into fresh sobs when he landed on his hind leg stumps; they had already scabbed over but hurt immensely.
She carried him out of the captain’s quarters and called out “Give no quarter! Cleave them to the brisket!” Her crew jeered at the losing pirates and began slicing them with their swords. They soon fell to the ground dead. Chromis didn’t feel sick this time.
“Yoo bad, bad hoomans…” He snarled at the dead pirates. “Chwomis hatechu. Yoo took mai weggies and gabe wowstest huwties. Hatechu. Yoo… Yoo biwge wats.” He turned away from the grisly scene and scowled angrily, hot tears running down his face. The new captain patted his back gingerly and made her way back onto her ship.
Soon enough, everyone was back on the new ship, and the old ship was ordered to be sunk. The cannons fired, and this time Chromis wasn’t scared. He knew this crew would treat him differently, better.
Time passed. His wounds healed, and he was given fluffy-tailored peg legs and an eyepatch. He learned how to walk around on a moving ship after falling a few times, much to everyone’s amusement. He was given a sharp metal fitting to the tip of his horn; a small dagger used for self defense.
He joined the crew in battle. His favorite move was to wait until the enemies weren’t looking, reach down and slice the enemy’s achilles tendon. He became someone to watch out for, someone who could cause your death with a simple wound in an important place.
Chromis never spoke a word to humans again, as he chose not to. He didn’t like to speak to people, and he was just fine with that. He became a silent killer; slicing up enemies as he sped around rival ship decks. The captain, whose name was Anne, kept him as a beloved pet and comrade for the rest of his life.
His old family was never forgotten; often times at night he’d sit up on he edge of the deck, staring out at the ocean as it reflected the moon. Silent tears of mourning would run down his face as he’d sing the old beloved lullaby.
“As da souws ob da dead wive fowebah in mai mind,
As I wive aww da yeaws dat dey weft me behind,
I’ww stay on da showe but stiww gaze at da sea,
I wemembah da fawwen an’ dey fink ob me,
Fow ouw souws in da ocean togethew wiww be.
I wemembah da fawwen an’ dey fink ob me
Fow ouw souws in da ocean togethew wiww be.”
Sometimes he swore he could hear his old owners’ voices singing along. And Chromis was happy.
