The following is an article transcript reprinted every year in Fluffcare magazine, a monthly release available in the checkout line at most major grocery chains:
Holiday Mishaps - Turkey Day Dangers
November Edition
The life of a fluffy is a dangerous thing. While responsible owners take great effort to keep their precious four-legged family members safe, accidents can happen. More fluffy accidents happen around the holidays than any time of the year1 and thanksgiving is one of the worst. With many families traveling, the stress of unfamiliar environments and large gatherings can be stressful for fluffies as well.
As a cautionary tale for the reader, we have prepared a series of hypothetical scenarios based on past reports of injury and death that have befallen innocent fluffies. Beyond the normal hazards of unsafe foods2 and choking hazards3, here are some examples of Turkey Day Dangers:
SUNSHINE
Sunshine is a bright yellow well behaved earth mare. She is excited to go with her family, âThe Devonsâ, to their relatives for âTanksgivingâ but is scared of the scary âvroom vroomâ. They make their way up Interstate 95 from their family home in Florida to their relatives in New York on a long road trip in their crowded and packed minivan.
Traffic is bad as some surprise snow and a 4-car pileup cause traffic to come to a standstill somewhere in Pennsylvania. The sound of cars honking, and the long time spent in the car cause Sunshine to make an accident. The Devons decide to pull over at a rest stop to clean Sunshineâs pet carrier which requires her to be taken out.
The family daughter watches Sunshine as she takes a potty break and plays in the snow while the dad cleans the pet carrier in the restroom. When the father returns, they put Sunshine back in her carrier in the back of the car. The daughter doesnât close the door of the carrier because she is still petting her precious pet, but her mom calls her over to the vending machines to grab a snack for the road.
This is when tragedy strikes. A semi-truck pulling through the rest stop blares its horn as children from another family signal at him with their hands to honk. Sunshine is terrified from the sound and jumps from the car and runs towards the picnic benches near a cluster of trees to hide from the loud and unfamiliar noise.
When the family returns to the car, the father closes the trunk without realizing that Sunshine is gone. They realize an hour later that she is gone when the daughter decides to share some of her cheese puffs with her favorite pet.
They call the rest stop and the state employee on staff finds her, frozen to death under a picnic table with tears forming icicles in the corners of her eyes. A tragic but avoidable fate.
MAPLE
Maple is a burnt orange unicorn filly that belongs to the Smiths. She is what we affectionately refer to as a âSplorin Babyâ. Her normal safe room is the family guest room. Her family has repurposed the guest room to host relatives for the week and has stuck her in the downstairs bathroom for the time being. Their guests are aware of the rules for keeping but are not used to stepping around fluffies and keeping certain doors shut.
Mistakes happen which result in Maples getting out and âSplorinâ around the house. The Smiths find her quickly and return her to the bathroom frequently throughout the week. On the morning of Thanksgiving Day, the family is distracted. Their 6-year-old son takes the foal and sticks her in a laundry basket to watch the annual parade. Maple is excited to see the Hasbio mascot float in the parade and the musical number performed by âgiantâ dancing fluffies from her favorite FluffTV show on a parade float.
He walks away thinking that Maple was safe inside the basket. Fluffies have short attention spans and she quicky loses interest. Maple finds out she can climb from the shallow basket with some effort and begins to wander towards the smell of delicious ânummiesâ in the kitchen.
A series of unfortunate circumstances have occurred in the kitchen, busy with the stovetop the father has forgotten to preheat the oven. A relative has grabbed a stepstool to reach the fancy dishware above the stove. The mother had placed the pies and sweet potato casserole in the bottom half of the double electric convection oven before turning around to direct other members of the family about the kitchen.
Maple climbed up onto the stepstool. Seeing the delicious marshmallows on top of the sweet potatoes and climbed into the oven to eat them. The mother, not looking kicks the door of the oven shut and turns it on. Maple quickly becomes full from eating the marshmallows and falls asleep in the casserole pan. The foal may wake up and call for help but may not be heard over the sound of fume hood fans and kitchen appliances.
The Smiths are alerted to the smell of burning and panic, they smell burnt marshmallows and quickly open the oven to save the casserole. Instead, they are greeted to the sight of a singed and bloated foal corpse splayed across a bed of orange mush. A tragic and unfortunate fate.
SNOWBALL
Snowball is a solid white Stallion with an extra fluffy coat. His family, the Delgados, drove a few blocks across town to visit their in-laws the Garcias. The Garcias owned a large Husky but kept him on one side of the house and out of the kitchen with a series of toddler safety gates diving the house neatly in 2. This kept the fluffy safe and the family was unconcerned with having the Delgadosâ fluffy wander around for their short visit.
Both the Husky and Snowball were curious, and Snowball tried to talk to the dog fluffy through the toddler gates. Neither family minded as this kept both pets occupied while they ate dinner and talked among themselves. After Dinner the Delgado daughter showed off her fluffy to the Garcia daughter.
Eventually both families decided to eat pumpkin pie for dessert outside. They made their plates and carried everything to eat outside to the patio. They called their kids for dessert, and they rushed across the house to the patio door. They forgot to latch the toddler gate properly.
With everyone outside, the husky pushed his way through the toddler gate. He excitedly pawed at the fluffy and Snowball played back at first. Eventually, the Husky became riled up and barked. This terrified the small stallion. Snowball turned and ran away. This caused the huskyâs hunting instinct to kick in. The excited dog lunged at the fluffy and grabbed him firmly in his mouth. The husky shook the fluffy around like a chew toy as Snowball screamed in terror.
The sound of the bark and the screaming stallion alerted both families and they rushed in to pry the Snowball from the Huskyâs mouth. Snowball fortunately survived but was paralyzed halfway down his body from a broken spine. A trip to the emergency vet set the Delgados back hundreds of dollars and Snowball now requires walking wheels and a diaper. An Unfortunate and expensive mishap.
All 3 of the above examples were easily avoidable tragedies. Finding an affordable fluffy sitter for the holidays is a difficult task. Consider boarding your fluffy in a Hasbio certified long term daycare facility this holiday season.
Consider HUG⥠Daycare. HUG⥠is a Hasbio certified nationwide daycare service with caring professionally trained Fluffcare specialists dedicated to keeping your fluffy safe and happy. Donât take a risk with that special family member during the holidays this year.
Chose HUGâĄ
1. Department of Agriculture, biohazard disposal cause of death reporting statistics.
2. Hasbio official fluffy feeding guide, Toxic household foods for Fluffies
3. National Association of Fluffy Veterinarians, Top 10 fluffy injuries
*All names and locations have been changed for anonymity.
*This article was sponsored by Hugbox Daycare, inc.
I might make a December edition, let me know if there are any short stories you want to see in it.