Hasbio by the Numbers: A Consumer Business Report (By: EzPete)

The following is a transcript from a business magazine, it collects dust as it sits on a table in some veterinary lobby. Additional tables and citations omitted.


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Above is a photo of the new Alicorn Supercenter nearing completion.

With nearly 80 million household fluffies in the US and an average life expectancy of six years, approximately 36 thousand are born every day. Around 1 in 4 fluffies in the US is acquired from a licensed Fluffmart. 134 thousand fluffies are delivered once biweekly among every Fluffmart location averaging around 50 foals per delivery to each of the nearly 2700 fluffmarts throughout the country.

Thanks to improvements in dietary hormones and breeding practices, Hasbio can average 7 foals per litter without miscarriage in their regional breeding facilities. Much higher than an unauthorized breeder. Foals are generally shipped off in litters of 6 with the excess foals being culled immediately for defects, recycled to maintain breeding stock, or in the case of bad colors sold for medical research.

25 regional breeding centers produce around 3200 fluffies a week each of which 2700 will be shipped between alternating weeks to different stores. Around 90 mares give birth a day with 2 weeks between each pregnancy at each location meaning each breeding center has around 2900 mares. Each mare is given a 4x4 pen, with additional space accounted for, each center is around 100,000 square foot.

Because about 5% of shipped stock, or 1 million is unsellable, it requires the distribution and disposal of an additional 38 thousand fluffies biweekly. Each store averaging 2.374 Biweekly. These are handled in euthanasia centers in accordance with the SRA.

In major areas like the East and West Coasts, the fluffmarts are close enough for local centers which humanely euthanizes defective stock from anywhere between 50 and 100 stores. For small locations in the midwest, stock is either mailed to a regional bio-disposal center or euthanasia is contracted out to veterinarians when shipping costs are excessive.

At an average retail price of $249.95, that generates a gross revenue of 875 million dollars for Fluffmart which is mostly eaten up by rent, wages, logistics, legal compliance, and the fluffies themselves in the form of kibble. Hasbio and its subsidiary Fluffmart operate on a narrow profit margin and take great efforts to minimize expenses. Fluffy food, toys, and other goods generate additional revenue for the company.

Limiting excess production of officially licensed fluffies both keeps them in the green by not needing to cull excess stock but in fact also generates some artificial scarcity throughout the year around important holidays and dates including Christmas and School Graduations which increases the image of prestige and exclusivity the company has tried in past years to recover.

Fluffmart does manage their stock to have an excess of breeders around this time to prevent losing sales to backyard breeders but many consumers prefer the inferior product for a lower price tag when holiday spending crunches the budget.

The average Fluffmart employs around 10 full or part time employees. Each breeding center employs around 250 employees between caretakers, foal sorting and packaging, admin, and drivers. Corporate employs another 600 employees who manage various things like advertising, research and development, and procurement.

With seasonal employees included, Hasbio and its subsidiary Fluffmart employs over 35000 people every year. Additional subsidiaries including FluffTV are not included in this number. The average income of a fluffmart employee is $24,000 per year, this is lowered by part time and seasonal employees. Managers and Breeding Center employees can start earning on average $36-45,000 per year.

A further breakdown of expenses and revenue are unavailable as Hasbio does not report financial data or intellectual information it is not legally required to disclose. However, some basic assumptions can be made based on the company’s renovation of its regional flagship stores and the opening of a new Alicorn supercenter in Dallas last quarter indicate a slow recovery of and growth.

After the initial feral fluffy crisis, shelters were initially overwhelmed. At present, above half of all household fluffies are shelter adoptions. After feral herds were decimated by Fluffy Paramyxovirus several years ago, shelters began to empty and as a result the average age of an adopted stray has risen dramatically. Feral populations have yet to recover and the virus remains as deadly to unvaccinated fluffies as ever.

Industry insiders report Hasbio has plans to expand their market share as many families, according to national polling, will seek to adopt a new fluffy when their current one passes away of old age. If this does materialize, Officially licensed Hasbio fluffies could shoot back up to over half of all households.

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*A further breakdown of retail types is available in tables on the next page
*feral category includes single household litter adoptions

Investors are speculating that Hasbio may go public next year to acquire liquidity to expand more rapidly before the next holiday season. Others are warning against such speculation, citing Hasbio’s repeated efforts to keep their original Fluffy production research secret to prevent other bioengineering firms from riding on their coattails. Research which may legally be required to become publicly disclosed.

Should Hasbio become publicly traded, this may be an excellent way to diversify your portfolio with quick short-term growth and guaranteed long-term stability given the track record Hasbio has shown by bouncing back and stabilizing finances in the face of various unexpected market fluctuations.


I decided I am going to do a Holiday Mishaps article for Christmas, message me if you want to collaborate and have an entry in it.

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I’d say that the majority of HasBio profits come from companion products (food, toys, fluffy smartpads, etc). They probably lose money on their official version of FluffTV but it is the best way to sell product to whiny fluffies.

according to national polling, will seek to adopt a new fluffy when their current one passes away of old age

more like “as soon as their inconvenience outweighs their cuteness” so 2 years

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Damn, if they come from secondary products, they use the system of “I’m selling cheap consoles, the video games are overpriced.”

I remember seeing a comic in which they gave you a newborn baby whose tail was torn off and magnets were placed on its body, so that you could later buy objects and decorate them.

The price of the bug was ridiculous, but a “poo” colored tail was 200 dollars.

Obviously it ended up in the trash chirping for its mummah

(google traductor)

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Yup, that’s this (I hate the idea, but it would totally happen if they were real) :
New From Hasbio: Fashion Fluffs! [The_Agony_Presence]

This is fascinating to me, working in manufacturing. Nice world building, @ezpete!

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I like to think they only use Hasbio products and whine if they don’t. Oh that’s not a Hasbio ‘Good Poopies’ litter tray? That’s just a regular cat litter pan? Someone is going to get shit all over their walls.

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The fuzzy ones didn’t turn out well either.

In my headcannon they arent super programmed like that. Hasbio just gaslights the fluffies and customers to believe cetain products are better:

Pet beds made to simulate fluffy fur, huggy friends based on FluffTV characters, specially formulated food designed around a physiology only they know the details of, and now fluffy vaccines.

Good fluffies make good poopies. Good owners buy shallow litterboxes that dont trip fluffies.

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Yea, if you take the number of employees times their average wage it is much higher than the gross revenue of the fluffies themselves.

I was running the numbers in my current story for a fluffmart and euthanasia center and wanted to see how feasible it was and then started to think about just the raw numbers of millions of fluffies.

Theres like 60 million pet cats in the US, 90 million dogs. So I based estimates off that. Estimates of stray cats vary but I’m assuming stray fluffies peaked at around 100 million before disease and pest control took its toll and also assume most wild fluffies are too poorly behaved/antisocial towards humans to be adopted if captured.

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I have always had the feeling that the ferals who end up in cities are the rejected ones from the countryside or domestic ones who either quickly learn to flee the city or die.

It is really very difficult to try to see a death statistic, but I am clear that of 8 babies, in the city 4 will die before the first 4 days and two more before they reach 12, while in the countryside the % of those 8 arrive is higher (the mere fact that they are not fussy and eat grass already solves the food problem)

(google traductor)

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Also, I corrected a line where I somehow omitted a word. The average age of an adopted stray has climbed significantly. Both because desperate mares aren’t abandoning entire litters in urban and suburban areas and because there aren’t enough strays in built up areas now to replenish shelters.

There was an initial wave of stray adoptions which kept the average age low around a year and a half. Now that ferals aren’t breeding rapidly they’ve basically got a Japan situation where the average adopted feral is 4-6 years old and they’ll all cross the sgetti bridge in the next 5 years.

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I love this! Well-researched and laid out, good corpo-speak, my little heart just lights up when I see a chart or a graph. Scratched all the different bits of my brain in the right places.

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Woah, Fluffmart employees can almost afford rent and food! I also love the numbers in this, it’s all so meticulous

It didnt take exceptionally long, I just took 80 million and divided it down by made up figures.

Often people act like theres 2 trillion fluffies running around and Hasbio is the illuminati so I just found a number that seemed plausible and figured out how big hasbio would actually be. 2700 stores nationwide ended up actually being really plausible.

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NGL, this is exactly why a lot of ferret owners use puppy pads instead of litter boxes. Ferrets have little tiny leggies and can’t be bothered climbing over the lip of the box.

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