Poopiest_of_bebbehs' head-canon index

Hello there, this is just a few cliff notes about my head-canon and is just here as a reminder for myself and also serves as a quick link to give to anyone with questions about why certain things in one of my stories are the way they are.

  1. HASBIO hardcoded censorship into fluffies:
    In my canon it is impossible for fluffies to learn and reproduce common swear words and offensive phrases, even being exposed to bad language causes them extreme discomfort, anxiety and headaches. This explains why fluffies in my universe will use terms like “enf off” and “nu enfin’ way” to express themselves dramatically, even in life or death situations where using actual swear words would be more appropriate. This censorship was hard coded by HASBIO specifically to avoid offending their customer base. There are a few fluffies that can swear properly but they are very rare cases and these abnormalities are typically a result of some form of cognitive difference at birth or brain damage.

  1. All fluffies have a desire for humans to love them, yes, even smarties deep down.

  1. Fluffies will mentally break when exposed to human on human violence:
    as fluffies are programmed to view humans as some form of benevolent godly creature, witnessing two humans or two groups of humans committing acts of unspeakable cruelty to one another would be like a human witnessing the end of the universe.

  1. Not all fluffies are made equal:
    Most fluffies are very npc-like in how they behave and view the world, but there are rare occasions where fluffies are born with a higher capacity of self-awareness. This higher level of understanding results in more quirky personality traits such as obsession, hyperfixation, addiction, slightly higher intelligence, better problem solving skills and a capacity for greater anti-social behavior.

  1. Cannibal fluffies are not a result of genetic mutation occurring in regular fluffies but were a project created and released specifically to cull the population.

  1. HASBIO was saved from going under by being purchased by MEDTEL, the competitor bio-toy division of MATTEL.

  1. Fluffies are immune to painkillers and anesthesia. They can only be knocked out properly via head trauma or by getting them drunk until they black out.

  1. All fluffies have an ingrained but extremely vague understanding of both heaven and god as concepts:
    During the production of fluffies, HASBIO was teetering on the edge of financial ruin, due to how much money they had poured into the project. To keep themselves afloat, the company took a few shady payments under the table by an unnamed religious organisation, a bribe in exchange for programming their product with an understanding of heaven (sketti-wand) and god (sky-daddeh), so as to help the toy’s child owner possibly accept religious indoctrination. Although the bribery quickly dried up and the programming never went further than that. Simply resulting in a few lines of pointless, dead end neurological code.

  1. fluffies are not the only biotoys:
    in my headcanon, many companies have attempted to take the prestigious biotoy market but so very few have succeeded outside of a few companies located in both japan, Germany and south Korea. since fluffies became an ecological disaster, intense laws were passed on an international level that demanded rigid, costly and extreme safety and containment measures that were simply so expensive and gave such little wiggle room that most toy companies turned away at the prospect. With that being said, only fluffies are a world wide menace, being the first and greatest failure of the biotoys concept as a whole, while the other biotoys on the market that have squeezed themselves passed the rigorous international laws and restrictions are fully working, completely coded and have taken the spot as lovable and family appropriate pets, a position once destined for the shitrats, if only fate had been kinder to them.

  1. Chirpie = programming not fully active:
    The fluffy cognitive programming kicks in as soon as a chirpie opens their eyes. Before a foal opens their eyes, they are not yet properly sentient and are running on basic natural instincts, since the cognitive engrams that give all fluffies a rough idea of the world is yet to activate; meaning that there is not yet any concept of language, milkies, love, huggies, skettie or mummah and daddeh, until their software kicks in and they begin looking around.

  1. Pre-breakout vs Post-breakout fluffies:
    Generation 1 and Generation 2 fluffies are divided by tiny mutations that have resulted from natural selection. You can find out more here.

  1. SBS Likelihood and age:
    Sensitive baby syndrome, natural derping and birth defects becomes more and more likely as a fluffy mare ages. The prime breeding years for a fluffy mare is anywhere between 1 to 3, with every year following resulting in diminishing returns. The ages of 4 to 6 are considered middle aged and 7 to 10 being elderly. On average a fluffy is expected to live about 10 years, with 15 being the absolute max a fluffy could live with the utmost premium care, love and medicine.

  1. Heartbreak death:
    Rare, but not impossible, a fluffy may die of a broken heart under very specific conditions and is not guaranteed to be replicated. Death by heartbreak is ten times more likely to happen to a foal in the same circumstances. If a foal is washed, fed, kept warm and looked after in every regard, yet never once held, it has a 40% chance to die via broken heart.

  1. Enfie bebbeh and runt scent:
    All fluffies, but mares specifically, have an incredible sense of smell when sussing out weaknesses in their own kind. A foal that is born with an invisible defect, a tumour, or a genetic abnormality, all have a 45% chance of producing the ‘runt scent’, which naturally is produced to inform adult fluffies that a young fluffy is somehow defective at birth and in need of serious medical attention. Enfie bebbeh scent is 93% likely to be produced when a foal has survived sexual abuse, resulting in the glands that produce the runt scent pheromones to aggressively overcharge from the intense trauma and break, causing the scent to never go away. Fluffies with both versions of the runt scent will grow up ostracised, hated and feared by their own kind, often resulting in the absence of an ego, self worth or a positive outlook on life.

  1. “dat nu am toysie!”:
    Fluffies are preprogrammed to feel intense fear, anxiety and stress when in the vicinity of guns. This was put into effect by Hasbio as a method in which to help children not play with their parents guns. An unfortunate side effect of this rather buggy neurological code is that fluffies can not distinguish between a gun, a squirt gun, a nerf gun or even a gun shaped stick. Regardless of whether or not the gun is real, the fluffy will go into an intense state of fight or flight, inform the holder of the object that it isn’t a toy, and kindly and firmly (yet fearfully) request that they put it away.

  1. Ferals make do:
    Domestic fluffies tend to have a much higher standard for what amount of filth is acceptable to maintain a quality standard of living. If a domestic foal has feces on their rear end, they will beg for cleaning and their mother will provide after every bowel or bladder movement, while a feral foal will only make such a request after their fluff has begun to matt and cake with dried feces.

  1. Gen 2 fuzzies:
    After the infamous fall of Cleveland, all generation 1 fuzzies were rounded up and eliminated. A eastern European biolab purchase the rights and reworked fuzzies into a brilliant form of fluffy pest control, where the client would hire the company to deploy a small herd of them in a fluffy populated area for guaranteed extermination.

Notable Gen 2 traits:

Gen 2 fuzzies run their herd in a hive structure, where every stallion is a son to the matriarch.

Although Gen 2 fuzzies are more genetically related to xxls than they are to actual fluffies, a female fuzzy can collect the sperm of a fluffy stallion and repurpose it into creating more fuzzy foals, discarding the majority of the doner’s genetic materials and resulting in 100% pure fuzzy offspring.

All fuzzy females are born with savvy fluffy disorder (SFD), which causes them to have a higher intelligence like a smarty and exhibit all of the primary traits that the three lower male castes carry.

Savvies are always born with the albino mutation, resulting in even whiter fluff and ruby red irises, as opposed to the duller white fluff and ice blue eyes of the males.

Fuzzy castes:

Savvy: much like a smarty and acts as the matriarch, leader and mother of the herd. There are only two in a herd at any given time. One to lead, and one other to replace her when she dies.

Seeker: much like a finder, they are dedicated to the swift act of hunting fluffies and lowering them into organized traps and to also seek food for the herd. They serve as a worker drone for the herd.

brute: much like a toughy, brutes are exceptionally large and strong, serving as both the savvy’s guard and a soldier in the hive structure.

Infiltrator: the infiltrator is the third basic caste and unlike the others that exhibit little to no personality, infiltrators can expertly mimic fluffy behavior down to the t. Main purpose of infiltrators is to gain access into herds and tear them down from within. And in an instance in which there are no longer fluffies in the vicinity, infiltrators will turn their attention towards human homes and attempt to infiltrate the domicile and then kill whatever domestic fluffies are in its sight.


As I create more head-canon I will add to this topic.

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Wondering about MEDTEL’s competing products, did they try to make Popples real?
Or Boglins?

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I love your head cannon. I love the censorship and how all the fluffies despiser human love and approval.

I just imagine a smarty being like “Dummeh Daddy smarty knew dat… oh Daddy is su smawt he am de bestest”

And a cannibal would be like “Did Kiwwer du a guud job at numming all da bad Fluffies? Please say yus daddeh”

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They tried a living, pocket sized hello kitty range called MeowPals but it didn’t get beyond the test phase and was put on indefinite hold after their competitor had the infamous Cleveland escape incident.

There are rumours however that the test batch was dumped in the welsh countryside but no evidence beyond a handful of blurry pictures and a few dead and gnawed on feral fluffies in the fields have shed light on it.

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I would say around 60% of Smarties would abandon their herd in an instant if a human offered to adopt him but only him.

As much as these creatures desire independence, their programmed nature is the very core of what they are and they can’t deny what they need more than anything is the love and approval of a human being. That’s why human betrayal cuts fluffies so deeply.

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They also tried to create a direct knock off competitor to fluffies using the likeness of Spirit from the dreamworks motion picture, but that was immediately cancelled very early in development as they instead opted to buy HASBIO outright and take the fluffy brand for themselves.

That would mean breaking/curing a smarty would just have to involve. Loving bombing and brainwashing

“Smarty you are breaking Daddeh heart by being a bad fluffy, Daddeh only loves Good fluffies, Only fluffies who behave and can be trusted get to sleep in Daddeh beds and be in his fluff pile.”

I feel like these phrases could make a smarty fall into some mental turmoil and mentally fight their inner smarty. This well then cause three things to happen (complete cure and hyper obedience, derping by the mental stress but becoming docile and or completely mental breaking and going insane but not into the wanna die loop)

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Smarty syndrome is a personality disorder such as Antisocial Personality Disorder (aka psychopathy). So unfortunately there is no cure so smarties have something of a psychological dilemma that results in intense amounts stress and conflicting mindsets.

That being said, like with human ASD, smarty syndrome could be managed and minimised greatly with medication and therapy, but no medication has been invented or therapy developed due to fluffies being so easily replaceable and humans having better things to do with their time and money.

It makes the situation a little more tragic, in a way.

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That’s sad. But I really liked my little idea, maybe I’ll use it for my fluffy idea. I just loved the idea of a smarty breaking and becoming so loyal.

But maybe giving even very small doses of ASD medication could help smarty fluffies, and there’s also BMS. But that mostly occurs when a mare has goals at a young age and there dose appear to be a cute as shown in many stories. It just requires a lot of brainwashing, psychological or physical abuse.

But maybe normal therapy can help them too as BMS dose appear to be a personality disorder.

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I imagine in an entirely hugbox based universe there would definitely be fully working treatments for those conditions, unfortunately humans barely care enough about each other’s mental health so the wellbeing of fluffies is even more neglected by comparison.

After all, you can throw a smarty over an overpass for acting up and so long as you don’t hit someone’s windshield on the way down, you’ve committed no crime.

It’s the underlying tragedy of the situation that I find so fascinating. That’s why I always write Smarties as having very bombastic and extreme personalities, especially in the Poopie smarty story. With the exception of Poopie himself, who actually doesn’t have smarty syndrome, just an intense desire to be something above his own station in life.

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Wow that’s intense. I like to see smarty syndrome as a personality disorder too and separate to but actually intelligent fluffies.

In the general fluffy universe I do like to imagine there are at least some people out there study fluffy psychology. Like we do with animals in the real world.

Also smarty fluffies still desiring love and human approval is supper sweet and yet sad. As their brass personality and stubborn attitude makes them at a higher risk of being killed as foals or adults.

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Oh yeah, and since the world of fluffies is one of money and business as far as most humans are concerned, like all businesses they will take whatever is the cheapest and most effective road to profit. Like how in my Coffee series, nurse mares are trained specifically to sniff out personality disorders and disabilities so those undesirable and unprofitable foals can be slaughtered.

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Yup pretty sad.

But changing the topic I personally love good-smarty who actually know how to lead a heard or truly love their human owner. These smarty give a unique insight in fluffy ownership as their more independent personality makes them similar to certain cats and dog breeds.

They KNOW that poppies go in the liter box and if they behave they get treats or spaghetti. And when they actually listen to their human (who they see as the most important thing ever) it’s so sweet.

Also I like the idea that all Fluffies see humans as perfect and beautiful beings. I like to imagine that they can’t see a scare on a face or they can’t see a “bad hair day” or “disheveled look” and all the humans they see are always dress in formal attire and look unrealistic beautiful. But when they go into the “wanna die” loop they see the real world and can’t comprehend it, also I like to imagine that when they are being abused they see small glimpse of the real world.

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Yeah, that’s exactly how I imagined it as well, the wizard of Oz’s red curtain pulls back and reveals all the magic to be a lie. I think the smart fluffies and even some smarties are more resilient to that but nevertheless they still want what all fluffies want and it has the capacity to destroy them all the same, it just might take a little bit more of a push.

That’s why I think fluffies can’t handle human on human violence, it would be less like lifting the curtain and more like ripping it down while it’s on fire.

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For me in my opinion, smarty and intelligent fluffies do see the world and humans as beautiful. But they are smart enough to navigate through it, if they see a dead fluffy it will appear to be asleep or if they see flies it will be glowing pretty bugs. Just like for any other fluffy but they aren’t completely fooled, they understand that the beautiful humans can be bad or that the magical creatures that carry humans are dangerous.
I also do like the idea that they can’t handle human violence or pain. It’s bitter sweet

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The idea of human death would probably absolutely throw them through a loop. I read this incredible comic about a little girl who dies of cancer and her fluffy can’t move on, so it just stays in her bed all day because it smells like her and cries until eventually her parents get sick of it and throw it out.

I think for a fluffy to consider actual human death and especially to witness it would be like a human witnessing God fall to a stone fired from a sling.

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That story is so sad and also it was the DAD who was the asshole just saying.

Also yeah fluffies seeing a human get hurt or die or hearing that one passed away. I imagine they feel completely dread if they saw a human get hurt, but if they saw one die then they break mentally but if they hear that one passed they become depressed and but move on as they’ll think they are just sleeping forever.

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I wonder what a smarty would truly think if it’s owner passed away in front of it. What kind of emotional trauma that would cause? Would it cause the smarty to fall deeper into its persona to cope or would it be just enough trauma to absolutely cripple that fragile ego?

I’ll probably write a one off about that.

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That would be very interesting to look into. On one hand, they fall deeper into the smarty persona and probably act out to get “forever sleepies” to be with their owner. Or on the other hand they completely break down and just lay there.

Also I have my own idea of SBS. I like to imagine that in their head like regular foals they talk to themselves and understand they need milk, food, love and hugs. But like an ordinary foal they can’t understand it like an adult fluffy would.

I also like to imagine that like real animals with “SBS” they can have children too and evil breeders abuse these fluffies if they have unique, exotic or rare colored patterns and traits etc.

I know it’s evil but people do it in real life with inbreeding animals like tigers to makes them white.

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I actually have a different opinion on SBS, I think they live in their own little world of milk and mummah songs to cope with the constant state of emotional fear they’re in. I believe that they can’t grasp the world even on the level that are fluffy can AND they are one of the only fluffy types that have the opposite of what I like to call “the rainbow filter”, that makes even the most bleak parts of life seem colorful and pretty.

I imagine the SBS fluffies having such a limited grasp and seeing the world for what it truly is, or maybe even through a more intense and confusing filter, puts them into a state of semi-catatonic shock, with the only thing that can ease their simple minds is the first piece of warm and comfort they ever experience.

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