Your name is Poopie and you are in danger of (and on the run from) a herd led by a big, fatty, meanie, pinkie mare who wants to give you the wowstest speshew pwace huwties and foweva sweepies.
you woke up under a tree in the park, carried bravely by your new tuffie called Dummeh, who is currently off to find you the bestest nummies. your thinkie-pwace has huwties like a mother-enfer and your see-pwace is still swollen shut. but that doesnt matter right now. what matters is becoming a smarty and to do that you’re going to need more than just one tuffie.
“wai…?” you thought allowed, “wat ewse du smawty hab?” you pondered. then your mind raced back to the black one with the white mane… “she gun be speshew fwend wen owder” his voice echoed in your mind… then a second memory popped into your thinkie-pwace… “speshew fwend? Whewe am poopie bebbeh?” you remember the old and grey smarty saying. It hit you like a lightning storm. “Poopie kno noaw! Poopie nee speshew fwend!” you exclaimed to the heavens. as you shot up and ran around the park. there were lots of pwetty fluffies there with funny neck thingies and a little shiny dangling on them. surely one of these would want you.
you tried your luck but all of them just said meanie wowdsies at you, others would have you be chased off by their speshew fwend, how were you supposed to know they already had one? And one mare just kept staring at the bwite baww in the sky and said some silly things about how “pwetty” the baw is and how badly she wished she could be “as pwetty as da big sky baw. wike a wubing daddeh keepin himb see-pwaces ober us aww”. she made you feel very uncomfortable, so you had decided that it might be a good idea to trot along.
“HEWWOOO AM POOPIE, WAN BE SPESHEW FWEND?!” you excitedly screamed into the face of an all white pointy headed mare. “da enf did Poopie jus saysie tu Misty? Poopie tink dat Misty wuwd eba towch yew? gu way befow Misty mayk sicky wawa fwom wookin at Poopie!”
your mammah used to say faaarrrr worse than that, so it didn’t hurt too much, maybe she just needed some love to stop being such a big meanie.
you coo’d as you rubbed your blood stained face against hers. she was soft and so clean, her smell was like sweety fwuity nummies and her warmth was like the light from the bwite sky baw . “oh poopies, am noaw mayk head tawkies wike cwazy mawe” you thought to yourself. that was until you felt yourself hurdling through the air, the pain hadn’t even registered until after you landed in a patch of tall gwassies.
“GET YOUR MANKY FERAL ASS OFF MY SHOWFLUFFY, YOU LITTLE SHITRAT!” her hoomin mummah screamed at you.
you got up and tried to explain yourself but before you could say your first wowdsie you kept getting hit with a thick, grey, rolled up piece of paper. as she smacked you about all that came out was a soft. “HuuuHuuuuHuuuuuu… am gud fwuffy, p-pwease nu huwties!” like an involuntary tick. then the mean lady grabbed you by your neckie and threw you into the big yellow twashie can with a fluffy picture on it… you really wished she hadn’t.
inside the teashie can you saw fluffies… lots and lots of fluffies, and all of them were foweva sweepies. some were whole but most of them were missing pieces. you sat and cried, you knew this was the end. how were you going to escape? could you escape? you were SO CLOSE, you couldn’t die now, YOU ABSOLUTLEY REFUSED.
you started stacking bodies. pushed them around, a few weggies here, a half eaten soon-mummah there and BOOM, you had a staircase. all you needed was one more stair… but you were fresh out of bodies, you stacked them all and all the poopie baggies under them were unfortunately too squishy to use.
then your ears perked up, you weren’t alone in this twashie can… under the poopies bags was a muffled “HuuuHuuuu”-ing. you moved a few around and there she was. a mare, yellow fluff, a yellow-orange-ish mane, with a peetty pointie on her thinkie-pwace, laying on her backsie. you reached down, her yellow reminded you of your bother, you couldn’t help but to touch her.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKK!” she screamed as she kicked you in the face, making your mouthie bleed all over again. “NU HEWT MUNSTAH!” she screeched before sobbing into her hoofies.
“owies, cawful dummeh mawe, Poopie am onwy twin to fin a speshew fwen” you explaind while rubbing your snout.
“NUUUUUUUUUU PWEASE NU BAD SPESHEW HUGGIES, NU MOWE, NU AGAYN!” she blubbered before hyperventilating like the grey smarty did before his foweva sweepies. you were so scared that she’d do the same right now and it’d be all your fault… for reals this time.
“nunununu am gud fwuffy, am cawwed Poopie bu wan be smawty an-” you were about to expain before another ear pearcing “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKK!”
“NUUUUU Smawties gib da wowstest bad enfies!” she whined as she curled up into ball, being sure to cover both her speshew pwace and her poopie pwace with her weggies and tail.
“nu dat nu twue, Poopie nu wan enf yew… dat nu twue eber, Poopie wuwd wike tu enf yew bu yew nu wan, su Poopie jus gun saysie gu-bye” you sighed before turning around and climbing the rotten starcase to freedom.
“yew nu gon gib… b-bad enfies?” she asked as if you were a liar.
“Nu, noaw shuddup, am twin’ tu du an escapies” you said, your mind on not ending up like the components of your makeshift staircase. but no matter how hard you tried you were just shy of climbing over… you needed another fluffy.
“yew wan hewp?” the yellow pointy mare said as she waddled towards the foot of the stairs.
“dat wowd be gu-” you said as you turned… then you saw it… wingies AND a pointy? your brain had went into overdrive, you knew that there was only three kinds of fluffy, earthies like yourself, pointies like the black smarty and wingies like your brother… but as your eyes locked onto her, you raced through your own mind for a discriptor, anything, something… you always knew what words were and what they meant from the day you first opened your see-pwaces, but you had no word for this… and that terrified you.
“M-M-MUNSTAH!!!” you screamed, you didn’t mean to, it just sort of came out in an explosion of fear. you fell down the fluff stairs and landed right by her hoofsies. “PWEASE NU NUM POOPIE, POOPIE NU TASTE PWETTY!” you screamed.
somehow she looked more scared of you than you did of her.
“nu wan num Poopie… wike Poopie nu wan gib bad enfies tu munstah…” she whimpered.
you felt terrible, looking up at her, you judged her as quickly as she did you. maybe you were both wrong.
“o-otey” you said with a gulp. “ib Poopie nu be scawed ob Munstah, den Munstah nu be scawed ob Poopie, deaw?” you asked before spitting on your hoofsie and pointing it at her. she looked a bit disgusted, not at you but the spit.
“dat am duwty” she said.
“Munstah am sayin dis insidies ob twashie can fuww ob foweba sweepies fwuffies…” you said with a face made of both confusion and annoyance.
“otey, den. mayks sensies tu Munstah” she said before lightly licking her hoof and tapping it against yours.
she then stood herself at the top of your decaying and half collapsed pyramid and got low for you to mount over her. and with one quick kick you were on the other side, hanging out by your front hoofsies and looking into the pit of technicolored death you were on the verge of escaping.
“com wid Poopie!” you said as you looked your new friend in her eyes.
“nu, Munstah am twashies, dat wy owd hewd an smawty put Munstah hewe”.
“weww… Poopie saw pwenty ob Poopies in dewe, du Munstah tink dat Poopie am twashie?” you replied.
“nu, bu du hab twashie namsie dowe” she said with the ever so slight hint of a giggle on the end.
“dat twue, bu am gon fixie dat. an eben ib Poopie am awways twashie, an Munsta mawe am awways twashie… den it am nu su bad ib Poopie an Munstah be twashie fwends tugeva?” you asked in earnist. you had never actually told another fluffy how you felt deep inside until now, but with Munstah it felt… right. maybe it was her yellow fluff or her smile, or just that she caught you on an off day… well a more off-than-usual day.
“otay…” she said quietly as she took your hoofsie and you both fell out together, landing on a black twashie baggy and taking off back into the park.
you sat together and shared grassy nummies for a while until your tuffie came back with the good stuff.
“Dummeh bwing dees!” he said as he dropped a bunch of apples from the plastic bag he was carrying in his mouthie.
“ooooooooo” Munstah said in aww before numming one straight away.
“whewe yew fin dem?” you asked the behemoth.
“stowe id fwom wady on ober end ob da pawk” he said confidently before noticing the mare. “whu am dat?” he asked.
“dat am twashie fwend, namsie am Munstah, bu Munstah nu wike namsie, su am twashie fwend” you explained.
“yu meanies an speshew fwend?” he prodded further with his great big unibrow raised in genuine confusion.
“nu, Poopie fin hew in twashies an am fwend, su am twashie fwend” you clarified.
“mayks sensie, Dummeh gues…” he said before plopping his butt down and numming an apple of his own. that was until behind him you saw two familiar shapes run at you. one big ball of white with a golden neck dangly and hoomin with a big grey piece of paper held over her head.
“THAT FAT LITTLE SHIT STOLE YOUR APPLES! GET EM, GIRL” the hoomin lady commanded.
“oh poopies…” you coughed out with a mouth full of half chewed apple. and quickly at your order, your twashie fwend and tuffie both followed as you scampered off for your little lives.
you ran and ran until you got to a hole in the metal fencie of the park, standing there was an orange fluffy with a black mane. she told you to “fowwow in hewe” and you did just that, well… except for Dummeh, he was just too big. so all three of you pulled and pulled but he was just shy of being free. you panicked as you saw the lady and white meanie mare get closer and closer through the bars and then you saw it, the worst thing a stallion could witness, she ran right into Dummeh with horn pointie aimed right at his speshew wumps. and then in a sudden burst of pain fueled adrenaline he shot out the rest of the way with the loudest “SCREEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeee” you had ever heared.
All three of you chased after him as he left a steady trail of booboo wawa and sowwy poopies in his wake.
Eventually you calmed him down as he chirped underneath a bench, you noticed your new friend staring at Dummehs torn up speshew pwace.
“su much… Boo boo wawa.” she said with a… smile?
“Yus, yew kno hoew hewp himb?” you begged, the worry noticeable in your shakey voice.
“hehehe fwuffy knosie… Fowwow…” she said as she took off, almost skipping with excitement.
-to be continued-
