Note: this is part of the We Am Venom! series, and takes place around the same time as “Luminary”.
On a balmy evening in San Francisco, Venom the symbiotic fluffy swings from building to building on black webs, an intense look on their face.
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The Klyntar speaks up in Tom’s mind.
“Do you think we’re missing anything good at that festival Cal mentioned?”
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And Tom replies out loud.
“Pwob-ab-wee nu.”
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“Ha! Yeah, we’ve got more important shit to worry about here. Fluffies to protect, abusers to eat, and of course, Carnage is still out there somewhere.”
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“Cawnage mite nu be in San Fwan-sis-koh aneenowe.”
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“If that’s the case, it might be time for US to hit the road too. I mean, we’re actually running out of abusers to eat in San Fran.”
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“We gutta deaw wif Cawnage fiwst, foh.”
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“He can’t be far. Even if he’s not in San Francisco, he’s probably still in California. And you know why he’d want to stay close.”
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“Cuz WE am hewe.”
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“Precisely. It’s us Carnage wants dead the most.”
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“He gut see-wee-yus daddeh ish-yoos.”
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“Haha! He does! But my point is, if it’s us he wants, he won’t leave the state unless WE do.”
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“But if we am gon, how am he gunna KNU dat we am gon? Du Kwin-taw haf sum kinna… uh…”
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“Connection? Well, that’s a LONG story. Believe me, if I could tell you where Carnage is, I WOULD. The sooner he’s not attacking fluffies anymore, the better.”
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“Mistah Caw sed dat if we knoo Cawnage weaw namesie, da Kay-oh-tiks cud find him in wike, fibe smaww fowebas.”
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“Sadly, we didn’t really get a chance to sit down and chat with him in our last encounter. I don’t think he knows OUR secret identity either, so even-steven.”
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Venom is silent for a few seconds, still swinging.
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“…Hu am Steben?”
The Klyntar sighs in Tom’s head.
“It’s just a figure of speech, buddy.”
Meanwhile, Michelle Howard, attorney at law, sits in her office, browsing the internet on her computer.
And not having much success finding the information she needs.
“Goddamnit! Google has failed me again!”
She frantically types on her keyboard.
“Why is it so hard to find out what those fucking Klyntar are weak to?!? I need some way to defend myself if the shitrat comes back…”
She glances at the window, seeing Venom swing past the building.
They make a point of doing that on a regular basis, as a coded reminder to Michelle that they have a deal.
She doesn’t fuck with them, they don’t fuck with her.
Then Michelle hears her phone vibrate, and sees that an unknown number is calling her.
She quickly answers.
“Who is this and how did you get this number?”
The person on the other end replies, their voice sounding masculine, deep and calm, with an accent Michelle can’t place.
“I am… a friend, Michelle Howard. As for how I got your number, I have my ways, don’t worry about it. On to business: I am aware of the unusual problem which you have been dealing with. A former pet of yours, bonded to a filthy Klyntar. I am not a fan of the Klyntar, nor have I ever been. I believe that we can assist each other, Ms. Howard.”
“I think I see what you’re getting at. But what do you want from me? Money? Legal services?”
“I want for neither of those, Ms. Howard. It is something else I desire from you.”
“If this is a proposition, I’m hanging up. …You sound too old for my tastes, anyway.”
“You’d be surprised to hear how old I am, but no, this is not an attempt to solicit sexual favors from you. I have a far more… enlightened favor in mind. Or perhaps you could call it a job offer. Really, you don’t have to do that much. Are you aware that your former pet is allied with the ChaotiX?”
“I try not to think about it. I don’t want fucking Korkea showing up in my office next. A cease and desist letter won’t mean jack shit to him.”
“I completely understand. I’ve found myself feeling rather disappointed by Calvin Korkea as of late. Hopefully, you won’t disappoint me, and you’ll choose differently from him.”
“What do you mean?”
For a few seconds, the mystery man on the other end is silent.
“Ms. Howard… have you ever heard of an organization called the Peacemakers?”
Venom lands in an alleyway, and after quickly checking that no one is watching, shifts back to normal form.
As Tom waddles out of the alleyway, making his way to the nearby Faucheuse Foundation branch, the Klyntar speaks up in his mind again.
“It’s been a while since the last Carnage attack, y’know. It feels like the calm before the storm, Tom.”
Tom nods.
“Da bas-tuwd am up tu sumfin big.”
Having reached the Faucheuse Foundation, he heads inside, greeting the employee behind the counter.
“Hewwo, mistah Jess-ee. Tom am jus hewe tu caww mistah Caw.”
“Oh, sure. Go right ahead. Just holler if you need anything.”
With that, Tom waddles into a hallway, Jesse opening the door for him.
If you’ve forgotten, Tom, who the Foundation only knows as one of Calvin’s informants, has his own saferoom here, designed to accommodate his specific needs.
It has a balcony with a fluffy flap, so he doesn’t have to go in through the front door, but he just felt like it this time.
It has its own phone, and phones for fluffies are becoming more and more popular.
He’s under no obligation to use the saferoom, and is free to come and go as he pleases. If he needs to call Calvin, or just wants to take shelter during harsh weather, he can do so.
And he appreciates the effort they’ve gone to for him.
The Klyntar speaks up, sounding worried.
“We won’t be able to beat Carnage with just the TWO of us this time, so it’s a good thing we’ve got friends willing to help us. I don’t think he’ll let us lure him to another church.”
“Dewe am awways buwnies.”
“Okay, yeah, but fire’s got a higher chance of backfiring on us, no pun intended.”
“But Bewwikose sed dat da week-ness-ess of da Kwin-taw am… wossnamesie.”
“Psychosomatic, Tom. You remember what that means, right?”
“Kinna. It meen dat it aww am in yu head. Dat a Kwin-taw am week tu buwnies cuz dey fink dey am week tu buwnies, wite?”
“That’s about it, Tom. But I can’t lie, it’s hard to SHAKE that belief. The rational part of my mind knows that fire and sonics have no power over me unless I THINK they do, but the instincts honed over countless years still tell me that I should fear the flames above all else.”
Tom reaches an elevator, seeing another employee already waiting for it.
Yes, there are elevators. Did you think that the Foundation buildings only have one floor?
ding
As the elevator doors open, Tom and the employee head inside.
“Can yu push da buttun fow da fiwd fwoow, pwease?”
Tom can’t reach the buttons by himself without exposing his secret identity.
“Of course, Tom.”
As she pushes the button, Tom smiles, his tail wagging.
“Fank yu.”
A minute or two later, Tom reaches his stop.
ding
After waddling out, he continues his conversation with his symbiotic other.
“Tom git it. It am wike if a fwuffy cud bweev in wawas. Da fwuffy knu in dey head dat dey nu gutta be scawedies of wawas nu mowe, but da fwuffy awso knu in dey heawt dat wawas am bad fow fwuffies.”
“See, you really do understand. Is it just me, or do Klyntar and fluffies have a lot in common?”
“Huh. Dey kinna du. But uh… Cawnage nu knu dat da week-ness-ess am sai-koh-sumfin, du he?”
“I don’t think he DOES, Tom. Sucks to be HIM.”
Meanwhile, in Oakland, a police car pulls up outside a drug den, two cops inside.
Or rather, a building that used to be a drug den. The lights are off, and most of the windows are broken and boarded up.
Strangely, whoever boarded all of those windows doesn’t seem to have used any nails.
It is almost as if the boards were glued on.
The building has been seemingly abandoned for a while, but there’s been reports of unusual noises and a number of missings persons cases around here, the police could only make excuses to avoid this terrible neighborhood for so long, and someone had to draw the short straw.
They’re not going to like what they find.
But what they find will like them, in the way that Hannibal Lecter likes meeting new people.
Having parked on the side of the road, the cops exit their car, cautiously creeping up to the front door, which is ajar.
“OPD! Anyone in there?”
“Come out with your hands up!”
There is no answer, so the cops draw their pistols, heading inside, delving into the darkness.
There is someone inside the building, a lot of someones, as the cops are about to learn the hard way.
But the… tenants don’t have any hands to put up.
WHUMP
Three steps in, the cops trip over something that looks like a slimy red tripwire, dropping their guns.
click
And then something else red and slimy closes the door behind them.
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Before they can grab their guns, something equally red and slimy pulls the pistols away, further into the dark building.
And then they see something fluffy-shaped waddle towards them.
A fluffy covered in red slime, with jagged blank white eyes and sharp yellow teeth.
“Oh, gud-ee. Da bwue-soot hoomins am fine-awwy stikkin dey nosies in Cawnage biz-niz.”
The cops freeze up in sheer terror, and Carnage licks one cop’s cheek with a long, slithery tongue.
“Wewp. Gess da hewd gutta moov again. Oh, but fiwst…”
Carnage’s entire clan arrives, surrounding the cops, licking their lips in anticipation.
And the progenitor of this horrifying herd grins maliciously.
“Fiwst, we gutta put sum fyoow in da tank.”