Blueberrys owner loaded them into the boot of their car ready for another trip to the vet, as usual Blueberry was not appreciative of the fluffy carrier.
And they had a low opinion of the vet themselves, only ever needing to go there to get neutered and for check-ups, their owner tries to reassure blueberry that the vet isn’t a meanie, but it doesn’t seem to get through to him.
If she didn’t know better the pitiful begging from the boot of her car sounded like that of an animal being taken to the slaughterhouse. But she had to keep going.
Once with the vet, they quickly reviewed the fluffycam footage, after giving blueberry a strawberry lollypop to distract them. “Okay so this is fairly common for fluffies, they aren’t known for towering intellect at the best of times, and I think Blueberry here is on the lower end of the spectrum… Can I ask him some questions just to make sure?” Blueberry’s owner gave permission, so the vet sat down looking at the fluffy happily licking away at the lollypop. “Hi Blueberry, I just need to ask you some questions.” before gesturing to their computer screen at a still frame of Blueberry playing just before they squeezed out some chocolate soft serve.
“Otay nice mista vet.” Blueberry responds between licks of their tasty treat.
“I can tell from this video that you knew that you needed to ‘make poopies’”
The vet clicks the mouse, and the video plays a segment where blueberry turns and says to their own rear end “Nu nao meanie poopie pwace, Bwubewwy am pwaying.”
Clicking again to stop the video the vet asks, “Was your ‘poopie place’ telling you that it needed to go to the litterbox?”
“yus nice mista vet, bu’ Bwubewwy was pwaying an Bwubewwy wuv pway an’ wook at fwuff teebee nu wan stop to go tu wittah box for meanie poopie pwace.”
“Hmm… okay, why is your ‘poopie place’ a meanie?”
“Poopie pwace am meanie cos dey make fwuffeh stop pway and gu to wittahbox, ow nu wisten to Bwubewwy when say to wait, den make bad poopies on fwoor”
“Have you considered that you are being a ‘meanie’ to your ‘poopie pwace’ it can’t hold on forever, it needs to go to the litter box, or it will make bad poopies.”
“Why poopie pwace am dummeh?”
“Thats just how it is, your ‘poopie place’ can’t help it, mine can’t, your ‘mummahs’ can’t. By ignoring your ‘poopie place’ you are actually making the bad poopies.”
“Mummah haf poopie pwace? Bu’ nebah see use witta box?” Blueberry asks looking around confused.
“She uses a human litterbox. I need to ask another question now. After you made the ‘bad poopies’ you ate it didn’t you?”
Blueberry looks down embarrased “Yus nice mista vet. Nu wan num poopies bu’ scawed.”
“Did you enjoy the taste of the ‘poopies’?”
“Nuu! Poopies am wowstest nummies!”
“Did you enjoy how eating the poopies made you feel?”
“Wah? Bwubewwy hate numming poopies gif wowstest mouf saddies and tastie pwace huwties.”
“Good good… You said that you ate your ‘poopies’ because you were scared just now, your ‘mummah’ told me that you had a nightmare last night where you were taken back to the shelter she adopted you from, and that they took your legs and your teeth and made you sit in the litter box. That sounds like a very scary dream.”
"Nuu wike scawy dweam, nu wan woose weggies and haf tu sit in poopies wike biggah fwuffeh at shewter.
The vets’ eyes opened wide for a second in realisation “I think I understand now Blueberry, was this bigger fluffy brown? and called Marge?”
Blueberry nodded in the affirmative. “an’ have wots of owwie marks, an’ only one see-pwace.”
“I am going to give you another sweetie because you have been so good.” The vet quickly unwraps another lollypop and gives it to blueberry who giving both a lick looks deep in concentration as they try to decide which of their two identical treats to start on.
the vet turns to Blueberrys owner and says “I think I understand what has happened, you got Blueberry from the Mayfield Fluffy Rescue Shelter right? Well, they took in an abandoned milkbag, Marge, around when Blueberry would have been there, I think he is half remembering her.”
“Okay… Milkbag?”
The vet looks uneasy for a moment, thinking for the right words before explaining "Fluffies are not classed as animals under the law, so they don’t have the same protections against abuse… so illicit fluffy mills attract people who like to abuse fluffies, one thing they do with unproductive breeding mares is to amputate their legs to use them as a milk source for foals.
“Oh how horrible.”
"Mnnh, I won’t pretend to understand the rationale, but either way the shelter took in a milkbag that had been abandoned by one of these fluffy mills, we don’t know how long she was there, but she was barely alive when she was brought in. it took several surgeries to stabilise her and then their mental injuries were found, she was catatonic, a life of never getting to keep or interact with their foals and the abuse they suffered is catastrophic for a fluffies psyche… They were going to humanely euthanise her to put her out of their misery when she was carried past the foal room. hearing and smelling the foals brought her back. It was quickly found that Marge loved nothing more than spending all day in the foal room watching the foals at play and making sure they were behaving and reminding them to go to the litter box and such.
“Well, that’s nice I guess… I still feel sorry for them.”
“Mnnh, its horrible what some people do to fluffies… Thankfully I don’t think there is anything majorly wrong with Blueberry though, beyond being a bit of an idiot, even the best of fluffies don’t have the much impulse control or time keeping so maybe get an alarm to remind him to think about going to the litterbox every so often while you are not home and remind him that he doesn’t need to clean it up after himself if he does have an accident…”
<Unfortunately, this seems really waffly to me, I had written this out a few days ago and I somehow lost it, classic that rewriting something will never recreate how the first one was in your head.>
