4. Herd leader
“…wuv mummah, mummah wuv babbeh…”
Agh, damn it, what’s that noise? A mare? Great, another herd in my yard for me to take care of, fuckers will absolutely regret coming here, yesterday i bought a new frying pan made specifically for fluffy torture and-
No, forget about it, i think it’s time to go and tend those retarded horses for a minimum wage again. To this day working at a FluffyMart gives me mixed feelings, on one hand is great to see the returned fluffies, manually disposing excess stock and taunting the few survivors when throwing bodies, on the other hand, fluffies. Well, beggars can’t be choosers right? Lazed too much in college but i religiously believe it’s not wasted time if i enjoyed it.
Ah, i feel so good, was my bed this soft before?
“WHA?!”
Hold on a second, what the- that’s a giant bowl fluffy there, have i been sleeping there? Jesus, its big, what kind of shitrat is big enough for one to sleep in?
“(gasp) Niu gud babbeh is talkie babbeh nao, mummah hav niu bestest babbeh”
The fuck is she saying about me? She thinks I’m some sort of fluffy or what?
Wait a second.
What happened yesterday?
It was a regular day, attending the foals, cleaning the litterbox, watching the jellenheimer kill the fuckers, help Todd with inventory management.
That’s it, the mythical monstrosity was on our store! I remember the thing turning fluffies into red paste with a weird tentacle, it was awesome. With an absolute desire to share this thing on my social media, i grabbed my phone and…
And…
And my head… saw my back… dropped on the floor… I felt my head leaving my body…
Am i dead? That fucker killed me? Hold on, hold on, push the brakes for a second. That bowl fluffy called me a “babbeh”, does that mean…
Quickly, i try to get a quick glance around me. Trees, grass, scorching sun and a river. Yes, i need that, the reflection, i must know what happened to me!
“Babbeh wuns! Smawty fwend, wook! Niu talkie babbeh wuns su gud su soown’!”
My legs are numb, it’s heavy and sluggish but i need to know. I can notice a few other bowl fluffies near me but i simply ignore them. Each step is more important than watching more and more of those (technically not) animals.
And so i arrive. The water it’s not that clean but i notice it, my reflection.
In place of my great, magnanimous and human face i instead see a pink fluffy face with brown mane.
My mind it’s on overdrive right now, i try to collect all the info i gathered. I am a human goddamnit, simple logic is something i can do, i am not an idiot.
Have i… Have i transformed into a fluffy after being decapitated by that jellenheimer?
…
Ok i guess.
I mean, i will miss being a human but i simply couldn’t handle it anymore.
Working as a store clerk, being yelled each day by my boss, shit neighbors, my father left when i was born, my mother refused to call me because i stole from her bank account and the rest of my family were in other country because we were immigrants.
And me? I hated all of it. All my life. I am predestined to be big, to do great things, in this body? Oh, man, the bar is lower than ever. My only enemies are other dumb fluffies.
Oh yes, i am gonna live to the fullest! To hell with society! Fuck my work! Forget taxes! Make laws eat shit! I am free! I am free!!I AM FREE!!!
“I AM FWEEEE!!!”
“Dummeh fwuffy swpeaks funneh” The smarty said, finally noticing the miraculous new baby running around after just unweaning.
…
…
…
Few days has passed, still no idea what place is this, it’s not like any forest I know of. However, what i know is what place in this small bowl fluffy society i am, a pariah.
Not because of colors, being an alicorn or being a runt but because, of all things, my accent is funny to them.
To be completely honest, when i gained conscience of my glorious self, distracted was one of the few things that happened to me, after all, being reincarnated it’s quite the shock don’t you think? I was in such a big shock that i did not notice the fact that the english speaking fluffies designed by HasBio acquired an accent!
To be honest i had NO idea of that, i knew that with enough lack of english interaction and young age stimulus, new generations of fluffies could learn another language with various degrees of success depending on the language difficulty, limited to a single language in their entire life and forced to imitating a secondary language words like a parrot instead of communicating with it, i knew that about languages but an accent was something i had no idea of.
Or at perhaps i didn’t watch that documentary about fluffy accents? Did you know being a FluffyMart employee gives you a lot of free documentaries on all streaming sites? Hella useful, used a few of the facts there to play with the punching bags in my spare times.
Back to the accents, their pronunciation, apart of being butchered by fluffy nature, had a unique strength in vowels and tempo unlike anything I’ve heard, not British, Aussie or even Scottish. Adding to the injury, even if tried my hardest i could not imitate it. What bullshit.
It was terrible for my position in this group. While it was not enough to murder me or deny me my mother’s milk they were distant to me. My brothers and other young fluffies did not want to play with me or let me join in their fluffballs, constantly rubbing on my face to “not invite funny talkie fluffy” to their groups.
Don’t care, shitheads are like the other kids at my school. And i will answer in the same way i did back then, go eat shit! I am not gonna go crying like a bitch for not having friends, those wastes of space aren’t worth my time, i am better than them. This time however, i am truly tremendously better than them, fuck yes, i have the intelligence of a human, the last thing I want is “play” and “huggies” with that filth.
What have i been doing with my time instead? Using my brain damn it! Plotting to be the new herd leader isn’t easy endeavor with this body!
Currently there’s only 5 bowl fluffies here, 3 mares, the smarty leader and me. Oh, i guess there’s 6 babies besides me but fuck those, they ain’t adding me to their group so i am not gonna add them to my count (but need to keep them in my counts at least so 11). And fuck the smarty too, he hates me the most for speaking different, it’s a matter of time before he tries to kill me knowing how much of a bastard smarties are. Good thing he’s an idiot to not kill me when i was defenseless.
And defenseless i shall remain? Hell no, i am the goddamn greatest i tell you. Taking that smarty out will be a piece of cake. I will kill the smarty and assert my dominance because he dared to insult me!
Hmm… Have i become a smarty?
…Hmm…Nah, i have been like this my entire life. If i was a smarty i would be dead by now, a baby smarty defying an adult smarty at young age is a very common way to get a dead baby smarty. I can hold grudges hidden like the great dude i am, remember?
And for that grudge i will put that idiot in the dirt, how you may ask? Training!
I’ve always wanted to try this, when i was having fun with a stray that dared to touch my front door i think i discovered something useful. In the same way that a fat sensitive fluffy baby can gain weight and become a walking lump of grease, a fluffy can become athletic. Forcing the stray fluffy to hopelessly chase a spaghetti-and-a-stick with cuts on its legs i managed to notice in its dead corpse that his muscles got toned down in a short amount of time, not only in the sense of starvation but also physical effort. This effect is expected in any living mammal but what made it special was the short amount of time and age of the fluffy, because it was fully matured.
So, with simply 1+1 i can understand what i should do. Most people’s fluffy exercise is not that intense, fewer people have forced fluffies to endure actual exercises to build strength and basically none tried it on specimens as young as me. This is a recipe for success, it’s gonna be hard in this body, but my life is on the line, no better drill instructor than Mr. Survival himself. Man, i am THE greatest!
…
…
…
Two things have changed since i started my training: One is the fact that the river is slowly drying up, the flow is becoming thinner by the day and the herd is getting distressed, apparently bowl fluffies really need water nearby to be happy, haha what idiots. For my part i feel a discomfort, like i really need a bath, just a mere hygiene urge but more annoying, I can handle that, stupid fluffies on the other hand are beginning to shit themselves, unfortunately in the literal and figurative way. Dumbasses.
And the other thing that changed? It’s me of course, gahahaha, i feel like a goddamn god! I knew that my idea would work! A foal forcing themselves to work out this hard at this young age following actual workout actually made a difference! I feel lighter and tougher than ever! And i am at full adult size too! The other fluffies didn’t even notice that one funny speaking fluffy going to god knows where would become the biggest one here now, the smarty didn’t notice too! Retard, perhaps you should not let that guy you hate out of your sight this much uh?
Oh god it wasn’t easy but someone like me of course would be capable of keep up with something as simple as that, being a bowl fluffy and lacking sweating made me lose heat a hard endeavor but i simply went to swim to cool off and go back to training. Anything to make that idiotic smarty my bitch. Not in the literal sense though, i am no homo and even less a shitrat fucker.
Uh, i guess not all fluffies from my generation grew up, i think 3 of the other 6 fluffies died by drowning…as a bowl fluffy and other 2 died by getting kidnapped by a bird of prey, making me the only addition of the herd and forcing us into a 6 members herd, guess the bastards could not keep themselves in the shadow uh?. Don’t know, don’t care.
Right, i was drifting my mind again, can’t help it, my mind is full of precious thoughts for this small fluffy body to keep up.
Today the smarty fluffy called the entire herd to a group to discuss the course of action, i am embellishing the reality of course, the shit for brains just started yelling in the middle of our group.
“Smawty hewd gu’ tu’ niu wawas” The leader started yelling.
“Mummah scawed…”
“Bestest fwiend su smawrt!”
“Nee niu nummies!”
Everyone started speaking gibberish, look at those idiots, what good is this reunion for if the smarty will go wherever he pleases. Not giving the dumbass credit but we needed to find water one way or another, unlike me the herd wanted water to keep swimming on it like the bowl fluffies they are, idiots, we need it to drink too, ahhhh they are so simple minded.
Perhaps i can still keep my backstabbing for a while, if everything goes right the smarty would starve in the road and-
“Hewd gu wit smawty! Nee fain niu housies fu enfie mawes and make gud babies!”
“Move dummeh fwuffies! Smawty gu nao!”
The smarty said, while going the opposite way of where we should go.
If we go downriver everything will be even drier than here.
That’s it fucking retard.
Moving myself from the group i directly run to the smarty fluffy to gain momentum and at my destination i aim my front hooves at his body, putting all my body weight in my hooves and adding strength from my firm back legs to impulse me even more at the hit.
With that surprise impact directed at his torso the smarty immediately dropped to the ground and started crying.
Gahahaha! Fluffies are idiots! When i forced the shitrats to fight in my basement they limited themselves to go in the air and let gravity and their weight to do all the work. And in the rarest of cases they would try to kick with their back legs like a horse or bite, damn idiots, they can’t even grasp the very concept of using their entire body!
“Uhuuuuuuu, wai’ funneh babbeh gives sowwy hoofsies, uhuu….”
“Gwahahaha, dumb iwiot, wearn tu faight fiwst!”
“Swarty giv ou’ forevah sweepies, uhu…” The smarty said, still on the ground, perhaps i broke a rib? If so, the bastard may have some balls left.
Not that it would help him against me, gahaha!
After that sorry attempt at a threat i simply block its trachea with my hoof. The loser starts crying even more.
“Whaaa? Giv’ me, da gweatest me sowwy hoofsies and forebah sweepies?” I press his neck more. “Su scawed, su scawerd gahaha!”
“Funneh babbeh nu hurty bestest fwiend!” The mare that gave birth to me pleads, the other members do the same.
“Hmmm…”
“Smawty sowwy…” The smarty said with their last remaining breath.
“Hmmm…”
“Nuh” Kicked his neck even more, not that hard of course, i want the bastard to live as a meat shield and a way of entertainment.
“Nuuuuuu!! Bestest fwiend!!!”
“Gwahahaha! I am niu weader! Yu fowwow AWW i say nao’!”
“Funneh babbeh nao weader, funneh babbeh nao weader, nu hurties smawty fwiend, pwease!”
Similar cries started but i wanted to make fun if the bastard.
“Niu name wiww be ‘Biwch’, yu wike dat’? ‘Biwch’, gahaha!” I order as i release the loser.
“Smawty nu like niu name… dummeh fwuffy…”
“Uh?! Biwch say sometwing?” I reply raising my body when Bitch replied.
“Nuuuuu, Biwch niu name, wike niu name, smawty biwch scawed uhuuu….”
“Gwahahahaha!!!”
Finally, i am the leader of the herd!
Suddenly my memories of my previous life are being changed, the empty space where my name and identity was is being replaced with “Leader”, feels weird.
Neat. I am a leader in both name and rank!
…
…
…
Going upriver is my new goal, the water is becoming more of a necessity each day, finding a stable source is a priority.
Priority that the goddamn shitrats can’t understand.
Need fluffball, no like “nummies”, want play, want swim. Goddamn idiots, just follow my orders retards!
Damn it, can’t you see the river is mostly mud right now and-
Jesus that’s… That’s a crocodile i think… There, in middle of the mud, it’s standing stll, bathing in the sun like the cold blooded reptile he is.
No shit, my eyes ain’t deceiving me. That IS a giant ass crocodile. Now where the fuck i am? Florida perhaps? Not that i knew Florida had this scorching sun and these weird plants but that shit is goddamn dangerous to both a human or fluffy!
“Weader, nee’ wawas tu pway…” A voice interrupted me. It was the only survivor from my generation, since the others died by their idiocy. Man, they are retarded, I don’t even try to hide my smirk, they are pitiful.
Right, i am a herd leader right? Need to keep my cool, be smart, be a cool guy, that sort of stuff.
“Nu, hewd nee tu find rwiver owigin, pway water, oway?” Fuck this is hard.
“Dummeh weader, bestest babbeh wan pway nao, nu listen dummeh funneh weader” Aaaand he started dashing to the mudded river. If you are gonna ignore me either way why ask me.
“Fwuffy!”
The horse stopped, holy shit, he listened to the leader despite being a bestest baby. Now what?
“Wha- dummeh weader?!” It exclaimed, clearly impatient and wanting to play regardless of the goddamn lizard close to him.
If the idiot ain’t gonna listen to me, i should make an example to the rest.
“Fwuffy dai’ if pway, liswen to weader. Nu gu.” I try to be nice y’know? Fluffies aren’t something i am fond of.
“Dummeh funneh weader, pway is saif fo’ bestest babbeh”
Man, the idiot is going directly to the crocodile.
Should i stop him? I mean, i did order him to not to go there like the good leader i am so it’s all his fault.
The dumb fuck is now playing in the mud and doesn’t even notice the crocodile until it moved and it’s directly looking at him face-to-face.
“Niu fwiend? Fwuffie hav nu name but wan pway!”
(Chomp)
“Bestest babbeh!!!” A mare started crying.
“Gwahahaha! Fwuffy didwnt liswen weader and nao’ dwead, forevah sweepies!” I yell as hard as i can to make the rats understand. “Liswen weader or saem happen’ you!”
“Gwahahaha, gwahahaha!” Shit’s too funny, the idiot killed himself, he’s being turned into paste.
Let it be known that i tried. Fuck, fluffies are dumb, that’s what i get for being a good person (once).
“Nu go oe i will huwt yu su much yu wan nevah bown” The mother of that mare is trying to go.
Fuck them, hella funny, but fuck them.
…
…
…
Following the river is simple enough, follow the road and don’t die. Simple.
And these idiots are doing everything in their power to kill themselves.
They are starving. Fucking starving.
We are surrounded by perfectly edible plants near us! Yet they don’t want to eat because “nummie nu taste gud” what the hell?!
Looking at my followers i can notice them becoming thinner day by day. Again, i must help these fluffies from dying or i will lose my meat shields, life around here is already hard, being alone would be even worse.
“Hewd, yu wan sketties?”
“SKETTIES?!” Now i got their attention. Gahaha, they may be feral bowl fluffies but their small head can’t help but to admire that cheap food.
“Nu su fast. Hewd vewy bad, nu listen weader, you iwiots!” Not gonna do it for free after all, i may be their savior but they must listen to me or I’ll die! Uh, i guess they too may die or something.
“Whu-? Gud weader pwease giv sketties nummies.” Bitch started demanding before the rest of the herd.
“Hewd wiww liswen me, weader?”
“Fwuffy be good!”
“Wan sketties!”
“Pwease weader!!”
Look at them, that’s right they must listen to me, i am their leader after all!
“Gwahahahahah! Wook!”
I take a small leaf of a plant i used to eat during my training regime back then, chomped on it and frayed it in the shape of a noodle. Hardly perfect but enough pasta shaped leaves was enough to make the herd scream.
“SKETTIES!?!”
“Gwahaha, liswen! Yu fowwow weader and-”
“Biwch wan’ sketties, wan’ sketties!”
Goddamn idiot rushed first, thus, getting a kick in his face as hard as i could was his appropriate reward.
“Wearn twis, i meik sketties an yu eat dis gween nummie meanwhail”
They cheered in middle of Bitch cries.
I am the fucking greatest! They finally noticed they can eat leaves, the idiots!
Man, it’s tiring babysitting these horses. I can see why fluffies are so unsuccessful in the wild and being only invasive due their fast birth and grow rate, despite being having a relatively long lifespan, capable of communication and teaching future generations and the intelligence of a child, superior to other animals. They are goddamn stupid! They are banal, they can’t cooperate in significant ways, they barely teach and learn at adult ages and are so goddamn innocent. Good thing they have me but geez, they are so stupid.
“Gu nao! We nee wader… nu, uhh…niu wawas! Niu Wawas!”
They cheered again and the journey continues.
…
…
…
Colored spots in middle of all these plants. Weird, is that trash or…
Another feral herd uh? This one is bigger than us, i can count more than 9 and, damn, earthies, just what i wanted.
The documentaries taught me that bowl fluffies interact mostly with other of the same species, why? Because regular feral fluffies, unlike domesticated and strays, are regularly hostile to bowl fluffies, forcing them to join their group and making them akin to poopie colored fluffies in the social standings.
We can’t fight with these numbers. I may be stronger than a regular fluffy but there’s no way in hell i am researching how many i need to take me down.
“Weiwd fawt fwuffies, su ugwy, join hewd or yu get forevah sweepies.”
Not that i care about them.
“Yu niu fwuffy weader, boww fwuffies fowwow yu” I say, not risking it.
“Wha’?” “Wha’?” “Wha’?”
They were speechless, the one fluffy that took the leader title by force is relinquishing it so easily? The same that laughed at the death of the fluffy who didn’t listen, the one that knew always what to do, the one fluffy capable of making sketties? This doesn’t make sense!
“Dummeh funneh weader” Bitch said, what’s he doin’? “Biwch saib hewd, be niu hewd weader!”
He said proudly in its desire to be a leader again, he said that while ignoring the odds.
9 male fluffies ganged up on him. He didn’t even have time to plead for its life, what an idiot, he is getting stomped to death, hmm, i should watch and try to find a way out of that if it happened to me in the meantime…
As quick as Bitch grew balls for the last time, he died. I would say i respected him in its last moments but i would be lying.
“gwahaha…” Must contain my laugh, the poor thing is a mess of flesh, blood, shit, organs and piss after being attacked for that long, but seeing his demise being brought upon himself was hilarious.
“Oda’ fwuffy wan weader tu’?” A green one said, i guess he’s the leader.
“Nu, nu. Yu weader nao’ bu…”
“Bu…?” Responded, preparing to retaliate any hostility.
“Bu… pewhaps yu wan gud feews? Bowl hewd have onwwy mawes nao’”
“Whu?” The sudden comment made him recoil “N-Nu, nee niu housie fiwst for babbeh!” Oh i can see why the guy managed to keep a herd of…uh…11 shitrats in total, knows at least the basics. Nothing compared to what i can do in time obviously, but i can see he isn’t that much of a retard.
“Yu can du whatevah yu wan tu mawes, yu niu weader, they wiswen, if nu laik, yu fowce mawes into enfie!”
“WHA?!”
“Good mawes, mawes wiww giv’ lots of gud feels, aww taim, whenewer yu wan an dei nu du anyding!”
“Good mawes…”
Idiot, fell into trap, i can see the horse salivating.
“Whu, weader? Wai? Wai? Nuuuu”
“Bad weader, wowsesr weader, hatchuuu!”
“Mummah hatchuu, baddest babbeh!!”
Man, even my mother jumped into the hate wagon. Get fucked, literally, i ain’t dying today.
In fact, i am gonna get a bigger herd tonight gahahaha!
…
…
…
Night arrived and the 9 males were tired to death, it was quite the ludicrous listening to these toys go at it this much. Not only the recently captured 3 new bowl enfie friends but also the original 2 earthie mares joined to do the unspeakable.
Apparently the leader liked my suggestion so much he let me join the herd, retards if he wanted me to not betray you, should have named me your leader after meeting!
So, fluffies are heavy sleepers, meaning that at night they are seriously unresponsive to everything happening around them, it’s kinda refreshing for me because i normally was a light sleeper since i was a child.
With that in mind i didn’t sleep until now to kill the bastard. Now with the cover of the darkness and the tiredness of going at it nearly all day i put my plan in action. I take a solid and spiky branch and move stealthily to the “new leader” sleeping place, apparently he must be a smarty too since he prefers to sleep alone with his leaves, like he’s too good for the rest of fluffies, oh how much he will regret that.
He’s in front of me sleeping like a baby, i am gonna enjoy this so much, so much i tell you. Alright, close the distance, hold your breath, check the branch, aim to the face and with all your might…
“SCREEEE-”
“Gwahahaha, taik dat, tu dah eyes!!!” The branch was impaled to his face, he was crying from the shock but it would be foolish to let this chance go, so i kick dirt to his working eye and start pushing him around.
Whoa, this dude is better than Bitch but you will need a thousand more to take me down gahaha!
Despite being blinded the new leader kept struggling, trying to find me and hit me despite its injuries. Eat shit! You can’t touch me! Keep trying, kick the air because you will only be capable to injure the air i breathe!
Other fluffies have woken up and are admiring the fight, enjoy that because i will put this idiot to the ground!
Getting bored of this facade i grab the branch with my mouth and with a final push i pierce it as far as it could, making the new leader body go limp.
It seems their toughies are getting excited after his death so i take the branch off his skull and point it at them while the loser corpse it’s spraying his blood into me.
“Yu twink yu can taik me?! Gu on den fuwckers!”
The mixture of a bloody tool with a fur filled with death, the sudden death of their leader and the taboo of nu nu words was more intimidating than i thought, they didn’t move a step, no one did.
“Ha…”
“Gwahahahahaha, i am niu weader nao, yu wisten, yu dai fow me, nu wisten and forevah sweepies will be the weast of yur cowncerwns! Gwahahahah, i am THE weader!!!”
They nodded in fear. Good, good. I am gonna need more followers for this one because since yesterday before our encounter i noticed our final goal. A dam in the horizon.
…
…
…
The new group had problems integrating, the idiots could not get along with bowl fluffies at the start, the 3 remaining mare fluffies tried to “play” with the new members. Result? One drowned. Me, of course, stepped in as soon as possible to reiterate that said death was his fault for not listening to me and that they should obey me without question (didn’t say anything, but they swallowed that lie whole)
For now the objective is reaching the top of the dam in the horizon, quite the steep road but staying here isn’t for me, i need a better place to rest and live peacefully, and the fluffies need more water or something, don’t care.
Things have been peaceful for now but i am getting more worried of the fauna today, the crocodile we saw last time wasn’t the only one, several were in the mud along the road, thankfully avoided, and the insects i can notice aren’t like anything i saw. Good thing i used my own speech skills to make the fluffies scared to death of spiders and similar, instead of new insect friends they would get forever sleepies biteys, the horses got so scared from what i told them that they got nightmares haha, dumbasses.
So for now, things are simple, follow the river, ignore animals, escape insects, for god’s sake show these idiots that leaves are perfectly edible for us and that a meowing sound is nothing to worry.
Meow? A cat? Here? This is some kind of forest so…aw hell…
It’s looking at us, i can easily notice that animal there, camouflaged with its natural fur but there.
A leopard.
Looking at us, directly i my eyes specifically.
Nope, not doing it.
“Fwuffy, niu fwiend! Wook! Giv huggies! Giv huggies toughie fwiend!”
And that’s someone else will do it for me!
“Niu fwiend su sad! Giv huggies toughie fwiend! Giv’ nao’”
“Whu? Niu fwiend? Weader sure?”
“Yea, gu nao, need poopies, uh, bai bai!”
The one i sent was the biggest toughie in the previous herd, apparently the right hand to the idiot i killed, not that i was worried of him being similar to my size and probably revolting in the future, but a good leader makes sacrifices, some may die but it’s a sacrifice i will make, sooooo…
The big toughie went slowly to the “new friend” while my gang was spectating him, the leopard was watching him approach with a stare that could kill. Good, good, a bit more and…
“Hewd wan sketties?! Fowwow weader! Gweatest weader giv’ sketties” And i jolt to safety, my group follows with doubt afterwards.
“Sketties?” Involuntarily the toughie said, the tension of the leopard slowly watching him approach disappeared. With a quick bite the beast snapped the neck of the meat shield.
The herd already noticed what happened but we were far already.
From my knowledge leopards have a low hunt success rate and tend to be content to save and consume their prey as soon as they catch something decent, that’s why RUN THE FUCK NOW BECAUSE THE FURBALL MAY INCREASE ITS PORTION, AHHHHHHHHHHH
…
…
…
Man that was close, good thing that bastard just ran off with the toughie, well… look at the bright side: the one that could defy me is dead and we are alive! Gahaha, i escaped a leopard, what a fucking survivalist i am!
“Uhuuuuu… bestest fwiend…”
“Scawed of munstah…”
Agh, stop crying already! We are safe already! Hell, we even made a lot of cardio and our goal shortened a lot!
Wait, i could use this.
“Hav’ hewd wook dat toughie fwiend dai? Forevah sweepies? Wight? Dat wai nevah disowbey weader, weader keep yu saif! Gwahahaha!”
“B-Bu’ weader told toughie to giv huggies…”
Shit. He’s right, eh… hm… what should i say? Damn, think, think, right i got it!
“M-Many munstahs hewe, wisten weader, nu gu to giv huggies and wuv tu oda fwiends or be nummies laik toughie!”
They gasp in affirmation, well at least they are gonna be scared of literally anything they approach to. Traumatized but alive, like i need them.
And now, because of this 12 member herd i got i need to think big like the guy i am
How am i gonna survive? As far as i can guess this is African fauna, shit’s lethal to even humans.
Hmm…
How do pathetic, harmless and dumb creatures survive in the wild? We are headless chickens running around!
Hmm…
Chickens… How do they survive in the wild? Or pigeons since they are equally idiotic… Or kakapos, or sloths, or pandas… No, the last ones doesn’t apply to us…
Hmm…
Numbers… Yeah, that’s it! Fluffies have long lifespans and lighting quick birth and grow rate, how could i forget?! With enough bodies to throw i could survive similar encounters! A leopard, crocodile and even lion can only eat so much before getting tired or bored!
Gahahaha! These idiots will be my meat wall! They are gonna shield me as long i am the leader and they are too dumb to realize that!
Dumb enough to not revolt after i killed their leader, if they were smart they would realize I don’t carry a branch to impale others 24/7.
…
…
…
The endless climbing finally ended! Damn straight, we reached the vicinity of that dam we were trying to reach several days ago!
Just in time, the mares are heavily pregnant, so much that they pleaded me to stand still. After a serious convincing and negotiation that included both threats to force an abortion and a through explanation of the threats of standing still in middle of nowhere they understood my intentions and kept going.
The first thing we saw there was a fence, electrified one, it had a warning sign written in english and a language i didn’t understand. Curious. Which African country speaks english? And to a point where even the feral fluffies are speaking it? (Albeit with an accent, the same one that made me the funny talkie baby back then, tsk, idiots…)
Ah, my mind is in the clouds again.
There’s a big ass fence in front of us. Clearly, this isn’t a fence made for fluffies in mind, we can simply walk underneath. It must be something to protect the people working at the dam from the actually threatening animals. Hmm, Africa and dams, i thought they all lived in huts or something…
Hey, dumbass what are you doing?
“Fwuffy nu touchies fewnce-”
“Whu- (ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ)”
Aaand he’s dead, idiot, good thing it wasn’t a pregnant mare but less fluffies in the herd isn’t ideal.
There it lays on the ground, the bravest and most important fluffy in history that saved countless generations with its sacrifice of showing us that an electrified fence is electrified.
“Nuuuuuuuu!!!”
“Hewrd gu nao, fowwow…”
At least we got a permanent safe house for the time being. A fence like this will not only protect the workers there, but us.
…
…
…
Barely any humans here! It’s like they must have the bare minimum on occasions to maintain the dam working and even those are tremendously far from us in the dam itself, not that we care, our prize is the nature around it.
And now, i can finally realize my goals. I limited myself to what i could do because one cannot do everything on the move, but here? Time to shine.
“HEWD, LISWEN OR GET THE WOWSEST GOWDDAMN HURTIES OF YUR GOWDDAMN LAIF!”
They grouped in front of me with absolute silence in fear, just how they should.
“Faiv mawes, west hewe! I need more babbehs!”
The mares quickly nodded, 5 full litters are my biggest bet, we need as much bodies we can.
“Yu, wed fwuffy, yu naim wiww be “Nummer”!”
“Nummer naim nao? Nu laik, wai…”
“Yu eat aww nummies fiwst!”
“Wha? Dank yu! Bestest weader!”
We are gonna need someone to sample everything around here, i know what leaves to eat but it was by mere luck and guessing, someone taking the bullet for us will increase our menu.
“Yu!”
“Weader?”
“Yu searchies fow nummies and oda’ thingies! Yu niu naim wiww be Wapdog! Nu eat nummies, those fow Nummer, nu gu to gweet niu…uh…fwiends and wun to teww me ewerithing!”
“Nu kno wha naim mean’ bu’ happe fow niu’ naim!”
“Sowmetaims i wiww hewlp yu, i wiww teww yu’ haow lawter”
Lapdog nodded too, more info around us is valuable, doubt he will find important stuff but he needs to try at least.
Now that leaves me with 3 male fluffies, their deaths won’t be missed and thus.
“Yu thwee, yu fowwow nao. Odah fwuffies stway.”
The small trio started following me.
“Wisten.” I said while walking. “I wiww giv yu a spowt fow each uan! Yu wiww stway and wook any munstah neaw, if yu swee any munstahs just wun and sweam! If yu swee any fwuffy wun just wun and sweam too! Nao, twere’s yur spowts.”
One by one i designated each one a spot, it should cover our vicinities. We have few fluffies and have several blind sports but with more time and members we will get a full blown intelligence network of fluffy alerts around us.
“Wets gu back”
Retuning with the herd i continued my orders.
“I wiww teww all of yu when tu pway and eat nummies. Aww fwuffies make poopies faw of us or mustahs smeww and kiww us aww!”
Few pooped a little from my warning. Idiots.
“If bad poopies stiww happen du dis’”
I approached the newborn shit and kicked the ground near it with my hoof, after a while i got a bit of dirt, with that i just kicked it over it.
“When poopies gewt hardy, thwow them faw.”
Abandoning our shelter because of lack of hygiene is ridiculous but i know fluffies are walking shitting machines, hell, even i feel lightly constipated 24/7, expecting them to follow my order to shit elsewhere is impossible, that’s why at least they can cover it with dirt and roll it to another place afterwards.
“Weader will awso wook for wawas spowts fow no drownsies!!”
The last thing we need is to lose a member for not knowing how to drink properly. Keep in mind that only we have 4 bowl fluffies with a certain degree of survivability in water, the rest are regular fluffies and the only reason why they haven’t drowned yet is because the river was mostly mud and small drinking pools literally impossible to drown on even as a fluffy…perhaps.
“Tu mawny things bad weader says, ean’ pway and huggies, nu’ du wha weader says…”
“Yu weader then”
“Wha-”
“Yu weader, go and fwind wawa spowts fo’ hewd, we want to dwink. Gu on, fiwn nao”
“F-Fwuffy weader? B-But if weader, i wan’ pway and-”
“FWIND WAWA SPOWT NAO’ WEADER!”
“W-Weader gu, weader gu”
The moron simply went to the river. That’s it, just approached the river literally next to us.
“Wawa fo’ hewd nao”
The group was perplexed, that’s it? Was it so easy to find water to drink?
“Weader dwink fiwst.”
“W-weader wiww d-dwink, am’ gud’ weader…”
The earth fluffy simply tried to drink and fell into the river.
“Whaaaa? Weader nu’ kno’ fiwnd thin spowts wiwth cwose gwound levewl fow earthy fwuffy? Whaa?”
“(Gulp) Weader!!! (Gulp) Hewlp!”
“Yu niu weader nao””
“(Gulp)”
The herd was crying and scared at seeing the newly appointed leader drowning but I need to save him, pretend too much effort and the rest will take me even more seriously.
I bite his neck more furiously than i should and with a definitive pull, bring the moron back to the ground. In the end the bastard lost a few hairs, is bleeding from the bite and scared to death.
Since I am a bowl fluffy i wanted to search suitable spots with a sediment underwater high enough to prevent drowning and unnecessary deaths. Plus, i knew to swim as a human and would not instantly panic, hell, even if my body sinked i could try to get out since i would try the method of throwing a rock first, then my leg slowly while tied up with some of the several rope leaves lying around here and confirm how safe it is for the rest. Repeat until perfect spot and call herd. Process i should repeat from day to day since the river may move the underwater safety due strong enough currents. Too bad the new leader plan was simply drink.
“Me weader nao’?”
“W-weader nao’…”
…
…
…
It was hard training these blockheads to actually follow my instructions but even a rock can learn something with enough yelling, threats and muscle memory after so many days in a row. Lots of failings here and there but i miraculously managed to keep them alive. For now.
What else happened? Right, Nummer got a stomachache and nearly died but got back up like god’s providence, Jesus i never heard of a fluffy NOT dying from a small internal pain, took a bit of my own day hours to fill his role but instead of trying everything i could put my mouth on first i simply assigned the already known safe food, the herd was equally pleased with me as with Nummer literally putting his life on the line. Kind of a low blow even for me, good thing Nummer was vomiting all around instead of sulking on being ignored for such sacrifice… But i kinda wish to know what would happen, heh.
The place isn’t safe enough so improving it was a priority. The first thing i made was actually camouflaging this multi colored herd in a dangerous forest. For that i ordered the mares and with myself as the construction lead we went to slowly dig holes with perfectly placed leaves near it for us to hide into, the project spanned across several days, the result was crude and the holes were not that deep but it was big enough for us to actually get into in case of an emergency. Hear something, get in hole, put leaves on top, easy. Oh, we also dug a few holes near the 3 fluffies outposts to hide in quick succession. Nowadays all the fluffies around here have their own personal hiding spot, they couldn’t understand at first so i faked a new monster sightings and scared them to death to get into the goddamn holes. They learned, likely traumatized but learned. After all, running around so slowly with these bright colors was suicide.
As for me? My personal hole on the ground is always near me, unlike the others, i placed a few insect carcasses mixed with dead leaves on it. Simple holes on the ground is far from a perfect safety protocol but a hole with masked scent? It would be my best bet. The others would be eaten first but i would be safer than them if we were discovered.
Also i gave Lapdog a new, better order, the dude mostly went to play and find basically nothing in the forest so a more concrete order was needed, he was going to patrol the electric fence and report any dead animal or insect body to me. Me, of course being the only one using their brain, would go to the location Lapdog marked judge if it was safe to bring it back and carry as much as i can in a big ass leave i found a few days back.
If the death was recent, come back later because can’t face a vulture or an actual bigger threat to us. If the body was death for too long, leave it. If the body was already retrieved, return. If the body was mostly consumed, bite the corpse into chunks and bring it back in pieces. If it was an insect just bring it back if the coast is clear. Quite the process and that’s why i can’t leave Lapdog to do it, just tell me where it is. These balls of fluffs can’t do anything with me, that’s why i must so it myself.
On another hand, babies!
They suck!
We have so many, too many.
16 babies from the 5 mares, good thing i convinced them to get knocked up that day.
I supervised each and every birth. Luckily for me, they wasn’t any simultaneous mare spawning new fluffies so i could attend and treat each litter myself.
The first one gave 6 babies, 2 died at birth and a third died by the mother accidentally stepping on it. Total: 3 babies.
The second one gave 2 healthy babies, a brown and a white one. She immediately decided the white one was her bestest baby so i “borrowed” her newborn, shitted on it outside her line of sight and gave it back. The mother, ignoring the obvious action, was mostly concerned with her “bestest” baby being a literal shit. After cleaning it, it was bestest no more. Total: 5 babies.
The third mare gave 6 whole shitrats! Haha, i knew my herd would grow this much! So, half of them were shit colored and the mother was trying to stomp them because of that. Fuckface, we are ferals! The dimmer colored the better, you shit for brains! So i threatened her.
“Wiwsten tu weader, yu giv dis babbeh wilk or i wiww taik yur weggies away!”
“Wha- w-weggies?! B-bu nee weggies tu run an’ pway…”
These feral mares had no concept of a pillowfluff. So i stopped my actions, reunited the mares and explained to them how i would hurt them if they dared to kill a foal.
I explained the fate of a pillowfluff, how they suffered in agony each day watching other healthy fluffies, how sad their life was being incapable of enjoying anything, each excruciating detail was imprinted in their empty heads and finally, i made them learn the fate of a “wan’ die” victim when no amount of love, hugs, babies and play would ever heal their mental state and their only escape was the sweet release of death from this dark, cruel and brutal world they have been forced to live as a pillowfluff.
Not that i would actually do it. Like, How am i gonna amputate their leg? Biting it off? No thanks, no eating shit horse ever. The most i can do it’s breaking all limbs.
Despite that, they caught the message quickly this time, man, how good of a teacher i have become.
And thus the third mare learned to “love” her babies like the rest, i just need to remind her possible fate if any stomping starts to begin. Total: 11 babies.
The fourth mare lost a single baby and created a sack of money, an alicorn! The mother, of course, even with the threats of being a pillowfluff still tried to kill it and it was up to me to prevent that, we needed numbers.
My knowledge of a certain herd torture session back in the day made me learn that mares are only scared of alicorns during the infant period and they have better relationships once the baby matures, it’s just keeping an eye during that time. I learned it after one mare pleaded me to not remove the wings and horns with my bare hands of her son, even as an adult alicorn said son was, i listened, and used pincers instead.
So, for now keep an eye on that mare, don’t let her kill the lil’ dude for enough days and that’s it! Gahaha, ain’t nothing for me! Total of babies in my great herd? 15 glamorous babies, hell yeah.
The fifth and final mare is, ugh, my mother, she looks at me with hate filled eyes, good, perhaps I would treat her better if she at least invited me to her fluffball when I was a child! Not that i would dirty myself with that but that fact is that she never tried to invite me!
Uh, forgot, so, the fifth mare gave only one fluffy, again? Did i have brothers? Can’t remember, didn’t care for those fuckers always thinking they are better than me…
My mind is in mars again, alright, one, one fluffy is all she created, not a good number but…
Another alicorn? What? What is causing all these alicorns? If i was alive i would have made a good penny with this herd, damn it.
“Uhuuuuu…oda’ munstah babbeh…”
Speaking with her little accent she said she considers me a monster too…Don’t care!
What i DO care is more meat shields. This again, listen leader, take care of baby or get worst fate ever, yadda yadda yadda.
Reluctantly accepted, not that she had any choice in the matter. Total: 16 babies!
So many here, this herd is growing nicely!
Hmm…I am happy.
Yes, i am happy, kinda different from killing strays and ferals in my house back in the day.
Thinking about it, i am very prideful of myself.
Why you ask? Well, when i was a human i definitely enjoyed making the shitrats suffer but it was just a supplement. I wanted to feel powerful, yet, my circumstances forced me to be an underdog for the rest of my life. In making fluffies suffer i felt in control, superior.
And now? I feel tremendously better than simply killing them.
Because my heart opened up and i grew a hugboxer soul? Nope, because the field is even now.
As a human i was always the bigger one, the most dangerous one and the strongest one compared to any fluffy of any kind. But in this body? I was TRULY the greatest person i was determined to be! These fluffies had the same circumstances and chances as me, yet, here i am as the superior fluffy here and not by merit of being born as a human but because i earned it! They have the same body as me and i am still the leader here!
Gahahaha! They are no match for me! They would be dead without me!
I could have been a good leader, being friends with them, perhaps make them live a gratifying life like me, but this feeling, this desire to be the biggest one here is truly exhilarating. In a similar way i could have planned a way to kill them all, to hear the delight of their cries, to make them suffer like i used to, but this feeling of being the best is truly amazing, for that i think i could enjoy my time here.
For the first time in my life i am in control of my own fate, and there is no way in hell for me to abandon it.
…
…
…
I have never been this outrageously tired in both lives, ever! Managing these psycho mares and preventing them murdering the shit colored ones and alicorns was extremely tiring, it reached a point where i was forced to group them all together and mix the babies to prevent the loss of foals, it’s my herd goddamnit, i am not letting these retarded horses to make my herd smaller!
Day after day, i had to check on them, i had to review their performances and constantly remind those mares of my threats, hell, i even had to warn them of the fates of an enfie and litter pals for them to actually stop actively trying to kill the foals, and even that wasn’t enough, we are barely holding here what is going on in their heads to justify losing numbers? Fucking bitches!
The hardest endeavor i ever did i tell you. I couldn’t normally sleep for days! This herd is supposed to make me feel like a god, not a stupid servant. I hated every single second i kept these creatures from killing themselves these days but finally my rewards have been reaped.
The 16 babies are all miraculously alive and are now “talkie babies”! Gahahaha! I knew this was nothing for me!
Hell yeah, with enough time his herd will have unprecedented numbers! A wild herd of around 10 is already considered an extremely rare occurrence that speaks volumes of its luck and survival by itself. Now? I got a whole goddamn 27 subordinates following me!
Well, not that the babies can be much help for now. But it’s something i already planned.
These days, after the babies are starting to speak and few begin to unwean, i always go to their group and start doing something always wanted to try.
Propaganda!
I knew of a customer at FluffyMart that managed their fluffies to think of him as a god. Their minds are so easily manipulated hehe.
Not that i don’t want to be a god but i need concrete actions to get these fluffies to work. And thus, in middle of the babies play, love and hugs i always start telling stories about myself. About what i am capable of, what i did, the fates of the idiots who didn’t listened to me, what my plans were, how to survive around here, THAT BAD MOTHERS WHO DON’T FEED ALL THEIR BABIES WILL GET THE WORST FATE IN EXISTENCE PROVIDED BY MY OWN HOOVES, how good life is working under me and how poorly other wild fluffies are suffering.
They are currently too young to catch all i say but stimulation is the key here, they are like children. More annoying and stupid than a human children but the “teach-at-the-start-or-get-fucked” factor still remains. I also liked speaking how great i am but that’s totally unrelated.
Time will tell how good i am at this propaganda stuff.
Oh, and i finally got a use for the hugboxer treatment of smarties. After so many babies it was expected to get a few idiot smarties who think themselves better than me (luckily only 3), normally i would simply kill them slowly as a human but i have a better plan, after all, killing them would mean my work of keeping them alive in the first place was for nothing.
The alicorn and smarty technique. Basically test and defy the intelligence of the smarty in growing age with a superior intellect, which of course it’s mine gahahaha!
Question and answer, correct and incorrect, all the tests made the smarties feel inferior to me, as they should! With each test the smarties always felt how surpassed they were compared to me, how their supposed “smartiness” that made them better than everyone else was nothing compared to me, they wept and kept saying how unfair it was, too bad for daring being born this way, be glad you are of growing age and it’s still treatable.
The results was 3 babies with garbage self-esteem, always sulking and constantly depressed of being less than anything in existence. Also, not that much of a smarty themselves.
Do i take pleasure in traumatizing 3 babies into total submission and probably scarring their social life for now? No, of course no, pfff, what are you talking about? I was obviously being a good leader putting them in place and watching their sweet tears was a truly, truly, painful experience for me.
I think i am gonna have another test with them today too, I’m bored.
Bestest babies gave me several less problems, they keep thinking they deserve all the milk and food but after all the psychological scars i gave the mares it’s just a matter of time until their standard and equal treatment makes them regular foals again. Bestest babies is a social symptom, not a birth one.
Man i am the greatest! Just more thing.
“Hewd! Come hewe, weader wiww teww yu about gud feews!”
Time to bake the next batch.
…
…
…
It worked, it worked! They worship me! The foals after so many sessions of blatant storytelling see me as their idol!
The small new members are optimistic and loyal, they constantly play at “being leader”, want me to play with them and even try to copy my accent. Can you believe it? Despite being born with the same accent as the other fluffies they constantly try to imitate how i talk, the mares were distressed for that but I don’t give a shit! I am the greatest and they treat me as such!
It was quite the lucky miracle i tell you, keeping so many dumb rats alive at the same time took a few years of my life span but i created a full generation of healthy fluffies loyal and hopefully more disciplined for my goals!
Well, not everyone survived. Nummer finally died by poisoning, one fluffy sentry got kidnapped after not hiding quickly enough from a stray monkey wandering in these woods and Lapdog got electrocuted after trying to take an insect by himself.
But it doesn’t matter for the foals are ready for work! Yeah they are not full adults but they are fully capable of cooperating and communicating while following simple orders. I do my best teaching my new followers and even treat them better than my original herd, to both increase their loyalty and discipline while simultaneously alienating the older fluffies. The old ones are still stubborn and scared of me because i had to constantly terrorize them to make them learn in their stupid brains about the most simple survival facts but at least the new fluffies around here are more malleable and eager to learn.
I am not lying when i say they are loyal, all of them loves me more than their own father (partially because i planned for them to keep doing their jobs and therefore not interact with their babies unlike me). The admiration makes me feel amazing but the benefits of loyalty were my goal.
The 2 alicorns have grown up and formed a strong bond with their mother, who would have thought they would become so attached to the mothers who tried to kill them constantly during their early days? They constantly play with them and the mothers reciprocate too, being sorry and giving as much love as a fluffy can give. Both have verified the higher degree of intelligence in fluffies, not as smart as me obviously, but they catch on extremely fast in comparison to the others, they even understood why we couldn’t run and instead use holes for hiding without me explaining! Might make them my right arm, erm, right hoof from now on.
The smarties? 2 of them are constantly crying and sad thinking themselves of being “the worst fluffies ever” after the sessions they had with me in their young days, not my problem. The real deal is the one who recovered from the degrading treatment, a brown smarty, have you look at that walking paradox, it’s constantly annoying me and trying to order others, he doesn’t even realize i had to imprint in their shit brains that they should not kill shit colored fluffies like you and despite that he still thinks of himself like he is a big deal, he makes me regret that choice each day. For now, I decided to keep him as a meat shield, the bastard will be the first to die. Right, his name is literally “Meatshield”, no one in the herd gets what it means except me, for its part the dumb fuck is just pestering me.
And the 5 mares are pregnant again! It was a good idea to make them excited so soon, we may expect even more members in the future. And before you ask no, i haven’t fucked a fluffy, i may have been transformed into a fluffy but only after my death i will copulate with one of those damn shitrats.
For now i am gonna designate and teach the new members their new jobs as sentries, workforce in digging strategic holes, fence explorers and a new successor to both Lapdog and Nummer. This time i gave no names, giving one would create more problems and create a whole reward system of all these fluffies and I can’t bother to naming them all. Also, being the only one named the “leader” made me a more mystical figure for them.
There’s not much time left for the new generation to fully mature and breed even more. We grew so much with only 5 mares, more will make me a conqueror!
Gahahaha! My herd will be the best there is! I will survive and reign as a king in this life!
…
…
…
(The mother of the monster leader was sulking in sad memories. The leader barely gave any work to the mares and ignored them almost all the time except on the few designated play times he decided.
She hated him, how could a fluffy order them around so much? How a fluffy not cry when a friend dies? How could a fluffy say so many nu nu words and scary what ifs to them? How could a fluffy make them so scared? And worst of all, How did she even call him her “bestest baby” at the start?
He is no good fluffy, he is scary and bad.
She hated his own son, hated him so much. It’s been many forevers since she could sleep without scary dreams and fear. And to make things worse she birthed a baby with horn and wings, a monster…again. Only when the baby was gone and the new big alicorn fluffy came to be her new baby she finally had love and hugs after so much time. But even that could not calm her heart… And she was powerless to do anything…)
…
…
…
Now we are talking, the full fluffy intelligence network i have been envisioned has fully developed with the new members. We have a big perimeter surrounding us to effectively spot any danger near to us and communicate any anomaly that may be noticed, truly, if all fluffies did this in the wild perhaps it wouldn’t be common to find so many carcasses anywhere.
In fact, my fanatics worked so hard they put the older fluffies to shame. Not only they quickly responded to all threats and successfully notified us but actually managed to keep everyone alive. We stealthily survived a wild hog near us and a massive bird migration flying over us! Hell yeah, with so many capable workers i finally can take it easy! I have truly taught them in their small heads like the genius i am compared to them!
Hmm… i may have taken it so easy… i actually lost some muscles and got fatter, not morbidly obese but i ain’t the young athletic dreamer that knocked down Bitch in a single hit. Not that it matters, i got a real team here. They adore me and follow me. Gahaha! This is great, even the few new mares invited me to be their “bestest friend”, at the same time! Not that i accepted, not fucking a toy horse ever, but that got me really happy.
In the theme of babies and bestest friends, we got a new batch. This time was a small one, only 9 between the 5 mares.
The first one birthed 6 babies but only 2 survived, no idea why, all normal colors thankfully. Total: 2 babies.
The second pridefully showed me their triplet unicorns of the same purple color, no deaths unlike the rest and she was absolutely delighted for that, and i must give it that, she, indeed, was the best mother now. Total: 5 babies.
The third one was devastated. All the 4 babies died and the only survivor was a runt, nope, can’t maintain a useless lump like that so i didn’t stop her from killing it. Total: 5 babies. Perhaps i must give it some counseling or something, a “wan die” would be catastrophic for the glass-like morale of fluffies.
The fourth mare was emotionless, weird, she simply spawned the things and silently attended them. Strange, what’s going on in her head? So, out of 4 babies, only 3 were healthy and one runt was killed by her, justified, but i hated how that bitch did it discreetly without letting me see. And perhaps the reason why she’s so perplexed: The 3 remaining babies are poopy colored, but their manes have exotic patterned colors and one of them was an alicorn too! Like a monkey wearing the most delightful and exquisite dress to ever exist, the mother was at a loss of words, she obviously would have preferred the triplets. Need to keep an eye to prevent her from killing the alicorn, although… she birthed an alicorn before… is there a pattern i am not seeing? Total: 8 babies.
The fifth one, my mother, birthed two babies, only one survived… an alicorn… again…
Jesus fuck, seriously, WHAT IS THE PATTERN? I would have been rich as a human knowing how to generate this many alicorns but right now i need it more than ever. Alicorns are smarter, and considering how Darwinism works, i need as many of them as possible.
Alright so, both alicorns mothers are bowl fluffies, uh… but the third bowl fluffy never gave birth an alicorn? Alright, alright, so they breeded with earthies, that’s it? No, no, the third mare disproves it… perhaps… both are bad colored bowl fluffies breeding with earth fluffies?; Yeah, yeah, that must be, my mother and the other mare obviously not shit color unlike others, otherwise they would have suffered in this world, but in human standards like mine you could buy a dozen of biotoys with the same color with a dollar… Need to try investigating this in the future, i need to research this. Perhaps in time an actual smart herd composed of alicorns would make our everyday life a breeze.
And now…
None of that matters! We are fucked!
I underestimated how much food a herd this big consumes! The flora is nearly annihilated in our vicinity! And to think i just finished the perimeter dream…
But yeah, that’s the cruel truth, we need to find another shelter. Start from zero. Not gonna lie, i am kinda attached to the great base i made with sweat, fluffy blood and my own time but I can’t change the obvious future.
“Hewd! Weader nee’ aww tu hear! Com’ hewe!”
The outposts got abandoned and a big group surrounded me.
“Weader says nummies are few hewe, we nee’ find niu housies!”
“B-Bu’ babbeh, babbeh nee’ housies!” The mother of triplets stated in frustration.
“Weader wight, nummies too few hewe, nee’ niu housies ewsewere” “Tru’, housies wiww lowse aww nummies sun’, liswen weader!”
Have you look at that, both alicorns argued for me. Huh, i really must research how to get more of them.
“Tru’! Hewd wiww dai hewe, forevah sweepies! Fow babbeh, fow yu fwiends and famiweh, hewd must gu’!
The older fluffies murmured in doubt but my fanatics cheered. Then, by merit of numbers, me and my followers unilaterally agreed to begin our journey.
Oh, and the smarty Meatshield near me, he will be the first to die if anything happens.
…
…
…
(The mare fluffy remembers, she remembers the old leader, he was a good fluffy, always permitted the herd to play and eat whatever they pleased, whenever they wanted, also he was her bestest friend, gave a lot of love to her and her babies before flying monster took them all away. True, many friends died, but now that he’s gone and the monster leader in its place the dreams of her bestest friend have never left.
Play is limited and hugs are few, this monster leader was always telling everyone what to do and controls everyone as he pleases. And worst of all, he doesn’t care for the friends deaths! Forever sleepies is the worst thing to happen to any fluffy and he doesn’t cry or gets angry! She hates this, and while cooing her three unicorns she drowns in anger until the dreams makes her forget for a while.)
…
…
…
You know? I consider myself being a smart guy, at least related to living here and most themes revolving around the HasBio toys designation “Fluffy”.
If anything, without me, they would be dead or not even born. My intelligence is what kept this herd going…
…which is why i have no idea why i didn’t plan on traveling by night.
“Dɛn na wokae?” A tall human quickly emerged from a small entrance in the ground of the dam, i had no idea it was some sort of entrance to begin with.
“Electricity. E-lec-tri-ci-ty. Go on, try again.” Another man followed, he, too, was dressed with an obvious mechanical outfit made for the workers here.
Shit those are two bad news, probably engineers from this dam, same accent as the fluffies. Damnit, we are on the open crossing the dam, literally on the middle of a white dam with no cover, i have grown so complacent that i forgot to take this more seriously, think, think, think now!
“What’s that?”
They noticed us, we literally cannot hide, the other fluffies are petrified by fear after i taught them to fear everything unknown, great survival skill as long it doesn’t bite me in the ass now. Come on, improvise and survive!
“Fluffies? This many? Here? Almost all the horses like you die on the fence, you must be a smart little guy, aren’t you?
Right, communicate, use dialogue, keep distance but don’t escape. We can’t be sure of his intentions.
(“Hewd, behiwnd me, nao’…)
My group quickly understood. Now…
“Hewwo, am’ weader fwuffy. Hewd nee’ cwoss dam, no maik…uh… bad poopies hewe, lewt hewd pawws pwease”
Alright, be smart and try to appeal to them but don’t divulge my real human intelligence or they may catch me and use me as a freak for my human knowledge.
“Hmm… You true, no shit here, expected you to be smarty shit, go on, just never go inside the dam or you will get killed alright?”
Eh? I did it? That’s all? Man, if it was me i would have taken my time killing the herd. Ha…haha…Gahahahaha! I did it! We can leave, thank god they are good Samaritans. No deaths today thankfully-
“Dummeh hooman, wet smawty pass ow get sowwy poopies and wowsest stompies!!!”
What?
Who did just?
I see it now, Meatshield is inflating his cheeks and spewing insults to the technicians… who just spared our lives…
Oh you absolute moron son of the used whore you call mother and fucking walking shit staining this place why the fuck are you ruining this?! You are supposed to die for us, not kill us all!
“Leave that shit for the end.”
Before i could react a mare with all her babies on her back was stomped next to me, her death was instantaneous but the babies flying around were not, in their fall all they could do is chirp and cry in a horrifying picture of mutilated innocence and biotoy blood.
The man who stood silent all this time grabbed the smarty with his left hand and with the other grabbed other member of my herd, this time a fanatic of mine and threw it over the dam doomed to falling to a slow and painful death in the claws of gravity.
We are gonna die, in the panic i order everyone to disperse and run, too much empty space and too slow to outrun or hide, absolute fucking moron Meatshield i should have killed when you were born, should have stomped when you were a baby!
That’s it, babies, he should have died as a baby. And what baby is valuable?!
As quickly as i could, i middle of the slaughter i ran to the slow mares and stole the two alicorns and in my mouth i presented them to the humans.
“Wook! WOOK!!, WOOOK!!!” I scream at the top of my lungs, catching their attention, this is my final bet.
“Watch this man, an alicorn, at least we are getting something out of this shitrats” He said as trying to grab the special babies.
“HEEEEEWD!!! COME HEWE!!!” Despite their fear they were even more surprised for what they saw and slowly, overcoming their deep fear, came back.
For i managed to take hostages.
“Weave hewd and babbeh youws…”
I threat the humans with the alicorn babies heads under my hoofs, they are fragile, weak, barely born, a gentle squish from even a fluffy like me it would be enough to kill them.
Man how I wish I could run and leave them to die, the tension here is killing me, but I know that running is useless, this is my only chance to survive.
Both men look at me with hate filled eyes, being put into a checkmate by a shitrat is truly embarrassing, they could kill me at any moment but the alicorns? They are valuable, one of a kind type, even one with the worst colors can be worth a fortune to the right buyer. I don’t know what country I am but if the national currency is worth less than dollar then this is a tremendous opportunity for these people, one they cannot ignore. And to lose this much cash to a simple biotoy? It would the worst.
“Look here fluffy, I got sketties, want sketties? Come here, leave the babi-“
“DU NOT COME HEWE OW I SWEAW TU GOD I WIWW KIWW DESE FOAWS!!” I said while adding slight weight to the babies, enough to make them chirp in pain but not enough to kill them, I can’t let them close the gap,
“You think I am gonna negotiate with a fucking fluffy?”
“IF YU KIWW ME I AM TAKIN’ DESE BABIES WITH ME, WET MAI HEWD PASS NAO!”
They understood they were not talking with a regular fluffy now.
It was their choice: The babies or killing us.
Behind me the fluffies were standing still in fear, they wanted to keep running but my two alicorns understood what’s going on and knew that it was impossible to outrun these monsters, because of that they tried to quietly convince them to get near.
The men were, out of all things, negotiating with a fluffy but there was a lot of money in this exchange, obtaining it is enough to throw their pride?
“We have your friend, you think it’s a good idea to take hostages now imbecile?” The man bluffed while his partner dangled the smarty around.
“Wet smawty gu, wet smawty gu ow get wowsest hoofsies” The garbage said, not understanding that he created all of this to begin with.
“I. DUN’. CAWE. Decide nao’ ow dese bags of moneeh awe gonna dissapeaw forevah!” To intensify my threat I make the second foal cry too.
They watch me.
I watch them.
My heard is expecting the result of death and life.
The smarty is speaking gibberish.
After several ice cold seconds of complete deadly silence only interrupted by the smarty the man finally spoke.
“Ekow… You know one alicorn money costs a lot of dollars right? You have any idea how many Cedi we can get? Let that shit on the floor and let them pass.”
Wait a second, I do not care about the smarty, just let me and my herd go, as far as I care you could kill the bastard now, in fact, do it, throw it to its death, we do not need Meatshield here.
Not that I have a choice in the matter now, things are barely holding up, can’t say anything more, its suicide.
“Hewd…Gu, gu tu othew side, du it nao…”
Scared to death the survivors of my herd slowly walked to the other side of the dam, the alicorns stood at the front and the back as I indicated to make them move as a unit. Me, on the other hand, kept watching the technicians with my hooves on the alicorns, ready to kill them if necessary.
It was an endless moment, I felt like time stopped while watching on the face of the two men who could murder me at any moment. If I could leave the hostage situation to another fluffy I would but I doubt even the alicorns can endure this painful stress.
Then, when my herd passed through I was alone with them.
“You are a crafty little shit you know?”
“I wouwd hav’ dwied a wong taim agu if i wasn’t…” I answer, realizing how much i screwed up. I managed to save the others but not myself, what am I doing?
“It would not bother me to feed and take care of you as a pet. What do you think? Have good meals, watch television, have safe fun instead of being here…”
Stop worrying about death? Sleep without worries? Forget about my responsibilities?
Sounds nice… tempting even…
…But these fuckers don’t know me.
“Gwahahahaha! Danks bu’ nu! I am da gweatest fwuffeh evew, cannot be a pewt yu know?”
“You know we are gonna come back for you right? After this, you can’t get to live around here for free. Just a matter of time until I call the exterminators on your ass.”
“’new dat. Nao’, I am gonna gu, take da babies an’ get youw cash aftew sewwin’ them…”
I leave the foals alone. I have no leverage against them, if I could go back in time I would still have no idea what I could have done, can’t think of any way out of this for me or my herd.
With the worst fear I ever had in my whole life I valiantly crossed. Having those two guys on my back was the most excruciatingly tense moment I had, every step reminded me of how they could simply take me and torture me for the rest of my life.
And yet…nothing came.
“Take care dipshit, hope you live another day.”
After crossing the bridge and reuniting with my herd I knew that I made it, I ridiculed other humans as a fucking shitrat and came back alive while the fuckers took it with their tail between the legs.
“GWAHAHAHAHAHA! WEADER IS AWIVE!!!”
…
…
…
When our group was finally far and in a perfect position I simply lacked the mental strength to continue. I was tired, in a physical and psychological sense. Could not think of anything besides sleeping and forgetting all of this.
I saved all of them but for what? I knew I could not outrun the dudes and I simply had no idea how could I escape, even sacrificing my entire herd wasn’t a complete guarantee to survive by myself. But also…why? Why? Why Didn’t I just ran? My herd are tools, mere meatshields for me to hide into, their purpose is follow my orders and ensure my safety… Which makes the course of action the more illogical…
No…That’s not true… after all this time I kind of feel something for them… they all die so quickly but they are innocent and pure… I loved murdering them for this very reason but watching them grow, follow me, take me as their idol…made me want to act the same way as they saw me…The first batch growing was an experience, how they reacted to my propaganda, the slow grow into adults and the two alicorns, oh man the two alicorns, they are too cool for being a shitrat…Perhaps we could be more friends tomorrow…
And like that, I succumbed to sleep, I did not care about the casualties number, nor the new designations needed in this new hideout and even less about the status in the herd overall. I just needed a refresher after defying death eye to eye…
…
…
…
(How dare the leader let those humans trample smarty soon-to-be herd, he did nothing and instead gifted 2 babies to them, what a coward! I don’t care about the alicorn dumb fluffies telling me that he did it for us, he is dumb, he is the worst leader, as the great smarty I am I could have simply given those dumb humans their forever sleepies.
Hate the leader, leader coward, Meatshield was about to stomp those dummies, but today he will see, he will see that I deserve being the new leader, he will get forever sleepies while I become the new leader, no more jobs, no more orders, eat all I want, drink wherever I want, play and hugs all the time! Yes, Meatshield will be the new leader!
But Meatshield needs to find friends to take dumb leader down, and I know where to find them.)
…
(The mother followed the smarty, he said he is gonna give the monster leader forever sleepies and she will help her, she may be a mare but that monster must go forever sleepies for herd. He is a bad leader, he always orders and laughs at fluffies who doesn’t follow his orders, he is very bad. And today, he even took his alicorn baby! The alicorn baby is just like his big alicorn baby! She doesn’t fear the horn and wings anymore, for she already knows that monster baby becomes good son after some time. And now? Baby is gone with human thanks to monster leader. Mother hates you for being a bad leader, mother wishes you were never born.)
…
(After all this time the mare could get her revenge, all the nights dreaming of her bestest friend killed by the monster leader would be rewarded with the sweet scent of his sorry wawas. He must go forever sleepies, he must never come back like his bestest friend did. And after he’s gone he would have another leader, a good leader who lets everyone play at all times and make her forget the pain. For that… she must try to bring him down along with smarty… And because she remembers, she will NEVER forget how the monster leader killed his beloved.)
…
…
…
“SCREEEEEE-“AAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHH! WHAT THE FUCK?!
I was just sleeping, what is this pain in my neck, fuck!
Is this… a branch? In my neck there’s a branch! It’s not that deep but I am stuck with this piercing my skin.
W-Who are those?
Near me, surrounding me, there’s three fluffies, my mother, a mare and Meatshield.
This could only mean something.
The bastards are betraying me.
Fucking hell, I should have kept training, my body is softer than it was in my prime. Fuck, fuck, fuck, my neck hurts. Agh, these idiots think they can bring me down? It would take hundreds of you to take me down! I am the greatest!
“Gwahahah –ack- hahahaha! Yu fuckews just want tu dai –ugk- dat badweh?!”
I maintained my techniques and took the initiative, pushing the mares to the side and punching the smarty with my frontal hooves.
Must be weaker than usual because the mares quickly got back up and the smarty simply took it to the face. They were crying, not being used to fight and pain but even after the punch and in middle of tears they were still pushing me around. They had no concept of combat, all they knew was replicating the movements of their plays with more strength and deadlier intent.
I thought I could simply keep aiming their eyes and I did, but I felt something worrying.
The branch in my neck kept going further, deeper.
This is bad, this was initially a small pierce but after all this struggling I can notice more and more bleeding in my neck. I am the greatest fluffy ever, I can’t let these shits dirty my fur with blood.
They kept moving me around like a rag from multiple angles, it was hard to maintain balance and I could not impulse my hits with solid ground. Thus limited myself to aiming at the eyes and pressing them as hard as I could. It worked, the mares recoiled from the massive pain after my hits but Meatshield kept pushing me to the ground.
With all my might I managed to throw him to the side and finally got some breathing room, taking my stance I used all the strength in my legs to impulse my impact to him, sadly, only his leg was in my range, it was enough because I could hear an audible crack.
“SCREEEEEE-“
Take that you punk, I am gon-
Ack, damn it the other two mares are still here, I think my mother can’t see from one busted eye but in middle of their pain they kept going with murderous intent. What the fuck is motivating these fucks?
Ugk, Shit, lucky bitch, the other mare used the timing of my mother pushing me to keep digging my neck with the branch. It was not that strong but I felt how the bleeding steadily intensified.
Come on, come on, wait for it, wait for it, TAKE THIS BITCH, throwing dirt at my mother wound was painful enough to give me time, while she was shocked I reversed the push and used her as a meatbag against the other mare. She, surprised, did not know how to react, and after using all the strength I could muster I was able to push my mom over the other mare. Before she could regain her foot i moved as quickly as I could next to her locked body by the weight of my mother, taking aim, I pressed my hoof on her eye, she agonized but I wasn’t done, I pressed my hoof in the same place again but this time I jumped with all my weight, the hole went deeper enough for her to stop moving.
Fuck, that’s one to go… Now, shit, my mother regained her balance and started pushing me again, I was getting weaker by the second, I need to end this and apply pressure in my bleeding right the fuck now- AGH, Fucking bitch got a godlike stroke of luck and managed to make it even worse.
The branch in my neck went as deep as it could.
“Mummah sav’ hewd from munstah weader! Get forevah sweepies!”
I could visibly see how there was a fountain of blood outside my body, the jugular! Piece of shit I am gonna murder you! I am gonna fucking kill you!
Enraged, with a newfound superfluffy strength I threw her into the dirt, with all my might I pushed her eye too, pressing, twisting, circling and thrusting until she stopped moving. She tried to get me off her, to leave her alone but it was for nothing.
After a seemingly infinite struggle she finally stopped moving too.
Two…Two to go…Gahaha… these idiots cannot kill me…
And now… the smarty…
Before I knew the blood spraying all around took finally its toll on me, my legs immediately lost their force and I fell, I tried to breathe and no air was enough, my mind was drifting all over, man the adrenaline must have ran out, fuck I need to keep focused, keep…
…keep focu…sed…
The leader died without being capable of making a final thought, in time, his crimson fluffy blood was already spilled all over in middle of the woods, his death meant the end of the herd and their impending doom.
The smarty on the other hand suffered a worse fate. He thought simply surviving the encounter would be enough to be the new leader. He was wrong, when the rest of the herd arrived, he tried to proclaim himself the new leader and demanded help, in response, the fanatics trampled all over his body and kept him from dying for a few days to prolong his suffering. No amount of threats, pleading or promises could save him from his demise, there was a small attempt at a coup from the very few older members of the herd who despised the leader and wanted the smarty to be the leader, however, being outnumbered, they died swiftly.
The herd, on the other hand, perished. Though they attempted at replicating the methods learned from the defunct leader, they could not maintain the system for long. Brave attempts by the alicorn pair and fanatics tried to keep the herd working as much as they could, sadly, it was a matter of time until discord and internal fights kept flourishing left and right, breaking the balance. Worst of all, even if they could organize, no one knew of the exterminators going back to hunt them except the leader, only death awaited them.
Everyone except the two alicorns were methodically slaughtered, these two, carrying their leader memories, are currently trying to survive Ghana wilderness by themselves, successful so far, they managed to contact other feral fluffies and are enjoying a healthy 10 member herd. Though they are no match for the greatest fluffy ever, they will try to keep on living and teach the next generations of the great leader.
